Our first visit from the bishopric

[_LDSToronto]

Stemelbow,

With respect to the current back-and-forth with Buffalo, I believe you are misreading (though it was easy to misread, I'll give you that)...

I have a question for you: Have you every held a calling that required you to attend PEC/Ward Council on a regular basis? If so, how long did you hold that calling and how many (approximately) PEC/Ward Council meetings did you attend? What calling was it, if I may ask?

In the spirit of being conciliatory here, full disclosure: I will have more questions/comments based on your answers.

Thanks,
H.

[_Mad Viking]

Since moving out of Utah, we have not yet been visited by the bishopric. I was shopping at the grocery store tonight feeling very nice after my experience at mass. I haven't felt so calm in a very long time. I pull into our cul-de-sac and guess what I find? A BMW and Lexus in my driveway. I guessed immediately who it must be: members of our Ward's bishopric. I carried my groceries in (which included some Heinekens) and found that sure enough, two men in suits were in the living room visiting with my wife. I found that they had been talking with her for quite a while. This is what I found:

Our records were sent to the wrong ward and remained undiscovered until Dear Wife went to the ward for the first time today. Even though she didn't visit with the bishopric at church, her new friend met with them after she came home. The bishop called our Utah bishop's wife and had a long talk about us. He was told that we were one of the "strongest families" in the ward and that many, many prayers were being offered to get us back in the fold. Why do Mormons have to use that word, "strongest" to describe people? I don't like it.

Dear Wife told me the bishop started to cry right before I got home. It made her very uncomfortable.

You know that part of the movie "Finding Nemo" when a big, scary fish swims in front of Marlin and he says, "Good feeling's gone"? Well, that is how I felt after we started chatting. I could tell they were very sad we weren't active and seemed very uncomfortable. They wanted to say so much and I wanted the conversation to be over. I kept having to say, "No, we are doing just fine. Thanks anyway."

What concerns me the most about your post is that you are drinking Heineken.

[_Ceeboo]

Hey Mad V,

What concerns me the most about your post is that you are drinking Heineken.

I beg your pardon!

(Reporting this pathetic and outrageous post in 3.....2.......1)


Peace,
Ceeboo

[_Doctor Scratch]

Ugh. The OP is yet another reminder of the various ways that the Church can be creepy and invasive.

[_Mad Viking]

Hey Mad V,

What concerns me the most about your post is that you are drinking Heineken.

I beg your pardon!

(Reporting this pathetic and outrageous post in 3.....2.......1)


Peace,
Ceeboo

Horse filtered toilet water.

;)

But seriously, Heineken is foul.

[_Runtu]

Horse filtered toilet water.

;)

But seriously, Heineken is foul.

I thought Heineken was just Dutch Coors.

[_Yoda]

That's not what I said at all, Stem.

Here, I'll make it easier for you. What I'm saying is, just after you've met with the Bishop about no longer believing the church is true, and right afterword some couple in the ward takes an unusual interest in you and takes it upon themselves to be your "friend," 100% of the time that's an assignment from the bishop. It isn't genuine. They're trying to manipulate you back into activity.

You had said they'd only pretend to be your friend 100% of the time. That's questioning motives. That's why I said what I did.

Stem...I think I may understand what you are trying to say here. Even though, in the scenario listed, the couple may have been assigned by the bishop to befriend the inactive family, that doesn't necessarily mean that genuine friendship wouldn't develop. And, that genuine friendship would not be simply a matter of manipulation, but rather, based on real feelings.

[_sock puppet]

I think the OP situation is unfortunate for all the players, but propelled by 'programs' the Church has in place. The member at church told the bishop, who likely did not want to go to the quark home anyway but felt obligated. quark's my wife felt uncomfortable. quark did not like that they were there.

What a cluster ----.

From running across inactives on my mission and in assigned efforts to home teach some inactives before and for a short time after my mission, I never came across one inactive that did not know where some local Mormon ward house was, and which day of the week Sunday is. How can a bishop that has never met the quarks before, goes due to duty/assignment to the quark home have genuine concern for the quarks when there on Sunday? How can the quark family feel comfortable having these strangers that they only have familiarity with their church positions in their home saying the things that were said, if the bishop was crying?

This was not a good scene. Yet I am sure the member at the new ward who told the bishop, the old ward's bishop's wife who told the new ward's bishop what she did no the phone, and the new ward's bishop all honestly thought they were doing what the Church wanted--because it is my understanding that is what the COB wanted each of these three LDS players to do. I feel for these three, and for the quarks whose privacy and home were disrupted.

[_Doctor Scratch]

Horse filtered toilet water.

;)

But seriously, Heineken is foul.

Is somebody going to quote Blue Velvet, or what?

[_quark]

my wife has already developed a sincere relationship with this woman in the ward. Our son and hers play together. That said, my wife was surprised to find this friend went to the bishop after church and told him where our records were hiding and some of our history. my wife commented to me later on, "She always stressed the point to me that she was a very liberal Mo and didn't care where we ended up."

While I believe the friendships are often sincere, I find that the deep-rooted zeal to convert tends to sour the relationships a bit.