God's top 10 priorities

[_Scottie]

I was asked on MAD what I thought God's top 10 priorites are, since bringing souls to His one true church isn't in the top 10.

I posted this, but given the nature of the board, deleted it lest I get banned.

10. Possessing donkeys and making them talk.
9. Making sure he destroys those tacky false idols.
8. Clucking His tongue at the insufficient faith of the priesthood blessings for 50% of cancer patients.
7. Whipping up hurricanes and tsunami's to punish the wicked.
6. Making sure that His mouthpiece knows EXACTLY where He stands on how many earrings women can wear.
5. Waiting with lighting bolts to kill any who dares to steady His ark.
4. Ignoring the cries of anguish and pain from the billions of His children that are starving.
3. Trying to contain all those blessing that the heavens can't seem to hold to the faithful LDS tithe payers.
2. Giving confirmations to anyone and everyone that asks if their religion is true, because, well, at least parts of it are true.
1. Making sure his name is glorified by inciting fear and dread into the hearts of men.

[_Runtu]

I was asked on MAD what I thought God's top 10 priorites are, since bringing souls to His one true church isn't in the top 10.

I posted this, but given the nature of the board, deleted it lest I get banned.

10. Possessing donkeys and making them talk.
9. Making sure he destroys those tacky false idols.
8. Clucking His tongue at the insufficient faith of the priesthood blessings for 50% of cancer patients.
7. Whipping up hurricanes and tsunami's to punish the wicked.
6. Making sure that His mouthpiece knows EXACTLY where He stands on how many earrings women can wear.
5. Waiting with lighting bolts to kill any who dares to steady His ark.
4. Ignoring the cries of anguish and pain from the billions of His children that are starving.
3. Trying to contain all those blessing that the heavens can't seem to hold to the faithful LDS tithe payers.
2. Giving confirmations to anyone and everyone that asks if their religion is true, because, well, at least parts of it are true.
1. Making sure his name is glorified by inciting fear and dread into the hearts of men.

You forgot number 1: Making sure that his prophet bedded teenagers, no matter the cost.

[_Scottie]

I was asked on MAD what I thought God's top 10 priorites are, since bringing souls to His one true church isn't in the top 10.

I posted this, but given the nature of the board, deleted it lest I get banned.

10. Possessing donkeys and making them talk.
9. Making sure he destroys those tacky false idols.
8. Clucking His tongue at the insufficient faith of the priesthood blessings for 50% of cancer patients.
7. Whipping up hurricanes and tsunami's to punish the wicked.
6. Making sure that His mouthpiece knows EXACTLY where He stands on how many earrings women can wear.
5. Waiting with lighting bolts to kill any who dares to steady His ark.
4. Ignoring the cries of anguish and pain from the billions of His children that are starving.
3. Trying to contain all those blessing that the heavens can't seem to hold to the faithful LDS tithe payers.
2. Giving confirmations to anyone and everyone that asks if their religion is true, because, well, at least parts of it are true.
1. Making sure his name is glorified by inciting fear and dread into the hearts of men.

You forgot number 1: Making sure that his prophet bedded teenagers, no matter the cost.

*Smacks head* How in the hell did I forget that one???

[_MishMagnet]

You forgot making sure gay couples never get the right to legally marry.

The two biggest enemies to society are stem cells and monogamous gay couples! The horror!

[_silentkid]

God helped me find my misplaced birth certificate. I didn't ask for help, but I know that "helping people find things" is one of His priorities. I was able to apply for a passport today. It's my first. I'm going to Spain in January. That must be where God wants me to go. Otherwise, I'd still be looking for my birth certificate.

[_mormonmistress]

You forgot making sure gay couples never get the right to legally marry.

The two biggest enemies to society are stem cells and monogamous gay couples! The horror!

The most romantic wedding I have ever been to was that of two of my gay friends. We rock down here in NZ - not only were we the first to give women the vote, but we have also 'nearly' legalised gay marriage. They can have a civil union, which is pretty close.

[_harmony]

You forgot making sure gay couples never get the right to legally marry.

The two biggest enemies to society are stem cells and monogamous gay couples! The horror!

The most romantic wedding I have ever been to was that of two of my gay friends. We rock down here in NZ - not only were we the first to give women the vote, but we have also 'nearly' legalised gay marriage. They can have a civil union, which is pretty close.

Not in the temple, they can't. Not even in NZ.

[_Who Knows]

Helping people find their car keys.

[_JAK]

I was asked on MAD what I thought God's top 10 priorites are, since bringing souls to His one true church isn't in the top 10.

I posted this, but given the nature of the board, deleted it lest I get banned.

10. Possessing donkeys and making them talk.
9. Making sure he destroys those tacky false idols.
8. Clucking His tongue at the insufficient faith of the priesthood blessings for 50% of cancer patients.
7. Whipping up hurricanes and tsunami's to punish the wicked.
6. Making sure that His mouthpiece knows EXACTLY where He stands on how many earrings women can wear.
5. Waiting with lighting bolts to kill any who dares to steady His ark.
4. Ignoring the cries of anguish and pain from the billions of His children that are starving.
3. Trying to contain all those blessing that the heavens can't seem to hold to the faithful LDS tithe payers.
2. Giving confirmations to anyone and everyone that asks if their religion is true, because, well, at least parts of it are true.
1. Making sure his name is glorified by inciting fear and dread into the hearts of men.

1. Making sure his name is glorified by inciting fear and dread into the hearts of men.

A most contemptible entity invented as a means to control. The simultaneous claims that invented God should be loved and feared at the same time is absurd. If feared, then the invented God is clearly a threat. If loved and in turn LOVES, what is there to fear?

What’s the difference between glorifying name and glorifying the entity of invention?

I should like to see a detailed, academic and honest discussion of that.
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2. Giving confirmations to anyone and everyone that asks if their religion is true, because, well, at least parts of it are true.

An ambiguous statement. What parts are true? What parts are not? What’s “confirmations” other than claims? And what evidence is provided beyond further assertions absent evidence which has been objectively reviewed, questioned, and tested? It appears NONE is the correct answer.
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3. Trying to contain all those blessing that the heavens can't seem to hold to the faithful LDS tithe payers.

A meaningless, irrational claim absent evidence.
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4. Ignoring the cries of anguish and pain from the billions of His children that are starving.

And just who is responsible for this fact (finally a factual observation) which can be documented.

“His children” is again a claim for which no evidence is established. Truth by assertion is unreliable.
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Neither these four nor the remainder is worthy of comment except to recognize they are inventions or claims of evolving religious myth.

JAK

[_mormonmistress]

Not in the temple, they can't. Not even in NZ.

And why the hell would they want to? If such a religion cannot even recognise that gay people were born that way and they can't help their sexual preferences and there is nothing wrong with them being this way then the church doesn't deserve to have them as their members.