Split from Harmony's Thread, Who Needs To Know?

[_asbestosman]

Now, on the flip side, I've dated Mormon girls and "hidden" my true beliefs from them. Things are going great! We click really well. However, when I reveal that I'm not a believer, the girl dumps me. Can we call her a bitch because she let this one fact determine my worth?

If she lets it determine your worth instead of your compatability, then yes. I see another side here. I think that for LDS people it's probably best to marry someone with an equal view and committment to the church. I know that I grew up not only wanting a temple marriage, but one where the woman was equally committed as me--that was my preference. I wouldn't make it a rule, but I think it's a good idea at least where possible. You are in special circumstances though. There really aren't many non-LDS women around.

[_Sam Harris]

Maybe I'm just too open. I have never placed a whole bunch of "must haves" on my partners.

Please wash your ass.

Please have a job and some ambition.

Please be literate.

Don't hit me, yourself, others, or our kids should we have them...and don't abuse in other ways. That includes chemicals. Not healthy. If you smoke, fine...but know that one day your lungs will probably fail. I'm used to burying people once every 3-5 years, so if you must...

I like kindness.

That's about it.

I've met some duds, but this whole "he must be this and that...." Maybe it's that I've dealt with so much rejection that I refuse to set all these rediculous prince charming standards.

[_Scottie]

Now, on the flip side, I've dated Mormon girls and "hidden" my true beliefs from them. Things are going great! We click really well. However, when I reveal that I'm not a believer, the girl dumps me. Can we call her a bitch because she let this one fact determine my worth?

If she lets it determine your worth instead of your compatability, then yes. I see another side here. I think that for LDS people it's probably best to marry someone with an equal view and committment to the church. I know that I grew up not only wanting a temple marriage, but one where the woman was equally committed as me--that was my preference. I wouldn't make it a rule, but I think it's a good idea at least where possible. You are in special circumstances though. There really aren't many non-LDS women around.

I agree with this.

I don't blame them one bit for not dating me. That is THEIR criteria. Although they are probably missing out on a great guy who would be a great father to their kids (albeit without the priesthood), that is THEIR choice to make and I don't harbor ill feelings towards them.

[_Scottie]

Maybe I'm just too open. I have never placed a whole bunch of "must haves" on my partners.

Please wash your ass.

Please have a job and some ambition.

Please be literate.

Don't hit me, yourself, others, or our kids should we have them...and don't abuse in other ways. That includes chemicals. Not healthy. If you smoke, fine...but know that one day your lungs will probably fail. I'm used to burying people once every 3-5 years, so if you must...

I like kindness.

That's about it.

I've met some duds, but this whole "he must be this and that...." Maybe it's that I've dealt with so much rejection that I refuse to set all these ridiculous prince charming standards.

To be honest, I'm much the same way. My dealbreaker list is VERY short.

There are a few "would like to have"'s, but if they don't, I'll survive.

That being said, there are many girls who are the perfect match on paper, but the chemistry just isn't there.

Choosing a mate is SOOO hard.

[_Sam Harris]

Mine chased me for five months. I got tired and he caught me. He's happy now.