feeling awful reading anti Mormon literature...

[_Rambo]

So I have been talking to my friend about why I don't believe anymore and I said for him to have a good understanding he would have to read a few books.

I said...
You might be asking what type of books they are... One is not even a religous book and does not even mention Mormons (Guns Germs and Steel). The other is written by a faithful member of the church and the lds apologists confirm what he has to say (ISL).

He then wrote back and said.
The truth is. Every time I read anti Mormon literature, I feel awful.
It took me months to get over that. In fact, I'm still not sure if I'm over that.

I think he feels awful because he is told that you will feel awful when you read anti Mormon literature. I also think he feels awful because some cognitive dissonance kicks in.

Any suggestions what I should say to him. Maybe refer to him to wikipedia to read about cognitive dissonance? Tell him I feel kind of upset when I read things I don't agree with?

Thanks.

[_thews]

I'd tell him to seek the truth and accept it for what it is and not what he wants it to be. The song Losing my religion by REM is metaphoric for losing everything. When this harsh reality is realized, the walls that contained all the truth come down as the glue that held all the circular reasoning unravels the truth. The typical response is of anger from being duped. One of my relatives said she felt like a fool as she was the only one in her 30's that didn't know Santa Claus wasn't real. When you have to re-evaluate something your existence was defined by you can feel hopelessly lost. I would advise your friend to ask some questions here:

http://www.exmormonforums.com/viewforum ... 926ac7cec6

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9TXqSJ9qDQ8

[_Themis]

I think he feels awful because he is told that you will feel awful when you read anti Mormon literature. I also think he feels awful because some cognitive dissonance kicks in.

Any suggestions what I should say to him. Maybe refer to him to wikipedia to read about cognitive dissonance? Tell him I feel kind of upset when I read things I don't agree with?

Sources that don't talk about the church may be good. Unfortunately the church's best tool in keeping it's members ignorant of many facts about the church is by telling us how bad it's is to read anything critical of the church, and to view it as anti. Some members don't even want to read apologetic material. If he will, this would be a good idea. I learned many things I hadn't known before through apologetic material. If he is open minded enough, it should be easy for him to see how bad some of the apologetic arguments can be. I might remind him that one cannot get both sides of an issue whether LDS or not without looking at both sides.

[Guest]

"Losing my religion" is a southern expression meaning losing one's cool or being at your wits end. The song is just about unrequited love. The narrator wants somebody bad so he's "losing his religion." The song is addressed to the person he's in love/obsessed with. It isn't about actually losing one's religion or "losing everything."

Edit: Notice in that colloquial expression the ability to keep calm and collected is referred to as one's "religion." Ahh, the south.

[_malkie]

So I have been talking to my friend about why I don't believe anymore and I said for him to have a good understanding he would have to read a few books.

I said...
You might be asking what type of books they are... One is not even a religous book and does not even mention Mormons (Guns Germs and Steel). The other is written by a faithful member of the church and the lds apologists confirm what he has to say (ISL).

He then wrote back and said.
The truth is. Every time I read anti Mormon literature, I feel awful.
It took me months to get over that. In fact, I'm still not sure if I'm over that.

I think he feels awful because he is told that you will feel awful when you read anti Mormon literature. I also think he feels awful because some cognitive dissonance kicks in.

Any suggestions what I should say to him. Maybe refer to him to wikipedia to read about cognitive dissonance? Tell him I feel kind of upset when I read things I don't agree with?

Thanks.

Depends on what he has read. You may well feel that you can agree with him about the legitimacy of his feelings with respect to some of the "anti" stuff out there. I haven't read any of it myself, but I understand that the books by Ed Decker and others of his ilk are "not very nice".

Of course, some members are offended by the writings of the Tanners, and I can't say that I think that they are offensive in any way.

[_Inconceivable]

The truth is. Every time I read anti Mormon literature, I feel awful.
It took me months to get over that. In fact, I'm still not sure if I'm over that.

I was constantly asked by Mormons whether reading "anti" material made me happy. Because if it didn't make me happy, it was probably false and evil.

What an invalid argument.

Truth doesn't necessarily make you happy. It's what you do with it and about it that will determine your happiness.

If you are willing to recognize the truth for what it is and take responsibility for the knowledge you gain, it can set you free of false conceptions that limit your life's experience.

Knowing the truth of Mormon shows you that there are yet obstacles strewn in your pathway of happiness. What would you rather do, stumble over them?

[_thews]

"Losing my religion" is a southern expression meaning losing one's cool or being at your wits end. The song is just about unrequited love. The narrator wants somebody bad so he's "losing his religion." The song is addressed to the person he's in love/obsessed with. It isn't about actually losing one's religion or "losing everything."

Edit: Notice in that colloquial expression the ability to keep calm and collected is referred to as one's "religion." Ahh, the south.

http://www.songfacts.com/detail.php?id=1256
Like I said... it's a metaphor for the magnitude of what is lost.

The title is a Southern expression meaning "At my wit's end," as if things were going so bad you could lose your faith in God. If you were "Losing your religion" over a person, It could also mean losing faith in that person.

[_EAllusion]

I was constantly asked by Mormons whether reading "anti" material made me happy. Because if it didn't make me happy, it was probably false and evil.

I feel pretty bad when I find out I bought a lemon. Heck, I feel pretty bad when I discover in retrospect I could've got a better deal. I'm sure that's a common phenomenon. I wonder if they would be willing to use the same reasoning there when it comes to doing things like reading up on products you bought. Does it make you happy to find out information that suggests your decisions weren't ideal? In the moment? Heck no.

Don't read Consumer Reports. It's of the devil.

[_Willy Law]

[
I was constantly asked by Mormons whether reading "anti" material made me happy. Because if it didn't make me happy, it was probably false and evil.

What an invalid argument.

Truth doesn't necessarily make you happy.

This,
Of course I felt awful reading it. It was proving to me that the one organization I trusted the most had been lying to me my entire life. How is that suppose to make me feel.

I also feel awful when I read about the holocaust so is that untrue?

[_EAllusion]

http://www.songfacts.com/detail.php?id=1256
Like I said... it's a metaphor for the magnitude of what is lost.

The title is a Southern expression meaning "At my wit's end," as if things were going so bad you could lose your faith in God. If you were "Losing your religion" over a person, It could also mean losing faith in that person.

Well that random comment sourced to "doug" clearly seals the deal. Again, I'm pretty sure the etymology is more about "religion" being the source of moral and civilized behavior. I think a parallel phrase would be something like, "I'm losing my upbringing." It's about losing your restraint because you're so upset. That's all.