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Pearl of Great Price, marked and explained by Joseph Smith as figure 7:

Represents God sitting upon his throne, revealing through the heavens the grand Key-words of the Priesthood; as, also, the sign of the Holy Ghost unto Abraham, in the form of a dove.

Why does God have an erection?


Oh, because that's Min, the Egyptian fertility god.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Min_%28god%29



Suddenly Mormon Polygamy makes more sense. The God of Mormonism is a fertility god with a permanently erect penis. This explains so much of Joseph Smith's later history.



It looks like Min a.k.a. the God of Abraham is actually black, though. He must have been miffed at that whole keeping blacks out of temples and the priesthood thing.

More images of the god who is apparently the god worshiped by Joseph Smith and the LDS church, according to canonized scripture:

Forgetting about Mormonism for a second, we should consider the importance of the portrayal of Min. Fertility was important. Child mortality was higher than it is now. I would guess that many families lived in smaller homes and often all slept in the same room. Parents likely had sex in the same room as their children, no? Sexuality was likely not as mysterious as it is today.

zeezrom wrote:Forgetting about Mormonism for a second, we should consider the importance of the portrayal of Min. Fertility was important. Child mortality was higher than it is now. I would guess that many families lived in smaller homes and often all slept in the same room. Parents likely had sex in the same room as their children, no? Sexuality was likely not as mysterious as it is today.

They hadn't invented Puritans yet. :p

"Represents God, known unto the ancients as Priapist, sitting upon his throne, revealing through the heavens the grand Key-words of the Priesthood; as, also, the sign of the Holy Ghost unto Abraham, in the form of a dove."

Baker wrote:"Represents God, known unto the ancients as Priapist, sitting upon his throne, revealing through the heavens the grand Key-words of the Priesthood; as, also, the sign of the Holy Ghost unto Abraham, in the form of a dove."

In those days the holy sacrament came in the form of a little blue pill.

Baker wrote:"Represents God, known unto the ancients as Priapist, sitting upon his throne, revealing through the heavens the grand Key-words of the Priesthood; as, also, the sign of the Holy Ghost unto Abraham, in the form of a dove."

And, apparently, kindly supplying an ample perch for that dove.

I thought this Mormon god was using a keyboard.....looks, you know, rectangle-shaped.

Oooooooohhhhhh!!

All this time, I thought people were referring to the Problem of Evil when they said god was a huge prick.

Unwritten Commandment #11
THOU SHALT NOT MAKE LIGHT OF THE HOLY ERECTION! THOU SHALT WORSHIP IT AS YOU WORSHIP ME