Putting things on the shelf, is unhealthy, doesn't work - says BYU Professor

[Rick Grunder]

I chuckled to Mike Homer on the phone the other day that, if we had been born Presbyterian, life could have been a lot more boring . . .

[Moksha]

OK, I understand what he is saying about not getting tied up in knots over it all, but it was some of these deeper teachings that made Mormonism special, wasn't it?

Like Christianity was the milk of Mormonism, and polygamy with its celestial wives and elders getting their own planets and other eccentricities was its meat.

[Philo Sofee]

OK, I understand what he is saying about not getting tied up in knots over it all, but it was some of these deeper teachings that made Mormonism special, wasn't it?

Like Christianity was the milk of Mormonism, and polygamy with its celestial wives and elders getting their own planets and other eccentricities was its meat.

Yes, they've left the banquet table and now offer thin gruel poured out on the floor and call it steak and salad imagining everyone will fall for the farce and continue feasting... every now and then after a sleepless night Rusty comes up with real zingers such as twinkies or mac-n-cheese and calls it desert because he wrote the recipe down from using his pen light and pencil.

[mentalgymnast]

Why can't we just put our unresolved questions and faith crisis items on the shelf?

Ford • It’s called conflict avoidance — sweeping something under the rug, pretending it isn’t there. It’s wearing a mask that on the outside looks pure and holy. This is a consistent theme you hear again and again from Latter-day Saints, this idea that conflict is of the devil. That there is something unholy and shameful about conflict, and if I was really holy, I wouldn’t experience it.
That’s really self-defeating. If there is conflict in my life or in my family or community, I don’t want the world to know that. So that makes it harder for LDS people to seek out help from therapists or mediators.

Conflict isn’t the problem, it’s the notion that conflict is synonymous with contention. And that continues as a problem in the church. But less so nowadays as more people are dealing with conflict. The saturation within the general populace of the church produces more opportunities for resolution rather than contention since things are on the front burner rather than the back. Less likely to get burned.

Back in the day folks shelved things that are now front and center. Conflict resolution techniques kick in where at one time contention was the result when folks came at things with wildly differing perspectives. Things are somewhat more homogenized now.

Contention is of the devil, conflict isn’t.

Regards,
MG