DiscussMormonism.com

why me wrote:

Baker wrote:
Thank god my parenting doesn't involve raising my daughters in the Mormon church. I am a far better father without that baggage that I would have been by subjecting them to that culture. Your notion that somehow a parent throws all the rules out the window by leaving Mormonism - or that those rules were only Mormon ingrained - is really stupid. One HUGE difference is that the rational for the rules becomes primarily one of best interests, maturity, preserving future options, etc. - rather than "because the church says so".

Let me try this again. You can not separate yourself from the lds church. It still influences your parenting even if it is more secular now. You will not tell your kids to eat, screw and be merry for tomorrow you die. You will give them a Mormon secular influence as far as it will go.

I never said that a parent throws everything out when they leave Mormonism. Just the opposite: they keep many of the values and give these values a secular twist.

And you're still a dumb ass. None of what I advise my children will be based on Mormonism - but rather common sense and real world experience.

why me wrote:

Buffalo wrote:
Parents who were never religious would probably give advice similar to their kids. This is an example of your Mormon superiority complex acting up - even though you're not really much of a Mormon.
I don't disagree with you in general - some things about Mormonism have helped me to be a better person. Others not so much.

Drinking, drugs, sex is certainly a problem with teenagers. As is stealing and peer pressure to conform. Being once a Mormon, you are much more prepared to handle these issues and teach your children a good value base because of your former Mormonism. And that was my point.

Again, BS - a former Mormon may actually have a harder time without the threat of eternal punishment to buttress the objection to the bad behavior, as the church - operating, for this purpose, under the dba "god" - acts as a super-parent. There are real world penalties for such misbehavior, but there's also ample opportunity to provide rational explanations for why responsible living is preferable to degeneracy.

Also - I think you are making a huge mistake to suggest that there is any material difference in the behavior of Mormon kids versus non-Mormon kids. Maybe in the corridor, but not where I grew up.

why me wrote:Here is my point: you will never know the dad you would have been if you never met the lds church. How you raise your children now even without the lds church is influenced by the lds church because it is a family centered church, teaching values to future parents about how to raise a child. You may raise secular children but the value structure will most likely come straight from the lds church. And that will not be a bad thing at all.

Also, you are not raising your children to be anarchistic or nihilistic. You are raising them with certain values in how to be a human being. And it is here that the Mormon influence will show itself with the positive values you impart to your children.

Nope, not going to work Why Me. You can't conclude that just because I was a member of the Mormon church that my values came from the Mormon church. You forget, I was a convert and spent only 15 years in it. My values didn't come from the church.

I knew many churches before the Mormon one. Mormonism hasn't written the book on the "family centered church". Mormonism only uses it to fool people into joining all the while omitting the fetid details.

Everything in Mormonism is tainted. Everything comes with a string attached. No matter how much you think it is beautiful, it isn't.

Mormonism tries so hard to sell itself on "family values", but it all comes with a price tag. Provide all the analogies you want, the prize is eternal polygamy and gods forever, with guilt and anxiety for all. Not my cup of tea.

Baker wrote:Also - I think you are making a huge mistake to suggest that there is any material difference in the behavior of Mormon kids versus non-Mormon kids. Maybe in the corridor, but not where I grew up.

My nevermo friend (who lives outside of Utah) has a couple of teenage kids who refuse to swear and get mad at their friends when they say rude things about people of other cultures. How in the hell did they learn to act this way without Mormon parents? OMG!

why me wrote:

sock puppet wrote:And probably more inclined to induce undue guilt. With the "good" comes the baggage.

When a kid steals they should feel guilty for doing something wrong. When a kid hurts someone else, they should feel guilt or remorse. When a child disrespects their parents, they should feel guilt.

It only shows that they know right from wrong and are not sociopaths.

So much fun - you've seriously got to be damned kidding. Kids have consciences regardless of religious upbringing, you dumb ass. They can all relate to the idea of Jimminy Cricket - perhaps other than the sociopaths, who are incurable regardless of religious education. What my kids might lose, perhaps, is a sense of chosenness and entitlement that would lead to justification for mistreatment of others, or gaining an advantage, when the counterparty is not of their faith.

What the Sta-Papurnickle happened to the "John Dehlin to resign" thread?





Peace,
Ceeboo

why me wrote:...LOL...

I LOVE this site....so, we have a confused catholic, 2 frustrated virgins, 2 crazy bigots and a couple of purely looney people (sb, the stem(+/-), mg, billy, etc.) defending all things LDS...Awesome...Its ads so much legitimacy to the LDS social club when the nutters come out to take a stand....

Now we know why Mr. Tanner is so sensationalist and why he doesn't seem to be concerned with factual accuracy - he can't separate himself from the Mormon culture that he once belonged to!

Chap wrote:

why me wrote:There is no reason to feel guilt in Mormonism.

why me wrote:When a kid steals they should feel guilty for doing something wrong.

Reading whyme's posts gives me the sense that cold porridge is being squirted into my skull - worse, cold contradictory and repetitive porridge. (What a misuse of metaphor ... this is doing me no kind of good.)

He goes onto 'ignore'. My sanity demands it.

Which means that Mormonism is not responsible for guilt. It is human to feel guilt. However, we in the west can not escape our judeo/christian heritage and Bible tradition. We also need to remember that Americans have been culturally influenced by the puritans.

Ceeboo wrote:What the Sta-Papurnickle happened to the "John Dehlin to resign" thread?

Peace,
Ceeboo

Unfortunately exmormons can not help but blast the lds church in various threads regardless of the topic. And then, there are a minority of people on this board that needs to defend the lds church in such cases.