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Mormon God's Penis

Posted: Sat Apr 12, 2008 11:29 pm
by _KimberlyAnn
Another thread on the board has evolved into a discussion about Mormon God's penis. As we all know, Mormons believe God was once a man, and now, as a God, he still has his manhood intact and uses it to sire spirit children with his Goddess wife/wives. This is widely acknowledged in the Mormon church, and, as has been discussed on this board previously, seems a big point of interest to certain Mormon apologists, particularly Will Schryver and Kerry Shirts.

Brother Shirts, a.k.a. The Backyard Professor, claims to have proven by archeology that God has a penis. In a podcast on the subject, Shirts enthusiastically described Mormon God's ejaculate as his "great creative force" and mentioned the satisfied look of joy on God's wife's face after intercourse--Mormon God apparently has quite the sexual prowess.

Follows the link to the MDB discussion of the podcast, which contains a link to the podcast itself:

Backyard Science

The concept of God the Father having a penis is utterly foreign to Christians, despite the protestations of some Mormons. Christians do not believe God the Father came to earth as Jesus Christ. The belief that God the Father became Jesus in the flesh is called Modalism, (I believe, though I'm far from certain), and is considered a heresy by mainstream Christians. So, the argument that Christians believe God has a penis because they believe Jesus to be God doesn't hold water because Christians do not believe God the Father has a body at all. To them, He exists, and has existed, eternally as spirit.

What is interesting is that while some Mormons seem comfortable, even enthusiastic, about discussing the genitalia of Mormon God, they frown on critics mentioning it at all. When brought up by critics, the subject of God having a penis is suddenly inappropriate. The fact is that Mormons believe God has a penis. They believe He once was a man. Many believe He has multitudes of Goddess wives. Yet, Mormons often seem uncomfortable with their own doctrine. I say, if the doctrine is uncomfortable or embarrassing, then it's time to re-examine it. Perhaps there's good reason to be embarrassed of it.

KA

Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2008 12:05 am
by _John Larsen
Even more shocking, God has a rectum.

Re: Mormon God's Penis

Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2008 12:16 am
by _cksalmon
KimberlyAnn wrote:Brother Shirts, a.k.a. The Backyard Professor, claims to have proven by archeology that God has a penis. In a podcast on the subject, Shirts enthusiastically described Mormon God's ejaculate as his "great creative force" and mentioned the satisfied look of joy on God's wife's face after intercourse--Mormon God apparently has quite the sexual prowess.


It is impossible at this point to give up Book of Abraham as scripture; thus, Shirts's, to my mind, desperate attempt to defend it with near-gleeful abandon by adducing El's long penis.

Given what he has to work with, well, at least he's embracing the obvious.

Seems he's attempting to make a virtue of necessity.

CKS

Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2008 12:18 am
by _KimberlyAnn
John Larsen wrote:Even more shocking, God has a rectum.


M.G. doesn't have blood, though, according to Mormon doctrine. I suppose God's erection depicted on the Book of Abraham facsimile is full of spirit.

The whole idea of God being an exalted man is so bizarre to me now!

KA

Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2008 1:17 am
by _Dr. Shades
KimberlyAnn wrote:I suppose God's erection depicted on the Book of Abraham facsimile is full of spirit.


Funny thing, but considering the angle of the, uh, depiction in the facsimile, I had always thought it was merely the arm-rest of the throne he was sitting on. I never would've guessed it was supposed to be depicting a sexual organ.

Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2008 2:52 am
by _Mercury
has this been initiated by Kerry Shirts?

Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2008 3:01 am
by _cksalmon
Mercury wrote:has this been initiated by Kerry Shirts?


Absolutely.

Shirts's is very enthusiastic about this. He is the only one of whom I know.

CKS

Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2008 3:13 am
by _bcspace
The concept of God the Father having a penis is utterly foreign to Christians, despite the protestations of some Mormons.


Perhaps. But I think it's important to note that trinitarians distinguish between the Persons of God (Father, Son, HG) and the Being of God. The Persons are just that, Persons. Therefore, I don't think the notion is quite as alien as you think though I hear from many Christians that even though the Persons look like people, they are sexless.

Christians do not believe God the Father came to earth as Jesus Christ. The belief that God the Father became Jesus in the flesh is called Modalism, (I believe, though I'm far from certain), and is considered a heresy by mainstream Christians. So, the argument that Christians believe God has a penis because they believe Jesus to be God doesn't hold water because Christians do not believe God the Father has a body at all. To them, He exists, and has existed, eternally as spirit.


I don't recall any LDS making this argument. However, since we know the spirit looks like the body, the implication is that the spirit also has all the same parts as the body.

Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2008 3:22 am
by _Moniker
bcspace wrote:
The concept of God the Father having a penis is utterly foreign to Christians, despite the protestations of some Mormons.


Perhaps. But I think it's important to note that trinitarians distinguish between the Persons of God (Father, Son, HG) and the Being of God. The Persons are just that, Persons. Therefore, I don't think the notion is quite as alien as you think though I hear from many Christians that even though the Persons look like people, they are sexless.



Oh, dear.... I so don't know what I'm talking about. Yet, I'm almost 100% positive that you are wrong about this...

Re: Mormon God's Penis

Posted: Sun Apr 13, 2008 4:06 am
by _the road to hana
KimberlyAnn wrote:. Brother Shirts, a.k.a. The Backyard Professor, claims to have proven by archeology that God has a penis. In a podcast on the subject, Shirts enthusiastically described Mormon God's ejaculate as his "great creative force" and mentioned the satisfied look of joy on God's wife's face after intercourse--Mormon God apparently has quite the sexual prowess.

Follows the link to the MDB discussion of the podcast, which contains a link to the podcast itself:

Backyard Science

The concept of God the Father having a penis is utterly foreign to Christians, despite the protestations of some Mormons. Christians do not believe God the Father came to earth as Jesus Christ. The belief that God the Father became Jesus in the flesh is called Modalism, (I believe, though I'm far from certain), and is considered a heresy by mainstream Christians. So, the argument that Christians believe God has a penis because they believe Jesus to be God doesn't hold water because Christians do not believe God the Father has a body at all. To them, He exists, and has existed, eternally as spirit.


Kerry's got this one wrong. bcspace actually has it more correctly characterized, below. Kerry's confusing the individual persons of the Godhead with what trinitarians refer to as "God," which is really what Mormons think of as the Godhead. Would Mormons say that "the Godhead has a penis?" No, of course not. So Kerry's off base here.

Trinitarian Christians in general don't speculate on whether or not God (as in God the Father) has a body. They accept that Jesus Christ has a resurrected and glorified body, because he's the incarnation, the word made flesh, and because the apostles walked and talked with him and claim to have seen him as a resurrected being. The reason it hasn't generally been a widely held belief in mainstream trinitarian Christianity that God (the Father) has a body is that the incarnation is held up to have been a singular event which would likely be rendered moot otherwise.

Anyway, Kerry's blowing smoke here, and completely mischaracterizing Christians. bcspace's characterization is more accurate.

There are segments of mainstream Christianity that believe that God (as in "the Godhead"/"the Trinity") is neither male nor female precisely because it is both male and female. So again, the penis business would be sort of aside from the point.