Post-mo virus...

[_Hades]

I don't know if that big elephant in the room ever goes away. My family has gotten used to the fact that I'm out, so there is less testimony bearing now. They still have their subtle tactics. They know I have an issue with the use of shame and guilt, so they mask it. They try to come up with examples of how the church is cool and would never shame anyone. They might as well come up with examples of how Satan isn't evil.

It has forced them to see me as an individual. I no longer have church tied to me so they either have to see me as an evil apostate or look for other things to associate me with. They see that my life and family haven't fallen apart. I don't live in poverty. My little family is happy. The kids still do kid things and they still have friends. I don't bite the heads of baby chickens or club baby seals. They seem to be a little more at ease with me now. I still don't know if they would let their kids spend the night at my house, though. The apostasy bug might just go around at night.

For you bcspace, of course it's fear. Go to your bishop and tell him that you have been hanging out with apostates. Tell him that you are really starting to see their point of view. I'll bet the very thought will cause you fear. I'll bet the bishop's reaction would be entirely fear based.

[_bcspace]

For you bcspace, of course it's fear. Go to your bishop and tell him that you have been hanging out with apostates. Tell him that you are really starting to see their point of view. I'll bet the very thought will cause you fear. I'll bet the bishop's reaction would be entirely fear based.

lol What if Bishops are under my "jurisdiction"? Who then do I see? by the way, I'm quite certain most Bishops would not react this way, especially seeing as how there is no such thing as a chapel/internet Mormon dichotomy.

[_Hades]

lol What if Bishops are under my "jurisdiction"? Who then do I see? by the way, I'm quite certain most Bishops would not react this way, especially seeing as how there is no such thing as a chapel/internet Mormon dichotomy.

Just tell your friends and family, then. Make sure you tell the parents of your kid's friends (assuming you have kids).

[_Lucinda]

BC--first of all, don't be saying "we" this and "we" that with regards to my TBM family and friends. You aren't and wouldn't be among them--not with the size of your enormous ego.

She's the one who needs to ask the questions. We're simply respecting her decision.

What questions? That's a funny way of showing respect.

No conditions were imposed. No one disinvited her from the Thanksgiving dinner.

How do you know? Are you my FIL in disguise?

lol What if Bishops are under my "jurisdiction"? Who then do I see?

Get over yourself. Do you think a question like that impresses anyone here??? Bleh....

[_Lucinda]

Remember: when you see the bitter apostate, you do not see only an absence of light, you see also the presence of darkness.
Do not spread disease germs! - “The Mantle Is Far, Far Greater Than the Intellect”, Boyd K. Packer (bold mine)

hahahaha!!! Oh, sorry....you actually BELIEVE that?? OK, then I'll respond. If you had read the original post you would have seen that I said, "I'm not asking anyone to deny anything. I actually have a lot of respect for other people's beliefs." How is that bitter? It's amazing to me that because someone disagrees with you, as a TBM, they are now bitter, full of darkness, and with no light. So the pot of soup that's simmering on my stove to take to my sick friend should just be poured down the sink? Better--flushed down the toilet. That couldn't have been kindness in my heart when I made it, for I have no light left in my soul....You guys should seriously take a look at yourselves!! I'm really hoping you were joking, asbestosman.

[_Polygamy-Porter]

Since we all were part of that CULTure we already know what people think of us and how they will react.

I would guess that most are afraid to confront their own doubts about Mormonism. Unless you are an egomaniac mo'pologist you have at least a few doubts about Mormonism. Most have many.

Many have been brainwashed to believe that Mormonism is the only way to raise a good family. They see you walking away from that with confidence and their sudsy brains just cannot handle thinking like that, I mean for cripes sakes how will you even know how to raise a family now????

Since you have a cowgirl themed avatar, its like all of the cowboys sitting around the corral bragging about riding the fresh unbroken bronco.

You walked in, grabbed the mane and threw your leg over it's bare back and and rode that bitch bronco into complete submission.

When you challenged the other braggarts to do the same, they all allowed their fear of failure and humiliation to guide them.

You are leaving the cult literally within the compound(your 95% Mormon subdivision/town) That takes courage that none of the others who remain will ever attain.

[_Lucinda]

Now here's a stellar example of conditional love and friendship. You're a real tool, BC.

Good points already. I think most members are not like BC. As Runtu mentioned, most of my so-called friends are taught that I am a carrier of an infection that can easilly spread.

Some people think that guns "just go off" too and they're dreadfully fearful of even being around them. But the truth of the matter is that guns don't just go off.

Thanks, Inc. Good points as always.

They might look at Lucinda and think, "Okay, what is that one thing I can say that will make the big difference to her.... Got it! I need to testify to her in a small way so she can feel the spirit again!" This might be the most loving thing they can think to do. In their mind, they are exerting a huge amount of love to you and for you. In your mind, the conversation feels fake.

Good point, Zee. I actually had someone sit me down to tell me their story of almost leaving and then coming back. This person looked me in the eyes when they got to the part of why they didn't leave and was waiting for the same light to go off in my head. More smiling and nodding on my part, but I know this person was coming from a place of love.

It has forced them to see me as an individual. I no longer have church tied to me so they either have to see me as an evil apostate or look for other things to associate me with. They see that my life and family haven't fallen apart. I don't live in poverty. My little family is happy. The kids still do kid things and they still have friends. I don't bite the heads of baby chickens or club baby seals. They seem to be a little more at ease with me now. I still don't know if they would let their kids spend the night at my house, though. The apostasy bug might just go around at night.

Love your insight, Hades. Hopefully time will help.

[_Tchild]

Yes, at first you will be seen by family and friends as having been inflicted with the virus of apostacy, but those attitudes will wane and ebb.

It helps to keep your "reasons" to yourself, as believers will hardly get it. Be respectful of others (as you already are no doubt), and stay away from the super "sins"; child porn rings, heroin dealer, Hell's Angel loan shark enforcer, land mine exporter and other apostate careers.

I live in Orem, and am surrounded by LDS. I treat my LDS friends and neighbors well and they likewise treat our family graciously in return.

Of course, being extraordinarily handsome, charismatic and intelligent may have helped me more than the average apostate, but I am still sympathetic to the plight of those who have to work harder at it than I do.

Good luck Lucinda and imagine a little smiley face at the end of the last paragraph.

[_Lucinda]

Many have been brainwashed to believe that Mormonism is the only way to raise a good family. They see you walking away from that with confidence and their sudsy brains just cannot handle thinking like that, I mean for cripes sakes how will you even know how to raise a family now????

Thanks, Porter--love the analogy. About "how to raise a family now?" The things people have said about this have blown me away. I had a very close family member ask me how I could pull my kids out when they are too young to make that decision for themselves. How about being too young to be brainwashed starting at age 3 with "follow the prophet" chants and "I know this church is true" testimony bearing? Another close family member said how will our kids possibly learn the dangers of alcohol/drug abuse, or the consequences of immoral behavior? Picking my jaw up off of the floor, I lovingly as possible told this family member, "why on earth would you think I would need a NEIGHBOR to teach my kids ANYTHING about morality? I have and still will teach my children all that they need to know in that respect." Is this a generational thing? Did our parents part ways with us after sacrament meeting and say, "thank the heavens we are in this church today. Now we won't have to talk to Lucinda about what will happen if she drinks alcohol at that party she's going to, or has sex with that cute boy she's been dating. We'll let her teachers here talk to her all about it." REALLY??

[_Lucinda]

Yes, at first you will be seen by family and friends as having been inflicted with the virus of apostacy, but those attitudes will wane and ebb.

It helps to keep your "reasons" to yourself, as believers will hardly get it. Be respectful of others (as you already are no doubt), and stay away from the super "sins"; child porn rings, heroin dealer, Hell's Angel loan shark enforcer, land mine exporter and other apostate careers.

I live in Orem, and am surrounded by LDS. I treat my LDS friends and neighbors well and they likewise treat our family graciously in return.

Of course, being extraordinarily handsome, charismatic and intelligent may have helped me more than the average apostate, but I am still sympathetic to the plight of those who have to work harder at it than I do.

Good luck Lucinda and imagine a little smiley face at the end of the last paragraph.

Thanks, Tchild. I've heard that advice before -- to keep our "reasons" to ourselves. I think that is probably very good advice. Especially because it has now come from two handsome, charismatic and intelligent people. ;) Gets a little frustrating though when TBM family takes on the holier-than-thou attitude with their testimony bearing and we are just expected to smile and graciously say thank you. I keep thinking a little glimpse into what's going on in my heart and my head (at least for very close family members) may help them understand me better. But I'll have to follow your lead on this one, I guess, because no one want to hear what we have to say.
Love the apostate career choices! Thanks for making me lol!