DiscussMormonism.com

Okay, this place has been too damn serious lately. It's time to lighten things up.

So, I want you to tell me about some kind of mischief you engaged in while at church OR on an ecclesiastical function. Retreats, camp-outs, and LDS missions can all count.

Keep it fun and don't be jerks to one another.

I'll go first.

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I was volunteering as a Junior High/High School counselor for the local fall church retreat (attending a Presbyterian church at the time). This was when I was still single.

There was a male counselor there whom I didn't get along with very well. When I say I didn't get along with him very well, I mean that we really didn't like each other, not that there was sexual tension between us and we pretended to fight because it was the next best thing to giving into our impulses. We just didn't like each other.

We did some kind of game one afternoon with the teens that involved a runny Washington state mud slide. I can't remember what it was I said or did that set the other counselor off. Maybe that was the time I sent one of my teens with a pocket knife to destroy the other team's supply of water balloons. I dunno. I cheated at youth games too much to keep track.

So the other counselor was irritated with me about something, and he decided to exact revenge in the form of grabbing me by the arms and dragging me down the mudslide, which muddied my jeans, t-shirt, and jacket pretty badly. He thought he was being hilarious.

Alas, I don't have man-strength. I have puny ladies' arms, and I can't grab someone and forcefully drag them somewhere against their will. It's not my gift.

But . . . I had this:



Washington state banana slugs, Ariolimax columbianus. Second-largest species of slug in the world, maxing out at just shy of 10 inches. The wilderness surrounding this retreat was crawling with them.

Later that afternoon, I saw that the counselor in question was napping in the foyers of one of the buildings. So I went outside, snatched up the largest slug I could find, and planted it right on his sleeping face.

Then I ran like hell.

It wasn't long before I heard a yell of surprise from behind me.

I told my husband this story, and when I got to the "ran like hell" part, he replied, "You didn't want to stick around and watch him wake up with the slug on his face?"

I said, "No. He still had all that man-strength. I didn't really want to see what he was going to do to me with it the second time."

When I was a young adult in Salt Lake, some of the young adults went to Big Bear to a resort. I went with them. I began to notice one young woman whose name was debbie. She was cute and not a typical young adult. I knew that we had much in common from talking with her. I had my eye on her. One day when the young adults were off doing their thing, debbie and I shared a nice jacuzzi. It was a pleasure to look at her and have a chat. Enough said. But it does bring back nice memories.

my first heavy third base activity occurred on a temple trip at the age of 15 in the van loaded with young adult leaders...man did that girl mess me up good.

Sprite in the sacrament cups. Bringing my AD&D manuals to Church. Assorted spit wads and fleets paper airplanes.

why me wrote:When I was a young adult in Salt Lake, some of the young adults went to Big Bear to a resort. I went with them. I began to notice one young woman whose name was debbie. She was cute and not a typical young adult. I knew that we had much in common from talking with her. I had my eye on her. One day when the young adults were off doing their thing, debbie and I shared a nice jacuzzi. It was a pleasure to look at her and have a chat. Enough said. But it does bring back nice memories.

Light cotton swimsuits?

Actually seems innocent enough and I have a couple similar events but no spa..... a hay ride for one. No light cotton damn it.

When I was a teen we used to take aluminum foil and fold it up and put it on the end of a plastic hair comb so we had two little prongs that could be inserted into a plug outlet. When you inserted the foil it would go POOF! and make a small explosion. Once we did this at church and the explosions was much more than what we expected. Flames shot out of the plug and all the lights in the building went out. I am happy that we did not burn the place to the ground. I was scared enough from this that I never did it again.

Also once we shredded up bags and bags of news paper and spread it out over the our bishop's lawn. It was a mean thing to do because it was hard to clean up and really all you could do was mow over it to make and over time it went away. Not sure why we did that. He was a good bishop and we quite liked him.

I'm afraid all I can offer is some TP-ing of various sunday school and seminary teacher's yards. This was done in the spirit of "good clean fun," and not as malicious vandalism; the targets were people we liked.

One time, at a youth conference fireside (literally sitting around a campfire), a young man stood up with tears welling up in his eyes, ready to spill his guts. He told us he had gone through a very difficult time trying to repent of his erroneous ways and misdeeds. He started balling and proclaimed his trust in HF for helping him out. Then, with a very dramatic gesture, he pulled out a CD case. It was a Madonna CD. His voice was getting increasingly louder as he spoke to us of the damage this music had caused him. Then, in triumph, he exclaimed with fervor, "And now, I'm going to show the Lord my love for him and throw this (the CD) into the fire!"

My friend jumped to his feet and yelled, "No! I'll take it!"

LOL, my friend ruined the moment. The feeling this young man was trying to develop instantly vanished as chuckles were heard around the fire.

He was a very savvy businessman and knew he could trade it in for a The Who or Grateful Dead album.

This wasn't "while at church" or a function, but did have to do with Mormonism...

Before I was a member, a friend of mine stole a pack of smokes from him parents and we went into a Mormon ward house, into the cultural hall and under the fold-in bleachers. There we proceeded to smoke some of them. It wasn't on a Sunday, and being that it was over 30 years ago, not even sure what day it was except it was summer. It just seemed like a good place to go smoke ;) We were 12, and I recall coughing my ass off.

I have no idea how we didn't get busted when I later realized how just one nasty cigarette can stink up a place.

lostindc wrote:my first heavy third base activity occurred on a temple trip at the age of 15 in the van loaded with young adult leaders...man did that girl mess me up good.

You too? And here I thought that teacher was just being overly friendly!