Page 2 of 5
Re: Pornography defined by my church leaders
Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2011 11:31 am
by _Fiannan
Droopy wrote: No one where I live care about swimsuits and the bodies inside them nor how many times someone's masturbates.
If the Bishops where you live do not care about modest dress and masturbation, they are not doing their jobs and taking seriously their sacred callings as Bishops, and should step aside for those who do take those callings, and the above longstanding and thoroughly articulated Church standards and aspect of the law of chastity respectively.
Are you for real or what?
Re: Pornography defined by my church leaders
Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2011 12:23 pm
by _Some Schmo
just me wrote:Oh, and as a mother of a teenage boy I do believe the factory often has a mind of its own. Maybe getting up out of a chair is porn, too.
Yeah, I remember as a deacon that I seemed to sport wood every time I was about to pass the sacrament. I guess broken bread is pornography.
There's probably a yeast infection joke in there somewhere.
Re: Pornography defined by my church leaders
Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2011 1:10 pm
by _zeezrom
I would like to clarify that this type of questioning happened multiple times by multiple bishops and stake Pres counselors. It was not just the opinion of one man.
Joseph, you might be right about the SI swimsuit magazine. I have looked at only one in my whole life. It was in 6th grade when another boy brought it to class.
So, why did I tell the bishops and SP counselors I didn't have a porn problem if I did indeed look at swimsuits and Lands End catalogs? Because I hoped that somehow these images didn't count. I believed deep down I had a "porn problem" but wanted it to go away so I lied. Anyway, same old story... Never felt worthy and believed I wouldn't make it to heaven.
Re: Pornography defined by my church leaders
Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2011 1:20 pm
by _Molok
Z, did he actually use the term "sacred procreative power"?
Re: Pornography defined by my church leaders
Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2011 1:38 pm
by _zeezrom
That was used at least once and other times it was something just as vague.
Re: Pornography defined by my church leaders
Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2011 1:53 pm
by _Buffalo
just me wrote:So, basically women are porn. Nice.
I went to the beach the other day. There was porn everywhere!
Re: Pornography defined by my church leaders
Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2011 1:54 pm
by _Buffalo
zeezrom wrote:That was used at least once and other times it was something just as vague.
I would have lol'd at "sacred procreative power" as a euphemism for a boner. :D
Re: Pornography defined by my church leaders
Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2011 1:59 pm
by _Buffalo
Inconceivable wrote:just me wrote:So, basically women are porn. Nice.
So might there be a line we may subconciously draw when looking upon our spouse's attractiveness - particularly after all the years of messed up
pre-marital programming?
I imagine how this twisted up indoctrination can effect newly married kids wondering how "God" may permit them to
discover and develop a healthy intimacy. As a former Mormon I'm drawing on my own personal experience here. There's no handbook of instructions on the subject, except for forklore passed down by our parents (if they dare!), the Young Adult ward bishop that approved your temple recommend, perhaps the feelings you might have felt when making out with a previous significant other, or maybe even that filthy magazine you stumbled upon as a young kid.
Adding Mormon garments to your bride's wardrobe on the day of your wedding didn't help either, did it? They now remind me of that pigeon turd that hits the windshield as you're driving your new car off the lot.
For a religion that was started by a guy who couldn't keep it in his pants, Mormonism sure is a puritanical mess, isn't it?
Re: Pornography defined by my church leaders
Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2011 2:00 pm
by _sock puppet
kairos wrote:olde joke but still funny
bishop: so do you have a problem with masturbation?
priest: no, bishop, it works fine every time- what about you bishop-any problem?
maybe you are doing it wrong.
bishop: probably should hold off on those baptisms for the dead for a while
priest: why is that- do they have a problem with masturbation?
silent walk to office door-no touching on the shoulder.
k
An oldie, but a goodie. Thanks for the reminder, kairos.
Re: Pornography defined by my church leaders
Posted: Fri Jun 03, 2011 3:39 pm
by _Jason Bourne
why me wrote:
Ahhhhh.....no. But if your account is true, your bishop did. One bishop does not make a church. I know of bishops who would never ask such questions. What problem an exmember like you have is confusing your experiences with the lds church in general. No one where I live care about swimsuits and the bodies inside them nor how many times someone's masturbates.
I think that some bishops may ask a general question about chasity but that is it.
Yea but you really are not a Mormon Mr. Light Cotton.