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Lady Catherine makes a change
Posted: Thu May 26, 2011 12:44 am
by _zeezrom
One particular aspect of the British Royal wedding I found absolutely refreshing was something done by Lady Catherine. Before I get into that, let me add that I consider it a tragedy that some people did not see this event as wonderful.
According to tradition, the wedding vow script includes the word, "obey". Kate had it removed. The reason I bring this up is because I find it amazing that one person has the ability to make a change to something so foundational and traditional. There was no patriarichal approval or vote by leadership committee. The religious leaders didn't need to make a doctrinal change.
Kate didn't like it so she asked for it to be removed. No petitioning. No questions asked. No interogation. It is a glorious demonstration of freedom.
In contrast to this, consider a scenario in which a bride is not comfortable with the Mormon sealing script.
Re: Lady Catherine makes a change
Posted: Thu May 26, 2011 12:48 am
by _just me
That is awesome. Thanks for sharing.
One thing that you touch on that I have read about is the idea of permission. To really be free is to act without asking.
Re: Lady Catherine makes a change
Posted: Thu May 26, 2011 12:50 am
by _Jersey Girl
zee,
You'll be happy to hear (or not) that I had the word "obey" removed from my wedding vows as well.
I ain't lyin'
:-D
Re: Lady Catherine makes a change
Posted: Thu May 26, 2011 12:52 am
by _zeezrom
Jersey Girl, I am happy to know that.
Maybe this is more common a practice than I thought?
Re: Lady Catherine makes a change
Posted: Thu May 26, 2011 12:55 am
by _Jersey Girl
zeezrom wrote:Jersey Girl, I am happy to know that.
Maybe this is more common a practice than I thought?
I don't know how common a practice it is, but I didn't ask, I simply told my preacher that I wanted it OUT of my vows.
I wasn't willing to promise what I wasn't willing to deliver and I credit myself for being honest about it.
Re: Lady Catherine makes a change
Posted: Thu May 26, 2011 12:57 am
by _MsJack
Women have been making this change since Elizabeth Cady Stanton in 1840.
I actually don't even remember if my wedding vows had it or not. It may sound strange, but I was largely unconcerned with feminist issues at the time.
Re: Lady Catherine makes a change
Posted: Thu May 26, 2011 1:04 am
by _Aristotle Smith
Actually the Church of England gives this choice to all marriages. If I remember correctly, Will and Kate chose the 1966 ceremony in the Church of England Book of Common Prayer, which has options for either inserting the word "obey" or leaving it out. It's entirely the couples choice.
If a couple wants really traditional language and really traditional vows, then they will likely choose the 1662 ritual from the Book of Common Prayer. This ceremony pretty much coined all of the terms that English speaking people associate with marriage ("Dearly beloved... yadda yadda yadda"). My guess is that if you want 1662 traditional, you will stick with the traditional "obey" language.
Re: Lady Catherine makes a change
Posted: Thu May 26, 2011 1:05 am
by _Quasimodo
I don't remember if that was in my wife's vows or not. It's a moot point, though, since I'm the one obeying.
Re: Lady Catherine makes a change
Posted: Thu May 26, 2011 1:06 am
by _zeezrom
I'm not sure if Kate asked. The Newsweek article just says she "chose" to have it removed.
Just Me, that is an interesting point. Thanks.
Jack, hi. by the way, what happened to your priesthood thread? I vote that should take #1 of MDB threads
Re: Lady Catherine makes a change
Posted: Thu May 26, 2011 2:40 am
by _zeezrom
Aristotle Smith wrote:Actually the Church of England gives this choice to all marriages. If I remember correctly, Will and Kate chose the 1966 ceremony in the Church of England Book of Common Prayer, which has options for either inserting the word "obey" or leaving it out. It's entirely the couples choice.
If a couple wants really traditional language and really traditional vows, then they will likely choose the 1662 ritual from the Book of Common Prayer. This ceremony pretty much coined all of the terms that English speaking people associate with marriage ("Dearly beloved... yadda yadda yadda"). My guess is that if you want 1662 traditional, you will stick with the traditional "obey" language.
Thanks Aristotle! Well, this stole a little thunder but it's good to know.
I would also like to point out that the Mormon sealing vow does not include the word "obey".
I guess what I found fascinating was that the bride chose the wording. This is taboo in Mormonism.
When I think back at the most disappointing aspect of Mormon rituals, it is marriage.