(some!!!!) Mormon & exmormon men and the internet

[_beastie]

Yeah, I live in the South, too. NC to be specific, and the red necks here are very different from the red necks up in Washington state where I was born and raised. By 'red neck' I really just mean ill-mannered, non-cultured, narrow-minded-ish, or some such variation. You're right that no one really ever fits a specific stereotype, but sometimes stereotypes are useful to get a general idea across.

gotcha!

[_beastie]

That you get excited about it makes me think you haven't. :)

I admit this is usually my first suspicion as well.

[_asbestosman]

Here's the thing, will. It's been a while since I've been a Mormon, but I'm pretty sure the Mormon church didn't condone acting in flirtatious, suggestive manners with women other than your wife. In fact, I seem to remember them stressing even staying away from the appearance of "evil".

Or is that another teaching that has changed?

Not as far as I can tell. I don't flirt with anyone but my wife. I might jokingly "flirt" with a guy, but it should be obvious that I'm joking. I also believe in potty humor although I probably shouldn't. Still, I think flirting with the opposite sex is a bad idea (unless it's with your spouse).

[_marg]

Yes, I've noticed it only on primarily LDS boards and only from LDS or ex-LDS men.

Ok. Look, I think this means something. Moniker, Jersey Girl, and myself did NOT grow up LDS. We've all participated on other boards. All three of us have noticed something unique to LDS and exLDS male/female interactions.

I'm not sure just what it means yet, but it does make me feel like I haven't imagined this... and, scottie, I'm not trying to get men to stop being men. This has to do with Mormonism, men, and sexuality.

As far as I can see it's your imagination Beastie, and I've been on many different types of boards as well; marriage counseling, pop fan boards, health issue related boards as examples What I see on this particular board are certain women being flirtateous and suggestive. It is as if they think (not that they know) the men have lived a very boring sex existence, which may be true, I don't know, but some women seem to be going out of their way to focus on being flirtatious, suggestive and initiating talk focused on sex. I really don't see the men responding to the set up suggestive talk much if at all, for which they could.

I didn't read your blog Moniker, but you seem to focus much more on sex than any of the posters here, including the men. And you even interpreted JAK as coming onto you, when it was no such thing. If you are getting pm's I suggest you take a look at what you are doing to bring on this attention you apparently don't like. Perhaps it is you being rather naïve.

[_harmony]

Now to harmony's precious remarks:

When I see flirting, sexualized comments, etc., my first reaction is boredom and my second reaction is frustration.

Well, when I see flirting, sexualized comments, etc., my first reaction is: I wonder what she looks like in person? And my second reaction is: thank goodness for Androgel. ;-)

And it really pisses me off when I see people like some of our apologists behaving disrespectfully towards the women here. I realize they think this is a slimepit, but that has no bearing on their responsibility to behave as a Latter-day Saint, instead of a heathen without boundaries. It's embarrassing, it's freakin' embarrassing! Geez... GROW UP! Live up to your priesthood!

Good grief!

Good grief is right!

"A heathen without boundaries." That's hilarious. I mean it's really, really funny. It is only topped by "Live up to your priesthood!"

What in the hell are you talking about?

Is this the same priesthood you so often disparage? The one that comes from the polygamist and alleged pedophiliac Joseph Smith -- the prophet you love to hate? The priesthood you feign to sustain when you are interviewed for a temple recommend?

I thought so.

Now why would you assume I was talking about you, Will? Methinks you doth protest too much.

[_beastie]

Not as far as I can tell. I don't flirt with anyone but my wife. I might jokingly "flirt" with a guy, but it should be obvious that I'm joking. I also believe in potty humor although I probably shouldn't. Still, I think flirting with the opposite sex is a bad idea (unless it's with your spouse).

I was pretty sure this teaching hadn't changed, and it's one I agree with.

Marg -

I'm not just talking about sex talk and flirtatiousness, although that is part of it. Nor am I talking about simply referring to sex in some way.

And it's obvious to me you have no idea what you're talking about in regards to Moniker.

[_marg]

Marg -

I'm not just talking about sex talk and flirtatiousness, although that is part of it. Nor am I talking about simply referring to sex in some way.

Well why don't you make it clear what you are talking about and provide a few examples.

And it's obvious to me you have no idea what you're talking about in regards to Moniker.

What idea are you referring to?

[_harmony]

And it's obvious to me you have no idea what you're talking about in regards to Moniker.

Not at all an unusual circumstance with Marg.

[Guest]

I didn't read your blog Moniker, but you seem to focus much more on sex than any of the posters here, including the men.

You've told me before I'm obsessed with sex. Are you aware that I can be talking about buying boots and men post pictures of me saying they think of me as a seductress? That I get PMs from men on this website. That men have asked me to meet them somewhere and screw? No, you probably weren't aware of that!

I do more posts that are meant to be sexually titillating than KA, Liz, GIMR, Shmo, Scottie, Bond, Will, Bedme(oops) Bednar??? (those are off the top of my head) -- no, I do not!

And you even interpreted JAK as coming onto you, when it was no such thing.

I pointed out to you that JAK asked me about porno when I was talking about art -- it wasn't appropriate. YOU were the one that told Ren he had sexual fantasies about me!

If you are getting pm's I suggest you take a look at what you are doing to bring on this attention you apparently don't like. Perhaps it is you being rather naïve.

I had a blog up and I discussed relationships in my past. I was essentially having a mental breakdown on this board about 8 months ago -- my cogdis broke when I recognized I was in an abusive marriage. Some men on this website were PERVS to me. It bothered me. I can say something and someone will twist it to be sexually suggestive somehow or another. It bothers me. Coggins says crappy things to me often -- and makes up rhymes about me. When I did have my blog up (and the majority of this board was banned) apparently it was passed about that I was a sexual wild thing -- huh? Naw, it was a bunch of moronic men that apparently thought that a woman that was talking about being demeaned by her husband and sorting out whether relationships with men were tinged with being a victim or not meant that I wanted to be approached and have sex with random men on the internet -- newsflash -- I didn't!

[_marg]

And it's obvious to me you have no idea what you're talking about in regards to Moniker.

Not at all an unusual circumstance with Marg.

The proof is in the pudding with regards to Moniker, she's the one getting pm's from men, who apparently think of her as a whore. Are you getting those sorts of pm's Harmony? So why is she getting that sort of response and you aren't. So she's obviously doing something to warrant the sort of responses she's getting off the board. On the board I don't see any of the men behaving inappropriately.