I don’t know that ex-Mormons are better off as ex-Mormons in most cases. I have no doubt they are in some cases. In many cases it’s probably a wash. That’s because most people are who they are in any set of circumstances, and a change of scenery does not necessarily result in a great personal transformation.No real disagreement. The Gospel is supposed to be about life not church. However, DCP's contention was restricted to the Sunday activities of apostates, and how that compares to the Sunday activities of believing LDS. He enquired how these apostates are really any better off. Well, even with a cynical take in line with DCP's beliefs, that apostates have found their own "faith-based" and ritualistic religion or substitute thereof, then apostates are better off for themselves in their new religion because now their "worship" centers on a message they really believe in. And if it becomes a chore to log into Reddit (or here) on Sundays to take a few swings, maybe that is just "paying dues" for a new life that is more fulfilling for themselves on the whole.
The strong form of DCP's contention is that the apostates are better off than the apologists on Sundays, and it's possible that some apostates believe that their Sunday lives are not only more fulfilling for themselves personally, but more fulfilling than the lives of TBMs. That would be kind of a stretch, again the cynical view, wouldn't tools enjoy being tools?
Church has huge implied negativity. And you would expect larger organizations to spend less time complaining about smaller organizations than smaller ones do about larger ones. Of course Verizon spends less time on Twitter complaining about customers they don't like than customers do about Verizon. The Mormon Church when it was younger and more fragile most certainly spent more time actively defining itself against other religious groups. It's all still there more subtly, the implication of apostasy and everyone else being wrong but them, the implication of restoration, the more direct occasional jabs against the trinity and lots of church talks condemning the paid ministries of other churches.
Now, it is true that people love to talk about how wonderful their life is now that they have changed scenery. Ex-Mos love to talk about how much better life is without the church in it. I am skeptical, but far be it from me to spoil their emotional boost from making the claim. Same goes for active LDS. Are they so much happier than others? I doubt it.
Happiness is a silly obsession, and I am not going to invest much confidence in claims of how wonderfully happy people are because X.