DiscussMormonism.com

I'm posing this question on behalf of my best friend, who happens to be a TBM by every measure. He is a BYU graduate, return missionary, family man, and quite frankly one of the most admirable human beings I have ever met. Here is the issue:

His wife is unable to bear children. They adopted a girl through LDS Adoption Services several years ago and just recently a baby boy. The baby boy (Jason) was put up for adoption at the last minute - literally, the mother gave birth on the way to the hospital, and claims she did not know she was pregnant - and my friend received a phone call the day Jason was born telling him to, "Come pick up your son."

Well, $8,000 later my friend is now the proud parent of a son, however, now the birth mother wants him back. She has been fighting with LDS Adoption Services and has now filed a writ of habeas corpus and they are due in court tomorrow.

I'm wondering if anyone here has any advice I can pass on to my friend, who really is a good dad and would be devastated if he lost their son whom they've had and bonded with for several months now.

Thanks in advance.

Tell him to get a damn good lawyer and fight like hell. LDS family services has access to all his church records and can get any past Bishop/StPrez/leader and most members to talk about anything they know or even suspect about him and his family. True or not, they will use it against him if they possibly can.

A good Lawyer who is not afraid of LDS, Inc is his only hope here.

The state he is in is important. Plus LDS services has likely been through this before. Same case different face. I'm sure their attorney's know what to do.

How long has your friend had the baby? If he hasn't had him for very long, maybe the best outcome is to give the baby back to the mother in exchange for all the costs your friend has incurred (at least $8,000). If the mother has a colorable claim, this could drag on for a very long time.

To be clear, this is in California. I believe that LDS Family Services is on my friend's side and supports the current arrangement.

How long have they had the baby. I'm sure there is something that all parties signed if the birth mother has any kind of window period where she can change her mind. Like I said before - this has likely happened a thousand times before in California and what ever the laws say or appeals courts have ruled the lawyers and parents will need to follow.

Here is one websites thoughts:

http://library.adoption.com/articles/White House ... -mind.html

karl61 wrote:Here is one websites thoughts:

http://library.adoption.com/articles/White House ... -mind.html

some other thoughts:

http://www.adoptionlawfirm.com/editable ... arents.htm

karl61 wrote:How long have they had the baby. I'm sure there is something that all parties signed if the birth mother has any kind of window period where she can change her mind. Like I said before - this has likely happened a thousand times before in California and what ever the laws say or appeals courts have ruled the lawyers and parents will need to follow.

I'd say about six months, maybe less. I know there are some issues with the waiver the mother signed and LDS Family Services allowing her more time than the State legally does to change her mind, but I'm not entirely clear on all of those details. I do understand that while her "say" in this has already been relinquished, the birth father still has the option to contest the adoption.

Eric....If your friend and his wife have literally had custody of the baby since birth, then they have bonded with the baby.

They are the only parents that baby has known.

This bonding process is a very strong legitimate part of child development. I'm sure that a pediatrician, child psychologist, or both, would be able to help testify in conjunction with some of this type of research as well.

Your friend will be in my prayers.