The Cultural Hall Run-Around

[_MsJack]

It was my husband doing most of the calling, why me, and he didn't say a word about the fact that he was marrying a non-member and we were holding the wedding in a Protestant church. I didn't even say that on most of my phone calls; I only mentioned that we were BYU students and could not use our own cultural hall for the reception.

Bottom line, the building coordinators were saying "no" to a fellow faithful and active member, not a Protestant. You're just scrambling for excuses now that your fish story about holding the wedding in a Mormon chapel has been shown to be unlikely.

Third, you expect the LDS ward to get volunteers to move the chairs, set up tables, organize the electrical equipment for your wedding reception.

Um, no. My own people did all of the setting up and take-down at my reception, and they made sure to leave the room cleaner than they found it. I expected nothing from the ward that hosted us except the keys to the building, which were promptly returned after we were finished.

And was your wedding reception alcohol free and could that be assured to the satisfaction of the Mormon bishop? Probably not. And what about smoking? Do any of your wide range of friends smoke? And where would they be smoking?

Of course it was alcohol-free and smoke-free, bigot. I was a BYU student and the wedding was attended by at least a dozen professors.

who is basically antimormon who is married to a seemlngly inactive husband

I'm not an anti-Mormon and my husband was not and is not inactive. He holds a temple recommend, pays his tithing, and kept the "law of chastity" prior to marriage. Things about life as a Mormon that you know nothing about.

No, Jack, The wards were right to refuse you. Much better to pay for the protestant cultural hall or go to a local organization that has premises for such events. No sponging on the Mormons.

It's a good thing my pastor didn't demonstrate the same bigotry against Mormons as you've demonstrated against Protestants here on this thread. I would have been appalled if he had told me that he didn't trust my husband because he was a Mormon and I should go use Mormon facilities for the wedding ceremony and stop "sponging" on the Assemblies of God.

[_MsJack]

But it seems a big risk to have people who may agree with MsJack about Mormonism and the Mormons to have free run of not only the cultural hall but of the church premises in general

Photograph from the actual reception of some of the dangerous people who were given free run of the cultural hall at MsJack's reception.

[_why me]

I'm not an anti-Mormon and my husband was not and is not inactive. He holds a temple recommend, pays his tithing, and kept the "law of chastity" prior to marriage. Things about life as a Mormon that you know nothing about.

I have read a lot of negative posts by you about the Mormon church. I haven't seen many positive posts written by you. So, basing my opinion by what I have read, I can say that you are not promormon. But, yes, I could be wrong. But going by your posts, I perhaps can say that you are not very positive about the LDS church.

[_why me]

I think she said it was to save money and that they were students at BYU. The term anti-mormon really feels uncomfortable when used in this sense and seems unfair to both MsJack and her husband.

I have no idea about her husband. But going by MsJack's posts about Mormonism, can we say that she is 'critically inclined' toward Mormonism and the Mormons? Would that be a better choice of words?

[_MsJack]

I have read a lot of negative posts by you about the Mormon church. I haven't seen many positive posts written by you. So, basing my opinion by what I have read, I can say that you are not promormon. But, yes, I could be wrong. But going by your posts, I perhaps can say that you are not very positive about the LDS church.

This forum is not the only place where I discuss LDS topics. I don't doubt that my posts here tend towards the critical, but that's because most of the threads here (which usually aren't originated by me) are critical to begin with. Even so, there have been numerous places on this forum where I have defended the LDS church from critical charges or disagreed on the significance of criticisms leveled against it. Hardly "anti-Mormon" behavior.

My blog runs a much wider spectrum of critical to neutral to positive, which is why most of my readers are believing Mormons themselves. I don't consider myself "anti-Mormon" or "pro-Mormon." I'm neutral.

Or in other words, yes, you are wrong. Yet again.

I have no idea about her husband.

If you have no idea about my husband, then you should probably stop calling him things like "anti-Mormon" and "seemingly inactive."

[_honorentheos]

MsJack -

I hope this isn't too much of a tangent but I thought it relates to the general theme of your thread.

Last night my wife, daughter,and I attended a wedding and reception for a friend (the bride) who is not LDS. The minister who performed the wedding was a lady. I'm not sure of the denomination as our friend is catholic and I am not sure of her husband's faith.

What interested me was that, during the ceremony and after the bride and groom had said, "I will" to the formal vows, the minister then engaged the entire audience at the wedding as witnesses. I don't remember all of the words, but in effect we were asked, as witnesses to the marriage, to not only ascent to it but to enter into a promise to support their marriage, not interfere with their relationship, and something to the effect of doing all in our power to build it up and ensure it lasted. We were asked to confirm this, saying "We will", similar to the bride and grooms promise to one another.

I found this act of communal covenant very interesting and I don't think there is anything like it in LDS marriage. All covenants in LDS marriage are between God and the couple. Until last night, I had never thought about marriage as having a broader communal covenant that should be there somewhere.

Perhaps if LDS were to work the words, "What God has joined, let no man put asunder" back into their view of marriage, wedding receptions might be viewed with a little more priority. Instead, I believe the emphasis is always placed on the couple's faithfulness.

By the way, do you know if this is a common practice in other faith traditions and their weddings? I had never seen it before but I've only attended a few non-LDS weddings.

[_why me]

MsJack -

Last night my wife, daughter,and I attended a wedding and reception for a friend (the bride) who is not LDS. The minister who performed the wedding was a lady. I'm not sure of the denomination as our friend is catholic and I am not sure of her husband's faith.

Maybe your friend is catholic only in name. Most catholics would not be married by a pastor and certainly not by a pastor who is a woman. But then again, if her wedding is not recognized by the catholic church she can get an annulment if it doesn't work out and be free to marry again.

[_Jersey Girl]

why me

Maybe your friend is catholic only in name. Most catholics would not be married by a pastor and certainly not by a pastor who is a woman. But then again, if her wedding is not recognized by the catholic church she can get an annulment if it doesn't work out and be free to marry again.

After how many years can you get an annulment? I'm married to a Catholic Jersey Boy who got married in my Protestant church 30+ years ago.

I'm thinking about unloading him now.
;-)

[_MrStakhanovite]

Someone clue me in...

Why would Condoms be at a wedding reception?

Probably balloons.

Bob doesn't know the difference, I guess.

But seriously…WTF.

If they are for the bride and groom, wouldn’t bride be on birth control already? If not, wouldn’t the bride and groom take the condoms with them?

If they are a gag gift, a gift to whom? What is funny about a married couple having sex? If it is a gag gift for the wedding party, wouldn’t that be a bit more offensive?

Seriously, this is confusing the hell out of me, why would there be condoms left lying around the cultural hall after a reception? It doesn’t make any sense what so ever.

[_honorentheos]

Someone clue me in...

Why would Condoms be at a wedding reception?

Probably balloons.

Bob doesn't know the difference, I guess.

But seriously…WTF.

Call me crazy but in my limited experience, condoms found by the cleaning crew at a wedding meant someone was there looking to hook up and succeeded. Given that Yahoo suggested alcohol was involved I'd say this sound well within the realm of possibilities. I've been to one or two such wedding parties. Not at an LDS ward house, but that may be something unique to So-Cal. There ARE a lot of unused empty rooms at ward houses after all.

I think Bot's gripe is more with the non-LDS behavior that he apparently witnessed or found evidence for and the response reflects the typical approach many Mormon's take to this "problem" - isolationism.