Thanks TD and Nehor,
It does beg the question, "why?".
So why an existance in this mortal environment if it does not parallel what we are to experience after this life? Why is life so confusing that we discover that much of what we are lead to believe is contrived by our predessesors? Many of us are here posting because the Mormon church isn't exactly what it appears to be - even to the TBM's.
Why these relationships? Why a life that is not tailored to prepare us to expect what is beyond? Why the big surprise? Why the concern over not measuring up when we are not even crystal clear on the ground rules? I would prefer not to play the game if I am not fully aware of the ground rules. Makes me feel a little insignificant to the One that conceived of the game in the first place = as if they're being made up as we go along.
Today I'll conclude it is a waste of time, get up, feed myself and go to work to cover my familial obligations. Maybe tomorrow I will feel differently about it.
But yes, today it is depressing.