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Did going inactive make me happy?

Posted: Wed Jun 29, 2011 9:41 pm
by _zeezrom
I started a new job about the same time I stopped going to church. I love my new job sooo much. In all the years in the workplace, this new job takes the cake. So here is my question:

Is going inactive causing so much joy in life generally that my new job just seems better? If I stayed at my old job, would I feel just as happy about my days?

How much of my increased happiness is related to stopping church activity and how much is related to other things? These are sort of rhetorical questions to lead up to this question:

Has anyone else experienced this type of thing? What did you attribute your increased happiness to? Church or something else?

Re: Did going inactive make me happy?

Posted: Wed Jun 29, 2011 9:44 pm
by _Runtu
I have said before that it wasn't until I left the church that I was able to deal with chronic depression and other issues. When you no longer have a reason to tell yourself you're happy, you can see things more clearly. I know I did.

I'm happy now, but I guess I'd say I'm happy in a different way. I'm comfortable with myself and content in ways I never was in the church. Of course, if you had asked me at the time if I was happy and comfortable with myself, I would have said yes. I think I've just figured out how to live the kind of life I want and be happy in that.

And it goes without saying that I'm much happier on Sunday mornings than I used to be. :)

Re: Did going inactive make me happy?

Posted: Wed Jun 29, 2011 9:48 pm
by _just me
I really need to go inactive. I'm shooting for less active first. Baby steps. Then I can tell you if it made me happy. :D

Re: Did going inactive make me happy?

Posted: Wed Jun 29, 2011 9:58 pm
by _Mephitus
All i can say is, i find myself learning more about myself and what real love is staying in late to bed on sundays with my fiance than i ever found going to church.

Re: Did going inactive make me happy?

Posted: Wed Jun 29, 2011 9:59 pm
by _jon
I'm less active, I short of pick and choose and dodge Church at the slightest excuse. On the days we don't attend Church we have a much happier, better day.

Inactivity makes you happier providing you start from a position of being unhappily active. in my opinion...

Re: Did going inactive make me happy?

Posted: Wed Jun 29, 2011 10:14 pm
by _deafdumbdone
The answer to this question will vary by individual. For some people the church is a positive influence on their life, for some its not. The church is made for certain personality types and certain lifestyles, and when an individual's particular characteristics diverge too much from the ideal, that's when leaving the church can help. But leaving the church and happiness is a complex question and can't be answered ahead of time very easily. In particular circumstances you can make some better guesses. For example, if a gay person leaves the church and the ideology behind it's likely they will be happier.

I will also add that for many leaving the church can be very painful for a long time depending on their particular circumstances. But that after they get through it, the vast majority would probably say they have grown a lot from the experience and most find a way to be happy. However that transition period can be very difficult, it's kind of like a divorce.

Re: Did going inactive make me happy?

Posted: Wed Jun 29, 2011 11:04 pm
by _Some Schmo
Well, similar to you, zeez, I had a major lifestyle change that coincided with going inactive (I moved out of my parents' house). Did I become happier because I left home or because I left the church?

I have no doubt that it's a combination of both. Mormonism and my parents were a package deal.

One thing I can say for certain is that not being LDS allowed me to really find out who I was and be myself which in turn allowed me to far more easily make non-lds friends. From that perspective, leaving the church freed me to become a far happier person.

I don't doubt the church makes some people happier. It's hard for me to imagine how, but then, I'm not them.