Ammon And His Bag Of Arms

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_The Dude
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Post by _The Dude »

Doctor Steuss wrote:The Book of Mormon is a 19th century production folks. This story obviously has something to do with the second amendment.


LOL Right to bear arms.

When I was a kid we would go to the library in Orem and check out these cool Book of Mormon story books with very colorful drawings of stories like this. (The had gray binding and a golden liahona on the back -- does anyone else know the books I mean?) So the things I imagine of the Ammon story are straight out of the storybook: Ammon's fellow servants took the arms back to the king while Ammon calmly went to feed the king's horses. The servants dragged them in a big bloody sheet, since there were several dozen limbs all cut off at the upper arm or shoulder. Amazing imagery here. But the story as told in the picture books has several problems: flocks of sheep in ancient America? horses? steel swords capable of hacking off warriors' arms at the thickest point? Pure fantasy, inspired, no doubt, but the story of Samson slaying all those Philistines with the jawbone of an ass, but Joseph Smith always had to make his stories better.
"And yet another little spot is smoothed out of the echo chamber wall..." Bond
_Tarski
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Post by _Tarski »

Doctor Steuss wrote:The Book of Mormon is a 19th century production folks. This story obviously has something to do with the second amendment.


LOL LOL LOL !!!
_KimberlyAnn
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Post by _KimberlyAnn »

The Dude wrote: Pure fantasy, inspired, no doubt, but the story of Samson slaying all those Philistines with the jawbone of an ass, but Joseph Smith always had to make his stories better.


I'm not taking anything from Sampson's incredible, yet fictitious, slaughter of men with the jawbone of an ass, but since the beginning of time women have been able to slay men with asses, no jawbone necessary. Sampson figured that one out the hard way.

KA
_Phaedrus Ut
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Post by _Phaedrus Ut »

If Ammon's "sword" was actually a macuahuitl then what were the "clubs" the men had? Corn stalks? Turkey feathers?

Maybe they can redraw the Book of Mormon story illustrations to show Ammon guarding flocks of non-sheep with his non-sword.

Phaedrus
_silentkid
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Post by _silentkid »

The Dude wrote:Pure fantasy, inspired, no doubt, but the story of Samson slaying all those Philistines with the jawbone of an ass, but Joseph Smith always had to make his stories better.


Exactly. It's hilarious how much more over-the-top the stories in the Book of Mormon are when compared to their biblical counterparts. I hadn't made the Samson connection...my Old Testament skills are severely lacking. All the stone slinging reminded me of the David and Goliath story.

Does anyone kow the apologist explanation for Ammon's sword? Was it just a club with obsidian shards? If so, why was it called a sword and not a club? After all, the text notes that his attackers carried clubs.

Edited to add: Sorry Phaedrus...I didn't see your post before I posted mine. Same question.
_silentkid
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Post by _silentkid »

KimberlyAnn wrote:but since the beginning of time women have been able to slay men with asses, no jawbone necessary.


Nice!
_KimberlyAnn
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Post by _KimberlyAnn »

silentkid wrote:Nice!


My ass? Why, yes, it is nice, thank you! I have slain many a man with it. But how do you know? You haven't seen me, Silentkid, but blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed! :P

In jest,

KA

PS - Panties.
_Tarski
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Post by _Tarski »

KimberlyAnn wrote:
silentkid wrote:Nice!


My ass? Why, yes, it is nice, thank you! I have slain many a man with it. But how do you know? You haven't seen me, Silentkid, but blessed are those who have not seen and yet have believed! :P

In jest,

KA

PS - Panties.

I believe too!
_Doctor Steuss
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Post by _Doctor Steuss »

KimberlyAnn wrote:
The Dude wrote: Pure fantasy, inspired, no doubt, but the story of Samson slaying all those Philistines with the jawbone of an ass, but Joseph Smith always had to make his stories better.


I'm not taking anything from Sampson's incredible, yet fictitious, slaughter of men with the jawbone of an ass, but since the beginning of time women have been able to slay men with asses, no jawbone necessary. Sampson figured that one out the hard way.

KA


2 Pet. 2: 16
16 But was rebuked for his iniquity: the dumb ass speaking with man’s voice forbad the madness of the prophet.

It's like a scene from a Jim Carrey movie.
"Some people never go crazy. What truly horrible lives they must lead." ~Charles Bukowski
_SatanWasSetUp
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Post by _SatanWasSetUp »

I forgot what was the king's response when Ammon gave him the basket filled with severed arms? Something like, "Uhhh....gee.....thanks."
"We of this Church do not rely on any man-made statement concerning the nature of Deity. Our knowledge comes directly from the personal experience of Joseph Smith." - Gordon B. Hinckley

"It's wrong to criticize leaders of the Mormon Church even if the criticism is true." - Dallin H. Oaks
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