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Mr. Scratch Fever
(originally composed and sung by Brother Nugent as Cat Scratch Fever)

Well they don't know where he comes from
But he sure does come
I bet he is comin' for Danny C P!
And I don't know how he does it
But he sure does it good
I wonder how he does it for free

He gives em Mr. Scratch fever
Mr. Scratch fever

The first time they got it
It was just ten months ago
They got it from the Shady Acres board
They went to see the Dr. and
He they thought he gave them the cure
I think instead, they got it some more!

He gives em Mr. Scratch fever
Mr. Scratch fever

It's nothin dangerous
But they do feel pain
They got to ch-ch-change
You know they got it when they're going insane
It makes a grown man cry, cry cry
It makes em wet the bed

He makes the truth purr with
The stroke of his mouse-hand
They know they gettin' it from Dr. Shades MD Beeee
They know just where to go
When they need their truth man
They know he does it for free

He gives em Mr. Scratch fever
Mr. Scratch fever!

\sdfgr

This was the song PP meant to post...

Slack Scratch Fever (on moldy oldie Thursday)


Well I don't know where he came from
But he came on strong
He's set his sights on me
He's an anti-Mormon man
On a mission you see,
Disingenuously

He's got the slack Scratch fever
Slack Scratch fever.

He's got chutzpa and he musta
been a difficult child
His schooling didn't go well
He went to see the doctor
Tried to get his head straight
But Wade said "Scratch, what the Hell?"

You give me slack Scratch fever
Slack Scratch fever.
He's just an exmo Reaver
Slack Scratch fever

He's so tendentious
He feels no shame
He may ne-never change
You know you got it
And you can spot it
When what he says seems sane, sane
Its an endless verbal game

(Guitar solo while inebriated exmo woman through Victoria Secrets undergarments at the stage)

Well he dances and he prances
And he twists in the wind
And we just do what we can
To make him feel better
When he hoists his petard
And falls down flat on his...grass

He gives us slack Scratch fever
Slack Scratch fever.
I'll need some Smirnoff later
Slack Scratch Fever.