After over 2 years, the wife is finally done with it.

[_Sam Harris]

It is strange because my brother was baptised after both my parents leaving. None of my family believe. I am kinda the only one, but confused, maybe I could look at those sites. My parents never went through the temple, my mum didn't want to be married to my dad for ever, but she once said to me that she would like that I got her sealed to us. I didn't know if I could do that, but I would never get my parents sealed after they had gone because I wouldn't want that for my mum. She confuses me at times, because sometimes she says things that say she believes then she says the complete opposite other times. WK, didn't your son get baptised recently? How would that bear on your son? My mum told me she never wants me to wear "Gs" ( I will use that just incase it is sensitive in this forum) I think she feels it takes away womens power, I tried telling her, men wear them too. She things it is too much like Islam symbolically. I spent the last ten minutes wondering why my noodles are spicy, I must have got the wrong kind.
I bet wearing them in bed would be a right turn off. LOL.

Have fun. If it makes you both happy then it is cool. Life is relative in my opinion.

With regards to the bold part, neither did mine, LOL. Took me a long time to get over it, then I grew up and learned about their behaviorisms, and decided that if Dad was alive, and the two of them were to get romantic again, I'd have to shoot them both.

They were definitely better off separated. Derailment done. :-P

[_bcspace]

Well, it might gratify BCSpace to know I was one of those brave souls who jumped into my apostasy with both feet. *kerplunk*

I am gratified. God is too (Revelation 3:15-16).

[_Chap]

LOL!

What a bunch of agony prolonging cowards.

Again - why "cowards"? These people love their spouses, and don't want to lose them. So they take it gently, in the hope that the spouse will eventually feel safe joining them outside the CoJCoLDS.

Sounds both loving, and wise to me.

So why "cowards", bcspace? Did you just lose your cool for a moment, or what?

[_Yoda]

BC, in light of your answer to PP's question on the other thread, I think I understand your answer here in a little bit different context.

You stated that if your wife came to you and said, "I don't believe in the Church anymore" that you would not leave her. You would stay with her because you love her. If she wanted a divorce, you would grant one, but you wouldn't leave her.

Coming from that stance, you think it is silly, or even cowardice to hide from someone you love how you truly feel about something so important, because, in your mind, the choice is simple. The bond between the couple should be strong enough to withstand it, so why bother skulking around and hiding?

Hopefully, however, you can also recognize that admitting you are seeing an entire way of life differently is scary. It is especially scary when that spouse who you are so connected with and care so much about, is still wrapped up in those old beliefs.

From what I know of WK's situation, I don't think he acted in a cowardice way. He was up front with his wife about his feelings regarding the Church. He didn't hide anything.

At the same time, however, he was not hostile toward his wife, her attitude toward the Church, or her beliefs. As a matter of fact, he continued to support her in her callings by helping out with the kids when needed, etc. He didn't push his views on her, but allowed her to discover for herself what would be best for their situation.

[_Coggins7]

LOL!

What a bunch of agony prolonging cowards.

Indeed, and for me, this is the clincher:

It was like there was a barrier between her faith, and rational thinking.

For whatever its worth, and it may be worth very little, if Whoknows thinks, even for one moment, that this kind of guile ridden, self serving conceit fools someone like me, who has had a life's worth of experience both inside and outside of the Church, having fought, and continuing to fight, for my spiritual life against both internal and external enemies, and who is one of many LDS with a profound love of intellect, education, and the endless quest for knowledge, he is sadly and deeply mistaken.

Its quite possible to think your way out of this Church, but only if you cease praying, communicating with God, and living the commandments in the process. Rational thought is a tool useful for the finding of truth only in the hands of one committed to that task in the first instance, and rational thought is not an oracle; it cannot penetrate beyond its own self imposed perceptual barriers.

Whatever her real reasons for now leaving the Church, please cease with the paeans to rationality and logic. It only makes the pretense the worse for being so transparently narcissistic.

[_Coggins7]

BCSpace, People are here saying it pays off to be patient. What agony is prolonged by waiting for your spouse to see the light?

Toke on dude, toke on...

[_Coggins7]

Spoken like a true condescending son's-a-bitch Mormon penisholding husband! "Follow me woman, or you will be replaced by one that will!"

Perhaps you are jealous that your wife doesn't even own hot panties and a sexy tanktop?

See beecee, the problem with that is that most exmo men typically did not treat their wives like s*** before or after their exit, perhaps due to the fact that most exmo men married their wives for LOVE, not because they were supposed to, K?

And with that course comment from our friend Buggered Cantankerous space I have a question for him and will start a new thread here.

Adulthood is waiting...just around the corner. All you have to do is...grow up.

But perhaps that bar is too high after all.

[_Coggins7]

Seems like there are lots of divorces occurring or occurred because of apostasy. Of course that in and of itself shows how the LDS Church is more committed to those that are members keeping their loyalty to their Church above love and loyalty to their spouses.

Since there is no doctrine or policy in the Church that teaches spouses to divorce because one "falls away" from the Church, do you think you're fooling someone here?

[_Moniker]

Seems like there are lots of divorces occurring or occurred because of apostasy. Of course that in and of itself shows how the LDS Church is more committed to those that are members keeping their loyalty to their Church above love and loyalty to their spouses.

Since there is no doctrine or policy in the Church that teaches spouses to divorce because one "falls away" from the Church, do you think you're fooling someone here?

Yes, I thought I was fooling all... evidently my trickery doesn't work well on you! You're too damn clever to fall for my Satanic ruse!

[_Chap]

LOL!

What a bunch of agony prolonging cowards.

Indeed, and for me, this is the clincher:

It was like there was a barrier between her faith, and rational thinking.

For whatever its worth, and it may be worth very little, if Whoknows thinks, even for one moment, that this kind of guile ridden, self serving conceit fools someone like me, who has had a life's worth of experience both inside and outside of the Church, having fought, and continuing to fight, for my spiritual life against both internal and external enemies, and who is one of many LDS with a profound love of intellect, education, and the endless quest for knowledge, he is sadly and deeply mistaken.

Its quite possible to think your way out of this Church, but only if you cease praying, communicating with God, and living the commandments in the process. Rational thought is a tool useful for the finding of truth only in the hands of one committed to that task in the first instance, and rational thought is not an oracle; it cannot penetrate beyond its own self imposed perceptual barriers.

Whatever her real reasons for now leaving the Church, please cease with the paeans to rationality and logic. It only makes the pretense the worse for being so transparently narcissistic.

There is something almost noble about this post. It is indeed possible, if you are prepared to devote enough effort, to continue to maintain belief in propositions that are just plain implausible, and are against which there is a large amount of fairly obvious evidence: the Soviet Union is the world's most advanced democracy, the Fuhrer is leading us to victory, a pilgrimage to Lourdes will cure my cancer, Amway is the path to riches, my husband still loves me even though he beats me up, the universe is under the control of a loving and merciful deity who listens to prayer... and so on.

When we meet people who run their lives on this kind of basis, it is usually better not to argue. Indeed, one sometimes does not want to say anything to disturb the structures they maintain at such a great cost - does one want to make them think they really have wasted their lives on a lie? But when someone praises themselves as does the poster above:

... me, who has had a life's worth of experience both inside and outside of the Church, having fought, and continuing to fight, for my spiritual life against both internal and external enemies, and who is one of many LDS with a profound love of intellect, education, and the endless quest for knowledge ...

and then calls anybody else 'transparently narcissistic' for regarding rationality as important ... well, they look so ridiculous that there is no need for anyone else to mock or parody them, even if one wanted to.