Steve Benson gets his panties in a wad when called out

[_Mercury]

http://www.reddit.com/r/exmormon/comments/a1dz2/exmo_steve_benson_created_a_atheist_santa_ad_for/

Looks like ole stevie wonderboy does not like it when called out for his flaws.

[_Jersey Girl]

What IS that place, Mercury? I've never seen it before.

For some reason, I find Benson irritating whenever I happen to see his posts on RFM and so I rarely read him at all. I think the "schtick" factor that someone on that link noted is the reason why I don't find him interesting.

[Guest]

Panties in a wad? I just see a guy who is responding in a controlled manner to yet another misrepresentation of himself by an obviously less than objective haranger. The only way I would believe that Steve Benson made that statement about his gf is if the claimant cites the source.

It's a strange phenomenon to me that mos and exmos alike have such dislike, and hatred in some cases, for Benson. Many exmos say he shouldn't be rude about his gf. But hey, the rest of the exmo world is free to say whatever they want about family, friends, ward members, bishops, SPs and other church leaders, in the name of their own recovery.

I can't imagine anyone more in need of recovery than someone who grew up inside the dysfunctional "belly of the beast". By that I mean at the heart of Mormonism, being in the family of a Mormon prophet, immersed in "the church" from birth, experiencing Mormonism to the nth degree, with no allowance for one's own uniqueness, ambitions and talents.

Before your panties wad up, Merc, I'm not blindly defending Benson (or RfM!). Just saying that he gets attacked, harangued, trolled, disrespected, and slandered regularly. And that's just from apparent fellow exmos. Add in the Mormons who decry him (grandsons of prophets should never, after all, leave the church, diss their family or have a contrary opinion, much less a lack of belief), and the trolls that flock to the Benson magnet, and the thing must be a nightmare. Upon a nightmare. I don't see much opportunity for "recovery" in any of that. I think he's done well in his life and in what must have been a struggle (perhaps ongoing) to "recover" from his youth. (Who said that we spend our adult years trying to recover from childhood?) Many have difficult early years but add in a strong religious overlay and that often increases the trauma and need for recovery.

How come any "anon" is free to outline their bad experience in Mormonism and they are believed by fellow exxies and offered friendly conversation and support but if your name is Benson you're a life-size target for all sides?

I thought I was losing my mind after just three years as a non-entity in a Mormon ward far away from the heart of Mormonism. I truly cannot imagine remaining sane after being brought up in an intensely all-encompassing religious environment that offered no room for exploration and self-expression. One of the best gifts my parents gave us kids was to teach us to see all sides to a question and to look behind every facade to see what lurks. We were actually taught to think and ask questions and avoid just falling in with the status quo. It must be stifling to be squelched at every turn. Well, I know about that firsthand to some degree as I was consistently told, first as an investigator, then as a new member and beyond, to sit on my questions and just follow instructions. Yeah, that should have been a red flag to me. But that's another story.

Meanwhile, I don't care what you, Mercury, or anyone else thinks of Steve Benson but I like to see that at least the criticism is valid and not all these mischaracterizations, inaccuracies and even lies. You'd think exmos would value accuracy and truth. Trolls? Not so much.

[_Jersey Girl]

How come any "anon" is free to outline their bad experience in Mormonism and they are believed by fellow exxies and offered friendly conversation and support but if your name is Benson you're a life-size target for all sides?

Because he makes himself a life-size target. Sheesh.

[_Mercury]

Steve is a whore, plain and simple. Hes playing his grandfathers game in the small pond of the exmo world. Why you seem to materialize every time RFM is beng called out is in itself an issue, Nightingale.

Why does stevie wonderboy have such dedicated defenders? Because he has built a cult around his microcosmic celebrity.

Steve needs to take his silver spoon and disappear if the Exmormon community is to move on and improve.

[_Mercury]

Meanwhile, I don't care what you, Mercury, or anyone else thinks of Steve Benson but I like to see that at least the criticism is valid and not all these mischaracterizations, inaccuracies and even lies. You'd think exmos would value accuracy and truth. Trolls? Not so much.

Well Duh! Of course you don't care what I think. You are drinking the kool aide of the Benson Personality Cult. My opinion is irrelevant, your and stevies opinion is Gospel.

I get it, I really do. I know what you are going through.

Random query: Nightingale == Steve?

[_Nightingale]

How come any "anon" is free to outline their bad experience in Mormonism and they are believed by fellow exxies and offered friendly conversation and support but if your name is Benson you're a life-size target for all sides?

Because he makes himself a life-size target. Sheesh.

I'm not sure why my comment rates a "sheesh".

But anyway.

I long ago realized that due to the content of his posts he can't be "anon" as he would be easily recognizable, unlike most of the rest of us who can be as anon as we want. Also, though, I figure it's part of his character as a straight-shooter that he would use his name. I note that other exmos who do so are also targeted more than other posters. Curiously, it's most often the ones who post factual information and background about the church and who analyze its history and plumb the depths of the main issues that become targets. That cannot be a coincidence (eg: RandyJ, Simon Southerton as well as some others who use board names but are well recognized such as SLCabbie and Deconstructor).

I note that many new exmos are thankful for the information they receive from the posters named above, including Benson.

[_Nightingale]

Meanwhile, I don't care what you, Mercury, or anyone else thinks of Steve Benson but I like to see that at least the criticism is valid and not all these mischaracterizations, inaccuracies and even lies. You'd think exmos would value accuracy and truth. Trolls? Not so much.

Well Duh! Of course you don't care what I think. You are drinking the kool aide of the Benson Personality Cult. My opinion is irrelevant, your and stevies opinion is Gospel.

Uh. Merc. You may want to read again what I actually wrote:

NG: "... I don't care what you, Mercury, or anyone else thinks of Steve Benson..."

I did not say I don't care what you think but rather, I don't care what you think of Steve Benson, if you'd care to check out my statement again. I obviously must care about your opinion in general, or at least your comments, as I'm participating in your thread. Not that you ever make that pleasant, in my experience. {{slaps head for diving in - it's a lazy snowy Sunday here and I could just be relaxing by the fire with a good book instead of banging into yet another brick wall, again}}

And where, on earth, ever, have I said anything like your opinion is irrelevant and mine is gospel? Sheesh indeed.

Why do you insist on miscomprehending my words and interpreting them to mean I am part of a "Benson cult"? It's beyond bizarre.

I seem to have lost the part of your post that says something about me defending RfM. (I anticipated you would make that comment - you never fail to disappoint on that score, hence my mention of RfM in my first response to you above). I _hardly_ show up and "defend" every single time you and myriad others complain about, criticize, and misrepresent RfM. (That would be a full time job and I already have one of those). It's interesting to note that many of the worst complainers don't hesitate to use RfM to their own advantage - when they need to vent, are asking for support, want to more widely advertise something etc.

I think you still see things as black and white and it seems you think in generalizations. One cannot say a single positive word about Benson (or who/whatever) or they are "drinking the Kool-Aid". I can say I liked my bishop when I was attending the Mormon Church and that kind of thinker replies "put down the Kool-Aid". Not much is ever so completely black/white, either/or. Same with the Benson issue. For what it's worth, I don't particularly like to read personal family background, especially when it's uncomplimentary. I can't imagine uncovering "family secrets" for the world to poke about at. I don't particularly enjoy reading the annual Benson Christmas bash against Christian beliefs. It can be shocking and even hurtful to read a fellow exmo's opinion that you fall into an undesirable category that is deservedly disrespected and mock-worthy due to your beliefs and associations. (But after five years you can get acclimatized to it!). But all that - and more - doesn't mean I can't see positive things about the man or that he doesn't deserve me to try and see where he is coming from.

Tell me what about any of that makes me a "cult member"? Please.

Random query: Nightingale == Steve?

Oh good heavens. Now you really have totally lost it Merc. I am female. He is male. People have met each one of us. We are real. There are two of us. We actually live in different countries.

Also, I can't draw to save my life.

[_Nightingale]

Also, Merc, about "showing up" whenever a certain topic is mentioned - many posters do that. Many lurk more than they post but chime in when a topic pops up that relates to their specific area of interest.

Mention "Mesoamerica" and you can bet a bundle that beastie will likely "show up". Mention a board issue and Shades will likely respond. Say "Boy's Ranch" and here comes Eric. Type "DCP" and Scratch manifests.

I see that on every board (of the ones I read, obviously).

There is nothing sinister about it. To the contrary, it is completely understandable.

[_Mercury]

The Exmormon "movement" has generally forgotten Steve Benson. Most if not all exmormons I talk to that are familiar with Steves work see him as an opportunistic individual more interested in regurgitating the same stories gleaned from his proximity to the seats of Mormon power. He adds nothing to the exmormon community besides bitterness. I mock and scorn those who I see as hypocritical. Stevie wonderboy is a hypocrite. Why? Because he applies the same patterns of building and maintaining a personality cult the LDS corporation uses. When individuals are critical of him he retreats into a copy-and-paste frenzy.

Its just silly, stupid and petty.

As to your lurking tendencies, are you saying that RFM and by extension Steve is your area of expertise? Why does steve and RFM need defenders? I don't get it. If RFM is such a laudable endeavor, why does it need apologists? Your membership in the Steve Benson Booster Club/Cult is established.