Worst LDS talks ever

[_moksha]

Let us be Men

Years ago, when my brothers and I were boys, our mother had radical cancer surgery. She came very close to death. Much of the tissue in her neck and shoulder had to be removed, and for a long time it was very painful for her to use her right arm.

One morning about a year after the surgery, my father took Mother to an appliance store and asked the manager to show her how to use a machine he had for ironing clothes. The machine was called an Ironrite. It was operated from a chair by pressing pedals with one’s knees to lower a padded roller against a heated metal surface and turn the roller, feeding in shirts, pants, dresses, and other articles. You can see that this would make ironing (of which there was a great deal in our family of five boys) much easier, especially for a woman with limited use of her arm. Mother was shocked when Dad told the manager they would buy the machine and then paid cash for it. Despite my father’s good income as a veterinarian, Mother’s surgery and medications had left them in a difficult financial situation.

On the way home, my mother was upset: “How can we afford it? Where did the money come from? How will we get along now?” Finally Dad told her that he had gone without lunches for nearly a year to save enough money. “Now when you iron,” he said, “you won’t have to stop and go into the bedroom and cry until the pain in your arm stops.” She didn’t know he knew about that. I was not aware of my father’s sacrifice and act of love for my mother at the time, but now that I know, I say to myself, “There is a man.”

The prophet Lehi pled with his rebellious sons, saying, “Arise from the dust, my sons, and be men” (2 Nephi 1:21; emphasis added).

I see this as a story of placing the desire to eliminate human suffering above money. Expecting Mormon men at that time to help do "women's work" is akin to expecting that idea to have gone over with the rest of the country 40 years earlier than the story.

[_moksha]

I see this as a story of placing the desire to eliminate human suffering above money.

Ha! That statement alone is breaking one or more Commandments laid down by William F. Buckley aboard his yacht.

[_cafe crema]

The ironing should have been done first by the young men in the family (that's how it worked when my mom got sick) and second by your "Relief Society" those women should have understood the importance of ironing and come to her aid. I don't understand the importance of ironing since I'm a child of permanent press, ironing is what I do when adding patches to the girls scout sashes and various other crafty type things.

There is no getting around it, this is an ugly story, letting a woman suffer for a year performing a minor task when there there were a number of ways to alleviate her suffering. Six men let her suffer for a year because they couldn't be bothered to do the work, or find a way to take on the work while still leaving her with a sense of contributing to the family, that's either despicable or lacking tact and motivation. Both speak poorly of the men involved.

[_Yoda]

The ironing should have been done first by the young men in the family (that's how it worked when my mom got sick) and second by your "Relief Society" those women should have understood the importance of ironing and come to her aid. I don't understand the importance of ironing since I'm a child of permanent press, ironing is what I do when adding patches to the girls scout sashes and various other crafty type things.

There is no getting around it, this is an ugly story, letting a woman suffer for a year performing a minor task when there there were a number of ways to alleviate her suffering. Six men let her suffer for a year because they couldn't be bothered to do the work, or find a way to take on the work while still leaving her with a sense of contributing to the family, that's either despicable or lacking tact and motivation. Both speak poorly of the men involved.

I agree that the story, as told, was not a good example. However, I think that if Elder Bednar had taken the time to put the story into proper context, it would have resonated a little better. Please read Harmony's post, if you haven't had a chance:

If the lady in the story was anything like my momma, she would not have welcomed the husband’s help by taking over the task no matter what. His assistance in buying a new machine that would make her task easier, yes, and she would have thanked him repeatedly for his kindness… but him actually taking over the task, as some had suggested? No. At least, not my momma. I can’t speak for the lady in the story.

When I was about 8, my mother managed to burn the bottoms of her feet so badly, she was ordered to stay in bed for 2 weeks. Daddy arranged for a neighbor girl to come in every day and do the cooking and housework. Momma was not a good patient. She had the neighbor girl set up the ironing board by the bed, so Momma could sit on the bed and still do the ironing.

I don’t think men today (and some women) understand how important it used to be (before permanent press and tumbling dryers) for the clothes to be ironed “just so”. Going out in a wrinkled shirt and pants reflected badly on the “Queen of the House”, and my momma was no different from her peers. She’d have been ashamed, had Daddy ironed his own shirts. Heck, she even ironed the handkerchiefs he blew his nose in, the sheets, and the curtains. I suspect the lady in the story and my momma would have understood each other well.

Harmony did a beautiful job of providing context for that era. It's too bad SHE isn't a General Authority! :-)

The point that should have been clearly made is that the ironing was something that the wife in the story WANTED to do. It was not something that she wanted to pawn off, and would have refused, even if others had offered. And, if others had insisted, it would have demoralized her emotionally more than helped her because it was something she took pride in doing for the family.

Until I read Harmony's post, I had a very hard time with this story, too. My household is very evenly divided as far as housework is concerned. Ironing! Ha! If my husband wants his shirts ironed, he does them himself. We have a steam cycle on our washer, so we rarely actually need to iron anything.

But if someone had tried to take over teaching my voice students because I was too sick, I would have told them "No thank you" in no uncertain terms. That is something that I take pride in, that no one else can do the way I do it. It is a contribution of extra income to the family that only I can make. But would I have appreciated maybe an electronic keyboard that I could get to easily if I couldn't walk up the stairs? Maybe that was the item my husband saved for for a year. In that scenario, I would have felt grateful and supported.

That is the same way this woman felt about the ironing, and the ironing machine purchase.

Different generations/eras/different examples.

The message was in the right place, but it was so bogged down by an outdated example, that, unfortunately, the message was lost. It either needed the type of context Harmony provided, or a different, more modern example altogether.

[_truth dancer]

I remember this talk... LOL!

Regardless of the time and place and culture, the story was completely inappropriate IMHO.

It is akin to someone sharing a story about her great grandmother who allowed her black slave to enter the front door of her house because she had a broken leg and couldn't walk to the back of the house and climb two flights of stairs.

:-)

Really, it doesn't speak well of anyone.

~td~

[_selek]

It suprises me that Packer beat out Kimball for the highest number of craptacular talks.

With Kimball's obsession with sex, I sometimes wonder if he was a closet pervert, the "preacher-who-bitches-too-much-about-sex-is-actually-gay-or-banging-hookers-syndrome", ala Fallwell or that preacher from Colorado.

[_Darth J]

I think we can all agree that the reaction to Todd Christofferson's talk has been......ironic.


Rimshot.

[_harmony]

The problem I have with most stories told in GC talks isn't that the stories don't have value or aren't clearly tied to life as it is/was lived at the time.

The problem I have is that most members don't realize they have equally valuable stories, and stories of their own are much more applicable to their own lives than anything coming over a general conference pulpit (conference being "general" and all). They repeat the GA's stories as if the GA stories were more important than their own... and they clearly aren't.

[_Yoda]

The problem I have with most stories told in GC talks isn't that the stories don't have value or aren't clearly tied to life as it is/was lived at the time.

The problem I have is that most members don't realize they have equally valuable stories, and stories of their own are much more applicable to their own lives than anything coming over a general conference pulpit (conference being "general" and all). They repeat the GA's stories as if the GA stories were more important than their own... and they clearly aren't.

Wise words of wisdom. This is why Harmony needs to be a GA! :-)

[_consiglieri]

I think we can all agree that the reaction to Todd Christofferson's talk has been......ironic.


Rimshot.

LOL.

I thought the ironing story was winceable the first time I heard it and it has lost little of its piquant flavor over the years.

But if we are talking about worst talks ever, has anybody mentioned Elder McConkie's double-hitter, "The Seven Deadly Heresies," and "The Caravan Moves On?"

From time to time, one story in an otherwise okay talk will be memorable, but it is not so often that a general authority talks from beginning to end on an entire theme that is reprehensible.

All the Best!

--Consiglieri