Ah, isn't the LDS church wonderful?

[_solomarineris]

With a son turning 8 in a few weeks, it's baptism time in the Who Knows household. So with that, brings the wonderful experience of the sobbing parents - since daddy isn't doing the baptism, and grandpa (my dad) is, instead. The joyous times of christmas and the new year are behind us. It's time, instead, to focus on the tragedy that is Who Knows' loss of faith, and dissapointment to his family.

Isn't the LDS church wonderful?

Don't feel bad, Who Knows......
Being on sideline sucks, even for a phoney ceremony.
Many of us traversed the same path of being "UNWORTHY". So, I have few years on you, now when I reminisce those two boys baptism with my ex-wife, the pain is not there anymore. (It's been 17yrs).
Things will turn allright eventually.
Just remember; you are bigger and more virtuous guy than any of them priesthood-holders.

[_wenglund]

Wade, dear -

The problem is that you are so completely transparent. You imagine yourself some sort of Dr. Phil - at times overtly imagine yourself Dr. Phil - but you're simply parroting trite phrases as if they're pregnant with meaning.

People usually come here to vent their frustrations in a "safe" place - a place where their families and believing friends are NOT. They don't come here to be psychoanalyzed by a believer whose own issues have been fairly apparent in the past, and who has an obvious agenda. (the agenda: to shift all "blame" and - even - responsibility - away from the LDS church, or LDS believers, and place the blame - and - even - responsibility - squarely on the shoulders of exmormons).

While I appreciate your own ironic attempt at pschoanalyzing me and what I supposedly imagine myself to be and what my supposed agenda is (as well as why people may come here), as the ultimate authority for what I imagine myself to be and what my so-called "agenda" is, I can confidently say once again that you are manifestly incorrect.

For the umpteenth time, please do try and let each person speak for themselves.

I understand that this kindly and reasonable suggestion may run counter to your pathology. But, I am confident that with considerable practice, even you will be able to manage it. ;-)

Sometimes other people's behavior just sucks, and plainly recognizing and stating that the behavior just plain sucks is the healthiest thing to do.

I may not use the word "sucks" in reference to behaviors like putting words into other people's mouth, but I am attempting to address that dysfunctional behavior in a healthy way. Is it necessary that I vent and use the words like "sucks" in order for you to feel "safe" and not dismissive?

Thanks, -Wade Englund-

[_solomarineris]

And for you TBM's out there - YES - the only reason I'm going through all this bullcrap is so I can drink beer. Where's the 'rolleyes' smilie?

Which beer? Methinks that this bullcrap may not be worth it, depending on the beer of course.

Dude,
If you drink beer and tolerated on MADD boards, it is unfair....
All along I thought you were this funky clean LDS guy....( still don't think i'm wrong )

[_beastie]

I know, wade, I know. You're just looking out for all of us, and think we would all be healthier if we just admitted that our current familial dysfunctions are our responsibility alone, and the LDS church is a great institution that cannot fairly be faulted or held responsible in any way. I know you have our own "best interests" at heart.

[_wenglund]

Who Knows, I'm not sure what to tell you. The Mormons here are going to blame you, as they do with any family member who they shun from their multi-million dollar temples.

I have yet to see any of us LDS on this thread do as you pre-accuse us. In fact, not only have I not done so, but I also fully intend not to blame. So, as suggested to Beastie and others, please do try not to put words into our mouths, and let each person speak for themself.

However, in terms of shunning and blame, I offer your ironic statement below for consideration:

We are unkempt, unclean - unworthy in their eyes because, well, if you don't tow the party line and write that monthly check - you're under the guidance of Satan.

Personally I will never step foot inside a Mormon Cult building again - ever, not even Temple Square. It is bad enough I have to work in a building owned by them, with floors dedicated to their madness, or eat in their food courts, or walk the streets they've bought with money they've leached from long dead followers.

My wife is LDS but she knows I will never give permission for blessings or baptisms. I will not have my children indoctrinated in the Cult of the Mormon God - a God whose pyramid starts with Money.

I've watched Ex-Mormonism for years and I'm afraid that once you leave the Cult - the mentality is that you are now on the outside, and that is how you will be perceived. The Cult teaches members to choose it over family members, and this is why I believe the divorce rate among those who leave the Cult is over 80%. Every week on RFM, PM or the EXMF there is at least someone who is in the process of divorce - sometimes fueled by self-righteous Cult leaders pushing the member to separate.

I'm sorry that you feel alone. The Cult has indoctrinated family members around you into believing you are the problem. You are the one who isn't obeying the Mormon God. They can't fathom why because they're still part of the mindset. I think this is the hardest part for Ex-Mormons to deal with. All of the smug, back stabbing, looking down-their-noses at you as if you're some kind of heathen.

I asked you to consider the irony of your above statement, not with the intent to blame, but with the intent of helping you help yourself. Are you familiar with the term "projection"? Is it possible that that is what you just did? (Lest there be some confusion, I am asking, not telling. I will be more than happy to accept what you decide in terms of self-perception.)

Just look at the assholes here like Wade, and the tag-alongs Bourne and Nehor. Smugness ... "What are YOU going to do to change things..." What an ass, Wade. Typical Mormon b***s***.

This is the first time I have heard perfectly innocent QUESTIONS referred to as "smugness" and "b***s***". Do you feel the same way about equally innocent questions like: "What's up?" or "What are you doing?" or "What's your plans?" Do you consider anyone to be "asshole" who asks those kinds of questions of someone else?

I am just trying to understand your thinking.

Thanks, -Wade Englund-

[_wenglund]

I know, wade, I know. You're just looking out for all of us, and think we would all be healthier if we just admitted that our current familial dysfunctions are our responsibility alone, and the LDS church is a great institution that cannot fairly be faulted or held responsible in any way. I know you have our own "best interests" at heart.

I am sorry, but you are once again mistakely putting words into my mouth. Care to try again? (May I suggest as a viable alternative that you try speaking for yourself about yourself for a change? I trust that is a subject you actually know something about and have some authoritative say therein, and are thus less likely to be persistently wrong about.)

Thanks, -Wade Englund-

[_beastie]

No, wade, I don't care to try again. I don't take you seriously enough to try again. As I said, I view you as a Dr. Phil wannabe who parrots trite phrases and pretends they're pregnant with significance. It's your latest (of many) obsessions, and about as worthwhile, in my view, as the rest of them.

[_Tori]

And for you TBM's out there - YES - the only reason I'm going through all this bullcrap is so I can drink beer. Where's the 'rolleyes' smilie?

Hmmm....same here...kinda. The ONLY reason I don't believe anymore is so I can have sleepover's with BishopRic. ;-)!

[_Inconceivable]

I suggest you go mad. Run through the streets naked throwing rocks at mailboxes and accusing trees of bestiality. After that, I doubt not baptizing your children will be a major issue.

For added fun, wear a funny hat while doing this.

Who Knows,

1) Maybe you should invite Nehor. Nehor, you wouldn't mind doing a cannonball in the font just to get things started?

Guaranteed, everyone will forget that guys like Who Knows and I are even an issue. You go, gi.. er Nehor.

2) I just tried that "read only a couple words of Wade's" thing. That really works. Thanks.

Infymus,

You got some real issues that someday you'll be better off letting go of. Until then, thanks for your contribution, I feel like your points were dead-on.

[_Tori]

I hear your dramatic appeal...

Same old wade. I ignored everything after those first 5 words. Sorry, try again if you'd like.

I appreciate the second chance--particularly since I believe you well worth it.

Perhaps if I use some of your own words, you may be less inclined to ignore what comes thereafter. So let me phrase it this way: Given the wonderful way you described your pending situation, what plans are you making to improve things for yourself and others over the next few weeks?

Thanks, -Wade Englund-

I'm kinda puzzled what you mean here, Wade. Just what would you propose he do?

This is one of the things that is so irritating about the Church. The way a father is ostracized because he is deemed 'unworthy'.

I was married for 22 years to someone that was also 'unworthy'. He didn't bless, baptize, or confirm any of my children. I had family members or a Bishop do the deed and at that time I saw nothing wrong with that. I had no idea how it affected my husband and how he felt.

I remember when my daughter was born, it was shortly before my father died. We had the whole family together so we blessed her at the family dinner after the funeral. I asked my Bishop if we could do that and told him that my Brother-in-law would do the blessing and he was a 1st counselor in a BR so it should be OK. My other daughter was blessed at Church on Fast Sunday and my husband was able to stand in the circle and hold her as her father. I just assumed he would be able to do the same thing this time around. Somewhere in the 6 years between the two...the rules changed. He couldn't be any where near the circle. The counselor from my Bishpric had my husband stand outside the Circle, while the worthy relatives stood in it and gave my daughter a blessing.

I can't believe that I thought that was OK! I've talked with my ex-husband about this and he told me how humiliating it was for him. I feel terrible about that, now.

The thing is, I didn't see it then. I thought I was doing the right and proper thing because my kids just had to be blessed the Mormon way. Active LDS automatically think that the father just needs to get worthy. Ridiculous.