Elder Holland shares 'the missionary speech of all time'

[_consiglieri]

I seem to recall that Lynn Bryson back in the 1980's went around from stake to stake with his firesides about Satan and rock-and-roll and back-masking, and how he wrote a song for a Hanna-Barbera cartoon that got stolen from him and he never got paid.

One of his stories had to do with a Mormon missionary and a biker from a bike gang.

I don't remember the details of that story, and I can't find it on google, but my Spider-sense is tingling a bit.

All the Best!

--Consiglieri

[_Lemmie]

Speaking of Consig's and Bill's stories and the thread Craig referred to, I noticed Juliann also inadvertently adds to the urban legend quality of the story with this:

My family history has a similar story, actually. A 14 year old went off to work in another city because of the family's poverty. The family moved and she didn't get the memo. She ended up marrying very young because she was on her own. Later in life, she was sitting on her porch (smoking a pipe, I come from Hatfield and McCoy country in one line) and missionaries came by. One turned out to be her brother. The family was reunited. 

to which another poster adds this:

I read one account similar to this in a book by Elder Gerald Lund about a missionary in Brazil that gets sent to a mission in Brazil and If I recall correctly the first door they knock on is some long lost sibling. I find some stories easier to believe than others. 

and finally, going back full circle to Holland's version, this:

This is not the first time this story has been told, so I have to believe it is the truth and actually happened (with a few differences in the details when told).  

Yes, because how many times a story is told and how many differences there eventually are adds to its truthfulness. We should submit this to the Faith Promoting Rumor blog: The Chronicling of an Urban Legend. Or at least send it to that Holy Fetch page, don't they list Mormon stories ?

[_consiglieri]

Yes, because how many times a story is told and how many differences there eventually are adds to its truthfulness. We should submit this to the Faith Promoting Rumor blog: The Chronicling of an Urban Legend. Or at least send it to that Holy Fetch page, don't they list Mormon stories ?

I just saw this comment over at MAD Board and thought, "That has got to be the dumbest thing I have ever heard."

[_Craig Paxton]

The entire story smells like a huge pile of Mormon bull crap...and unless someone stands up and takes responsibility for this story caulk full of Faith Promoting coincidences it will remain in the bull crap category as far as I'm concerned. While a story like this is not outside the realms of random possibility...that Holland can not consistently tell the same story and that it seems to get better and more faith promoting with each new telling...make the story suspect....and why can't they nail the story down and give names and dates. And what's with Hollands obsession with tattoos? I mean who gives a damn if the dude (if real) likes ink...having a tattoo does not make a person good or bad...yet another reason I'm calling this story bull crap.

Jeffrey, put up or shut up...this is a false story until you provide evidence to support it.

EDIT To Add: And why is this the best they have to offer to support their truth claims...out of the 10's of thousands of parents prayer for their child's return to the church...you would think there would be literally thousands of this kind of prayer being answered by God and there would be thousands of way ward children returning to the fold...but no...only this one isolated suspect story repeated over and over and altered with each re telling...bull crap

[_I have a question]

...and finally, going back full circle to Holland's version, this:

This is not the first time this story has been told, so I have to believe it is the truth and actually happened (with a few differences in the details when told).  

Yes, because how many times a story is told and how many differences there eventually are adds to its truthfulness. We should submit this to the Faith Promoting Rumor blog: The Chronicling of an Urban Legend. Or at least send it to that Holy Fetch page, don't they list Mormon stories ?

I refer you to my signature line...

[_I have a question]

The only thing they've learned from Paul H. Dunn is to put the tale in the third person, thereby insulating oneself from the accusation of outright lying.

[_Craig Paxton]

Unsurprisingly, my TBM family have taken this story as the gospel truth...Hook, Line and Sinker

[_candygal]

Yes, because how many times a story is told and how many differences there eventually are adds to its truthfulness. We should submit this to the Faith Promoting Rumor blog: The Chronicling of an Urban Legend. Or at least send it to that Holy Fetch page, don't they list Mormon stories ?

I just saw this comment over at MAD Board and thought, "That has got to be the dumbest thing I have ever heard."

I agree. Don't ya know consig that everybody in this story started on the wrong road ...made a left turn and should have went right. The guy ends in California..a biker...and his missionary bro is on a bike going down the right road...when he should have took the wrong road..but paused and listened to a voice after prayer..and returned to the right road..where his brother was lost. The only thing right about this story is the damn dogs! And heck...we are not even sure about that!

[_Lemmie]

...and finally, going back full circle to Holland's version, this:

This is not the first time this story has been told, so I have to believe it is the truth and actually happened (with a few differences in the details when told).  

Yes, because how many times a story is told and how many differences there eventually are adds to its truthfulness. We should submit this to the Faith Promoting Rumor blog: The Chronicling of an Urban Legend. Or at least send it to that Holy Fetch page, don't they list Mormon stories ?

I refer you to my signature line...

Hah!! "Authoritarian institutions and marketers have always known this...." Perfect.

[_I have a question]

Dear Elder Holland, if God can miraculously save a Hells Angel....how come this happened...?

ST. GEORGE — The investigation into the death of a 2-year-old boy left in a hot car for at least six hours remains open as officials await autopsy results, according to the Washington County Sheriff's Office.

A funeral for Abraham Royal was held Thursday in the boy's hometown of Preston, Idaho, according to his obituary.

Abraham was found deceased in the back seat of "a coach-style van" about 6:30 p.m. on June 24 in the Winchester Hills subdivision near St. George, the sheriff's office said in a prepared statement earlier this week.

Detectives said that based on interviews with witnesses and family members, the child had been in the car for at least six hours when he was found.

According to the sheriff's office, several families from out of state were attending a family reunion when Abraham died. The reunion consisted of more than five families and 25 to 30 children, the sheriff's office said.

The families had traveled to St. George using multiple vehicles. When they returned to the Winchester Hills area, the adults prepared "for a religious meeting" in St. George, according to the statement.

http://www.ksl.com/?sid=44837914&nid=1417