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Callings - Spousal consent or no?
Posted: Mon Jan 05, 2009 2:32 pm
by _Maxrep
This past Sunday, my wife was asked if she would accept the calling of 1st counselor in the primary presidency. I was not in attendance that particular week, though I am usually present for Sacrament services. Its not often that I endure the full 3 hour block. My wife believes in the church on M-W-F. There isn't a day of the week that I fall into that snare :).
I'll admit that I was a little surprised to hear that she had been offered that calling, without my being included in the process. To be honest, my impression was that within the LDS(male) order of things, the head of the house hold was to give his consent in these matters. Sounds quite chauvinistic huh? Does the CHI make a statement on this matter?
The reality is that a husband or wife should not be required to ask permission of one another on most items, though communication on many topics can always be helpful. My wife is more competent than myself, and does not need my "stamp of approval".
Re: Callings - Spousal consent or no?
Posted: Mon Jan 05, 2009 3:22 pm
by _harmony
A calling in Primary? Turn it down immediately (unless you have small children). Some days, you just can't buy a break.
Personally, I think I have the best two callings in the church. I'm the ward webmaster and the bulletin lady. So I know everything that's going on before it happens, and my attendance on Sunday is not required.
I thought they were supposed to ask you too, especially for a leadership calling (not that the Primary presidency is leadership in the classic sense, but still...). The inverse is not the case, however. I never sustained my husband to one of his callings because the bishop didn't run it by me first. Had he done so, he would have heard my vehement protest. I also never sustained that bishop again.
Re: Callings - Spousal consent or no?
Posted: Mon Jan 05, 2009 3:49 pm
by _Yoda
My husband has never been asked before I receive a calling. I guess they just assume he won't have a problem with it. LOL
My feeling is similar to Harm's. I really think that you should have callings based on where your kids are. If you have kids in primary, you should be working in primary. If you have kids in YM/YW, then you should be working in YM/YW.
I think that is the BEST way to get parental involvement and support.
Re: Callings - Spousal consent or no?
Posted: Mon Jan 05, 2009 3:55 pm
by _Dr. Shades
liz3564 wrote:I think that is the BEST way to get parental involvement and support.
Or you can quit going to church, in which case parental involvement and support isn't necessary.
Re: Callings - Spousal consent or no?
Posted: Mon Jan 05, 2009 4:12 pm
by _Maxrep
Dr. Shades wrote:liz3564 wrote:I think that is the BEST way to get parental involvement and support.
Or you can quit going to church, in which case parental involvement and support isn't necessary.
We do have kids in primary.
I like to think I am contributing in my own, "special" way. Myself and 3 others who would otherwise be in elders quorum attendance, shorten the three hour block. After sacrament, we chit chat with friends for a bit in the foyer and then excuse ourselves to go shopping at a fine farmers market. We call it lunch club. One of the wives has said, "Well, I don't like you going shopping, but while you're there pick up some ...". Haha. Though we don't advertise our where abouts for the last two hours, its no secret that we are vigorously breaking the Sabbath :).
When we do attend Sunday school, we will stir the pot from time to time as well with certain subjects.
Re: Callings - Spousal consent or no?
Posted: Mon Jan 05, 2009 4:54 pm
by _Seven
My husband has always been consulted prior to the church extending a calling to me.
The church handbook 1999 says:
When a sister will be called to a Church position, it may be desirable to confer with her husband first.
(edit to add the year-the 2006 CHI appears to have removed this instruction)
Re: Callings - Spousal consent or no?
Posted: Mon Jan 05, 2009 5:12 pm
by _Sethbag
I think it's hit or miss with the spousal consent thing. I've had the bishopric call me up and ask me whether I'm OK with my wife or daughter taking a calling before, but my wife came home yesterday and said she'd been called as the Beehive advisor and nobody said jack to me about it. Oh well. I don't think I rule the home or anything because I have a wiener, so it's not like anyone has to ask my permission for my wife to do something - she's an adult.
Re: Callings - Spousal consent or no?
Posted: Mon Jan 05, 2009 5:22 pm
by _Seven
Maxrep wrote:One of the wives has said, "Well, I don't like you going shopping, but while you're there pick up some ...". Haha. Though we don't advertise our where abouts for the last two hours, its no secret that we are vigorously breaking the Sabbath :).
We have a little joke with friends & family that since I'm going to hell now anyway, I should be the one to make that Sabbath breaking trip to the store if we are in need of something.
Re: Callings - Spousal consent or no?
Posted: Mon Jan 05, 2009 5:37 pm
by _Seven
Unto the woman He said, “I will greatly multiply the pain of thy childbearing; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and yet thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee” (Genesis 3:16).
Re: Callings - Spousal consent or no?
Posted: Mon Jan 05, 2009 5:39 pm
by _Dr. Shades
Seven wrote:Unto the woman He said, “I will greatly multiply the pain of thy childbearing; in sorrow thou shalt bring forth children; and yet thy desire shall be to thy husband, and he shall rule over thee” (Genesis 3:16).
So. . . was the
first part of the verse any better??