Safe for children?

[_huckelberry]

I do not claiim to have answer for people dealing with personal doubt in the context of beliving families. I left at 18 and have not turned back. I have asked myself if I can seperate out of list of values I learned in church which should not be left behind and for which I can speak an honest thankyou.

My question is propelled by my own sense that raising children in the church is dangerous and only can be justified by honest belief. Childeren can be presented by severe turmoil trying to identify reality amoungst conflicting views of the church. An uncertain parent may only aggrevate the problem. I can remember a variety teenage disasters LDS teens underwent. They have no safety just being Mormon. A strong LDS family related to a close friend lost a child to heroin. That is a tragedy beyond blame pointing. I do not think it can be simple blamed upon conflicts over what is real. I doubt those conflicst provided safety or guidance.

I knew teens for whom growing up LDS was a hell of a conflict.

Yet I will make my list of what I give thanks that came to me via Mormon church. I doubt any of them are exclusive properties.

1 It is worth valueing yourself.
You can accomplish much with realism and determination.
there are obligations to others you should fulfill.
understanding pricipals is worth more than knowing rules.

I think I got those from scouts. Beyond that I am not remembering anything. Perhaps I will remember and add later.

[_Polygamy Porter]

I do not claiim to have answer for people dealing with personal doubt in the context of beliving families. I left at 18 and have not turned back. I have asked myself if I can seperate out of list of values I learned in church which should not be left behind and for which I can speak an honest thankyou.

My question is propelled by my own sense that raising children in the church is dangerous and only can be justified by honest belief. Childeren can be presented by severe turmoil trying to identify reality amoungst conflicting views of the church. An uncertain parent may only aggrevate the problem. I can remember a variety teenage disasters LDS teens underwent. They have no safety just being Mormon. A strong LDS family related to a close friend lost a child to heroin. That is a tragedy beyond blame pointing. I do not think it can be simple blamed upon conflicts over what is real. I doubt those conflicst provided safety or guidance.

I knew teens for whom growing up LDS was a hell of a conflict.

Yet I will make my list of what I give thanks that came to me via Mormon church. I doubt any of them are exclusive properties.

1 It is worth valueing yourself.
You can accomplish much with realism and determination.
there are obligations to others you should fulfill.
understanding pricipals is worth more than knowing rules.

I think I got those from scouts. Beyond that I am not remembering anything. Perhaps I will remember and add later.

It is the vicious cycle that LDS Inc relies on.

Why else do you think they expect a mission(for boys), marriage right after(for the RM and very young girls), and kids as soon as you can get it on?

It keeps the cycle going.

[_huckelberry]

PP, yes the fences keeping people in go up fast. Seventeen is a good age to get out.

[_Polygamy Porter]

PP, yes the fences keeping people in go up fast. Seventeen is a good age to get out.

I can only imagine. Consider yourself lucky.

Had I read "No Man Knows my History" or "Mormon Enigma" back when I was a teen, you can bet I would not be on this board.

I have broken the cycle though.

All of my children will not be forced to live the lies. My oldest is thankful he will not start seminary this year!

[_barrelomonkeys]

PP, yes the fences keeping people in go up fast. Seventeen is a good age to get out.

I fear that for a young person the "us vs. them" mentalitiy can run amok. It's really hard when there's a split family involved. :(

[_huckelberry]

[quote="barrelomonkeys"][quote="huckelberry"]PP, yes the fences keeping people in go up fast. Seventeen is a good age to get out.[/quote]

I fear that for a young person the "us vs. them" mentalitiy can run amok. It's really hard when there's a split family involved. :([/quote]

Actually I found myself thinking that other times of life would have there own advantages as best time to leave. If one was older then they would already have developed more experience and stability. I do not want to push people who feel they should stay due to family connections. But to a degree I started participating in these LDS boards when my father started speaking about his doubt that staying in the church for family was the best decision. I do not think he has resolved that.

I was feeling that honesty askes me to extend my list of things worth learning in an LDS church.

There was a group of things that I thought of that are not as simply acceptable as is as examples like be responsible. There is a group of ideas I was taught that I have had to think about through my life. I may not always agree with the ideas as presented. I have at times rejected them and others had to rethink. They touch on valuable things that are worth considering even if the consideration is critical.

In this vein I would make the obvious list of: God our creator, father. Jesus Christ and his teachings and life and death. I would include the idea of church as a community designed for mutual help. It is worth thinking about the united order, and perhaps why it doesn't happen. It is valuable to see how much LDS church is involvement by everybody. It is worth being presented with the idea of inspiration. The Holy Spirit is worth consideration even if some of the consideration is doubt.

[_Mercury]

PP, yes the fences keeping people in go up fast. Seventeen is a good age to get out.

I envy you.