Your strangest Bible Passage

[Doctor CamNC4Me]

The pitch was good, Doc. Huck musta missed the sign.

I think Brigham Young was wrong about Jesus conception.

How old was Mary when she was told by an angel that Jehovah chose her and was going to impregnate her?



- Doc

[IHAQ]

I think Brigham Young was wrong about Jesus conception.

Why?

[IHAQ]

“If two men are fighting and the wife of one of them comes to rescue her husband from his assailant, and she reaches out and seizes him by his private parts, you shall cut off her hand. Show her no pity” (Deut. 25:11-12)

"But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence." (1 Timothy 2:12)

The God of the Bible seems very similar to the societal norms of the era when the Bible was initially penned...it's almost as if the writers were seeking to ingratiate themselves by writing things that would make the abusive leaders seem divinely justified.

[Everybody Wang Chung]

I think it’s interesting that almost immediately after freeing the Israelites from the cruelty and horror of bondage, God immediately sanctions slavery among the Israelites and institutes extremely bizarre rules and regulations for keeping slaves.

If I didn’t know any better it would almost appear that the Israelites were just trying to use their God/religion to justify keeping slaves for themselves. After all, it’s okay for us to own slaves because we are the chosen people.

How much pain, evil, misery and suffering could God have prevented if he would have just included “Thou Shall Not Keep Slaves” in the Ten Commandments? Instead, God does the exact opposite.

44 As for your male and female slaves whom you may have: you may buy male and female slaves from among the nations that are around you.

45 You may also buy from among the strangers who sojourn with you and their clans that are with you, who have been born in your land, and they may be your property.

46 You may bequeath them to your sons after you to inherit as a possession forever. You may make slaves of them, but over your brothers the people of Israel you shall not rule, one over another ruthlessly. Leviticus 25:44-46

20 When a man strikes his slave, male or female, with a rod and the slave dies under his hand, he shall be avenged. 21 But if the slave survives a day or two, he is not to be avenged, for the slave is his money. Exodus 21:20-21

[dastardly stem]

The Old Testament is full of crappy old stories that end up condemning God. It's easy pickin's on this. As others have pointed out the New Testament is not much better. I turn to chapter 10 of Matthew's gospel:

Jesus tells the twelve to go out and preach the gospel while healing the sick, raising the dead and casting out devils. No one was recorded doing any of that. Jesus' own stories of miracle healings and raising are suspect themselves. He tells his 12 special characters to seek out the "worthy" and those who aren't worthy shall be worse off than those of Sodom and Gomorrha when judgment comes. Setting up, clearly, the ultimate move to create "us vs them" mentalities in his devoted followers. Additionally here, in this passage, he's supporting the silly story in the Old Testament that some might wish would just go away. Jesus actually loves the stories of God destroying, apparently. The old apologetic of God didn't really do or want to do bad things...it was just old people pretending God wanted it done is problematic for Jesus. Perhaps such a thinking means they too aren't "worthy" and would be better off, I suppose, as having never lived. Well, mind you, that's certainly not what I think, that just happens to be what Jesus teaches.

He carries on telling them if they go about preaching people will persecute them, which like their supposed miracles we have no record of, and they will be brought before kings and governors which we have no record of. he tells them in their rebellion to remember: "And fear not them which kill the body, but are not able to kill the soul: but rather fear him which is able to destroy both soul and body in hell" Manipulating them not through love or goodness, but through fear. When people tell me Jesus must have been a lovely chap, I wonder what they are thinking since he wasn't.

Jesus to his 12, "Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword". Peace is silly, he thinks. Killing and mutilating, as the Old Testament suggests, is the way to go. He will destroy both body and spirit one day, at least for the many.

Toying with their emotions more: "He that loveth father or mother more than me is not worthy of me: and he that loveth son or daughter more than me is not worthy of me." yes, apparently, Jesus thinks it's good to upset and destroy families for the sake of loving him more than others. Who, in their right mind, would ever require someone to love them more than any others? And yet this guy is the one who wishes people follow him.

Invoking his future cross: "And he that taketh not his cross, and followeth after me, is not worthy of me." Again, I suppose in referencing his future cross, predicting the future of his mortal demise, he tells people they must seek to be worthy of him, by also taking on themselves the burden of dying on a cross. None of them were so persecuted.

Granted gang raping a woman to death is about as bad as we can imagine, but there are times when God wants to murder everyone. As soon as he murders everyone save a few he turns on some of the survivors for silly reasons. That's all bad, but it appears Jesus condones all of that. And he adds to that looking forward to the day of Judgment wherein he gets to destroy both body and soul because he deems them as not loving him enough. He enjoys the sword as a tool of destruction among the wicked and hopes families get all ruined and destroyed, apparently, in hopes a few people will love him more than anyone or anything else. And they have no choice. If they don't do as he instructs, only he has power, apparently, to destroy them or hurt them in the worst way possible. "oh you actually love your child more than me? Than ME? Seriously can't wait to see you destroyed."

I mean the entire message, the overall thrust of the Bible rests on terrible atrocity. Why should we try and pick something good out of it and treat it as divine simply because we can find something good? The bad seems to overwhelm the bad, as often is the case.

[huckelberry]

I think Brigham Young was wrong about Jesus conception.

Why?

Spurces closest to the time report the conception did not involve sexual relations. If they are mistaken it would be most likely Joseph as father. I do not think God has a physical body. I am in general doubtful about Brigham Youngs speculative thought.

[dastardly stem]

Why?

Spurces closest to the time report the conception did not involve sexual relations. If they are mistaken it would be most likely Joseph as father. I do not think God has a physical body. I am in general doubtful about Brigham Youngs speculative thought.

Could God punch me in the face? If not could he hurt me as if he punched me in the face? if so how would that be any different then him actually punching me in the face? If he can impregnate a lady without a body and yet the effect is as if the lady had intercourse without her permission does that equate to rape? Or do we do the safe thing and think the Bible is lying and conclude Joseph had sex with Mary? If so, how does that make Jesus godly? As it was his story had to fit in with the times--and any godly character had to have a deified parent. Perhaps. Sadly it seems the Bible leaves us with too many questions. Seems so much more likely that none of it is true...it's myth developed and pulled and thrown together from various places.

[huckelberry]

and Mary said "Behold I am the handmaiden of the Lord, let it be done to me according to your word."

[Doctor CamNC4Me]

and Mary said "Behold I am the handmaiden of the Lord, let it be done to me according to your word."

Do you actually believe an uneducated Levantine middle-age-era 12 or 13 year old could consent to a god?



- Doc

[dastardly stem]

and Mary said "Behold I am the handmaiden of the Lord, let it be done to me according to your word."

Do you actually believe an uneducated Levantine middle-age-era 12 or 13 year old could consent to a god?

- Doc

If an 8 year old can…. I’m agree with you though…that’s rape. It’d be rape if she were grown since a god showing up and impregnating a mortal doesn’t seem to be anything less than that. Says the unseeable ghost “I shall put inside you a male’s sperm and force it to rightfully seed your eggs….oh you don’t know what I’m talking about…well, just sit still this’ll take some focus on my part.”

A bodiless non entity showing up and impregnating a woman is nothing short of magic. but more likely, as huckelberry says, she got pregnant by a boy and is trying to save herself from death or some other punishment by pretending it was god, since god fathering magical kids was the stuff of legend. Imaging a mom telling her kid he was a magical god his whole life might be just the thing needed for him to think everyone needs to love him more than anyone else…or else.