Turkey wrote:And how long now will that justification hold?
Perhaps from a superficial perspective the church is a good place to raise kids. But from my experience, I might argue the contrary.
Growing up, I had little reason to question the deeper meanings of life because the Mormon grownups already had all the answers. The "truth" was as dull as church. I found this stifling.
I would also point at this religion as one of the main contributors of dissent in my family. When I decided I would rather go to college than serve a mission, my mom blamed herself and dad for "not raising me right." When my sister got married to a non-member, my mom entered an emotional depression. To this day, when the family is all together, her sadness and disappointment is overwhelming. Her feelings of failure are simply because two children didn't become the TBM they ought to have. For this I blame the church & not her, as she blames herself & not her kids.
My wife and I were once a pair of disaffected young Mormons in love. Long story short, she found her way back to the iron rod; I have not. (I do still attend church with the family.)
When I am honest with my kids about my beliefs, my wife gets upset. When I used to be honest with my mother, she would get upset.
If I were to determine the single most disruptive source of harmony I've experienced in family life, it would almost certainly be -
go ahead and take a guess.
Turkey,
I trust that you and your wife have had rather detailed talks about why you have remained far from the iron rod and she has re-found it. To whatever extent you'd explain that, I think it would be fascinating.
From your post, it seems that your iron-rod-holding wife cannot tolerate you explaining your beliefs to your children. My guess is that she explains her regained beliefs to them, and you do not object. It seems then that you are okay with your children hearing both sides of the faith divide, and making their own individual choices, but that you believing wife is not. Have you and your wife come to any common ground on how to raise your kids regarding the issue of faith, and Mormon faith in particular?