Righteousness never was happiness

[_Buffalo]

Buffalo,

Enjoy this freely:

No guilt. Thanks Zeez.

[_bcspace]

Which means your weren't actually living the gospel but rather, some pharisaical notion of it not extant in LDS doctrine.

In other words, I was obedient to the teachings of modern LDS prophets, and my mission leaders.

Apparently not.

[_Buffalo]

Apparently not.

Apparently you skipped Sunday school, priesthood and mission preparation to go smoke in the boys room.

[_Stormy Waters]

So I was miserable most of the time. The only time I was happy was when I had no time to contemplate - having fun conversations with certain companions and friends in wards that let me step outside myself, or having a good conversation/lesson with investigators.

On my mission our phone calls home were limited to 30 minutes. My first mothers day I remember watching the clock as I talked to my family, and then having to abruptly end the conversation when my time had expired. When I hung up the phone I remember feeling a wave of depression. With every family member my interaction had been extremely brief and rushed. I had spent the whole time worrying about how much time I had left.
When I had my Christmas phone call I decided to ignore the rules and talk to my family as long as I damned well pleased. When I ended my Christmas phone call I remember feeling immensely satisfied having been able to take my time and speak with each family member for as long as I wanted. I no longer gave a damn what the rules said and I was happier for it.

You can't limit phone calls home on Christmas to 30 minutes, and then turn around and tell people you're not a cult.

[_Buffalo]

So I was miserable most of the time. The only time I was happy was when I had no time to contemplate - having fun conversations with certain companions and friends in wards that let me step outside myself, or having a good conversation/lesson with investigators.

On my mission our phone calls home were limited to 30 minutes. My first mothers day I remember watching the clock as I talked to my family, and then having to abruptly end the conversation when my time had expired. When I hung up the phone I remember feeling a wave of depression. With every family member my interaction had been extremely brief and rushed. I had spent the whole time worrying about how much time I had left.
When I had my Christmas phone call I decided to ignore the rules and talk to my family as long as I damned well pleased. When I ended my Christmas phone call I remember feeling immensely satisfied having been able to take my time and speak with each family member for as long as I wanted. I no longer gave a damn what the rules said and I was happier for it.

You can't limit phone calls home on Christmas to 30 minutes, and then turn around and tell people you're not a cult.

Thanks for sharing that, Stormy Waters. I think we can clearly see that the church isn't a safe or healthy place for people who take it too seriously.

[_just me]

I've never been on a mission, but I can still relate.

I literally would pray that I could be perfect.

Even following all the big commandments there is always something to feel guilty about.

I felt like I should read the scriptures more, or pray more or go to the temple more.

Then there is the frequent message that the members need to be doing more missionary work. I always felt bad because I really didn't have any non-members I was close to...and I was only ever comfortable telling people what I believe, not trying to convert them.

OH! Then there are the 'evil' feelings that you feel guilty about. Anger is evil, so getting angry or impatient always led to increased guilt.

Being unhappy was just another thing to feel guilty for because clearly if I was (go back to the beginning of the post) reading the scriptures more, praying more, attending temple more, etc I would be happy.

I thought that if I could just be perfect I could be happy. But, the joke was on me since humans cannot achieve LDS perfectionist ideals.

[_Stormy Waters]

Thanks for sharing that, Stormy Waters. I think we can clearly see that the church isn't a safe or healthy place for people who take it too seriously.

If only someone had told me that I wasn't supposed to be taking it seriously! I must have been napping during that lesson. It would have saved me so many headaches.

[_Stormy Waters]

I thought that if I could just be perfect I could be happy. But, the joke was on me since humans cannot achieve LDS perfectionist ideals.

I often wonder how the average LDS members deals with the standards that they are burdened with. Do they all feel inadequate? Or have they just learned not to take it seriously?

[_Buffalo]

Thanks for sharing that, Stormy Waters. I think we can clearly see that the church isn't a safe or healthy place for people who take it too seriously.

If only someone had told me that I wasn't supposed to be taking it seriously! I must have been napping during that lesson. It would have saved me so many headaches.

There must have been some meeting that all these Mormon apologists went to that we missed. A meeting that said, "Don't take the commandments and doctrine too seriously or too literally. Just do what works for you!"

[_Hades]

When you leave the church you are supposed to descend into misery. TBMs are the only happy people in the whole world.

That just hasn't been my experience. Leaving the church was the best thing I ever did for my own happiness. Nothing warms my heart more than knowing I can roll out of bed whenever I want to on Sundays. I won't be dressing up and I won't be spending three hours wishing I were somewhere else. I can enjoy the football game guilt free. That's happiness.