Unrighteous Feelings and Emotions

[Guest]

Today in church we learned that certain feelings and emotions are unrighteous and/or tools of the devil. This teaching is unhealthy in the extreme for it teaches people to deny and supress how they are truly feeling rather than learn how to work through and cope with what might be considered negative or undesirable emotions.

Some of the things that were specifically mentioned were:

Hopelessness
Despair
Anger
Lust
.... (can't remember the last one)


Now, not of these feelings or emotions are sinful or unrighteous. I am sure that the religious will argue that lust is and we will just disagree on that. The others are in no way sinful or evil.

It took me a really long time to stop believing that I was wicked and evil for feeling angry. I mean, I tried to eradicate that emotion from myself. All I succeeded in doing was supressing it to a point where I couldn't control when it came bursting out of me. It was unhealthy and did not make me happier or more joyful.

We are even told from the pulpit that if we don't immediately forgive someone who has victimized us WE are in the deeper sin. This has horrible implications for victims of abuse. It is hard enough to struggle through the emotions and heal from something like that without adding guilt that they can't stop being pissed off at their abuser and just forgive them. I know of victims who have been told by ph leaders and LDS counselors that they need to just forgive, by the way, so this is explicitly taught.

Denying the full range of human emotions is denying our very humanity...our very soul. The core of what makes us human! To heap guilt on top of some of the more difficult human emotions is disgusting and irresponsible.

I did just have a moment of clarity, though. When an exmo is accused of being "angry" it really is just an additional villification because the very emotion of anger is considered wicked and evil.

As much as I'd like life to be rainbows and unicorns all the time that is not our reality. I have not ever met a single human being who could go through life feeling nothing but a fulness of joy and happiness every second of every day. That is not what the human experience is. The church is always dogging on "fleeting happiness" and pleasure. It claims to have some sort of alternative joy and happiness that is...what...ever present? I have never met a Mormon who had joy and happiness ever present as an emotional state. So, whatever it is they think they have that nobody else does....is an illusion.

[_Blixa]

It's even more distressing, just me, when you think of all the ways that such a lesson could have been truly helpful and offered people many ways to explore and deal with their emotions.

[_Jersey Girl]

Anger is unrighteous? Whoa! Wait a second...let's take a look at this scene found in the Gospel of John, chapter 2 and beginning at verse 13 and ask ourselves, WWJD?

Here's exactly what he reportedly did:

And the Jews' passover was at hand, and Jesus went up to Jerusalem,
And found in the temple those that sold oxen and sheep and doves, and the changers of money sitting:
And when he had made a scourge of small cords, he drove them all out of the temple, and the sheep, and the oxen; and poured out the changers' money, and overthrew the tables;
And said unto them that sold doves, Take these things hence; make not my Father's house an house of merchandise.

Is this not a display of anger?
Is the anger justified or not justified?
Is the anger unrighteous?

Please...seriously.

[_beefcalf]

If I was in a position where I wanted to gain control over someone, or over a group of people, I can't think of a better way than to convince them that they are falling short of some unreachable standard.

The church's teaching on the 'natural man' being an enemy to God is a perfect example. They even admit that the standard set for mankind is so high that none of us can ever achieve it.

Make sure nobody can ever escape this system by making them believe that their fundamental nature is the problem: their anger, their sexual desire, their despair.

Now that you know how sub-standard you are, guess what? They've got a solution: swear fealty to their sub-diety and he will escort you past the bouncers guarding the gates of heaven (of course, only after you've given the exactly required handshake and spoken the super-secret password).

[_Jersey Girl]

I'll take Hopelessness and Despair for $200, Alex. :-)

Are hopelessness and despair unrighteous emotions?

What does Jesus have to say about these emotions? Let's look at Matthew chapter 5, beginning with verse 1. Bold and underlined emphasis, mine.

Matthew 5

1 And seeing the multitudes, he went up into a mountain: and when he was set, his disciples came unto him:

2 And he opened his mouth, and taught them, saying,

3 Blessed are the poor in spirit: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

4 Blessed are they that mourn: for they shall be comforted.

5 Blessed are the meek: for they shall inherit the earth.

6 Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst after righteousness: for they shall be filled.

7 Blessed are the merciful: for they shall obtain mercy.

8 Blessed are the pure in heart: for they shall see God.

9 Blessed are the peacemakers: for they shall be called the children of God.

10 Blessed are they which are persecuted for righteousness' sake: for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.

11 Blessed are ye, when men shall revile you, and persecute you, and shall say all manner of evil against you falsely, for my sake.

This leaves me to conclude that feelings of hopelessness and despair are not unrighteous in the least.

This also leaves me to conclude that the teachings of the LDS church are not Biblical.

[_just me]

Hopelessness and despair were specifically pointed out as "tools of the adversary" rather than being labeled unrighteous. But it was all in the same talk.

[_Jersey Girl]

BFF

We are even told from the pulpit that if we don't immediately forgive someone who has victimized us WE are in the deeper sin.

Oh. My. Freaking. Hell.

Forgiveness isn't something you give on demand. It is the result of a process one goes through in sifting through the aftermath of abuse, neglect or exploitation.

How DARE anyone preach such things from the pulpit as if the people they were addressing were robots who simply needed to push a button that says "forgive" without feeling and thinking it in their own hearts and minds.

Speaking only for myself now, our family suffered a horrible and traumatic tragedy earlier this year. The kind of tragedy that rips through your heart, your mind and tears the guts right out of you. I am *just now* at a point where I can begin to even consider forgiveness. Does God, according to the LDS church want me to simply pay lip service and say "I forgive you" up front or would God want me to mean it.

When Christ was being persecuted and tortured to death, he appealed to God and asked God to "forgive them Father, they know not what they do".

I do not under any circumstances believe it is the position of a Christian to think for a single second that we ARE Christ. I think it is our position to strive to follow His example.

Not push the "forgive" button without thoughtful consideration, reflection, understanding and sincerity.

[_Jersey Girl]

Hopelessness and despair were specifically pointed out as "tools of the adversary" rather than being labeled unrighteous. But it was all in the same talk.

I would see that differently. I think that events that lead to those feelings might be the tools of the adversary, not the feelings we have as a result.

[_just me]

Hopelessness and despair were specifically pointed out as "tools of the adversary" rather than being labeled unrighteous. But it was all in the same talk.

I would see that differently. I think that events that lead to those feelings might be the tools of the adversary, not the feelings we have as a result.

And the the message was given that we shouldn't feel those things...or give in to those feelings.

[_Hoops]

Now, not of these feelings or emotions are sinful or unrighteous.

Correct.

I am sure that the religious will argue that lust is and we will just disagree on that.

The way that lust is commonly defined no it isn't.

It took me a really long time to stop believing that I was wicked and evil for feeling angry.

That's a shame. Come on over to my church and meet a whole bunch of people who are angry to one degree or another.

I mean, I tried to eradicate that emotion from myself. All I succeeded in doing was supressing it to a point where I couldn't control when it came bursting out of me. It was unhealthy and did not make me happier or more joyful.

Here we part company. I seem to recall the latest research is that indulging in anger only serves to fuel more of it. No, I don't have a reference, it's just a memory of reading something and having it confirm what i had thought.

We are even told from the pulpit that if we don't immediately forgive someone who has victimized us WE are in the deeper sin.

Forgiveness is for us, not the one who wronged us. No reasonable person, in my opinion, expects one to forget. they're two different things.

This has horrible implications for victims of abuse. It is hard enough to struggle through the emotions and heal from something like that without adding guilt that they can't stop being pissed off at their abuser and just forgive them. I know of victims who have been told by ph leaders and LDS counselors that they need to just forgive, by the way, so this is explicitly taught.

Those leaders are just plain wrong.

Denying the full range of human emotions is denying our very humanity...our very soul. The core of what makes us human! To heap guilt on top of some of the more difficult human emotions is disgusting and irresponsible.

Indeed it does. The God that is preached in my church recognizes this.

I have not ever met a single human being who could go through life feeling nothing but a fulness of joy and happiness every second of every day.

me neither. That's life.

Again, this exemplifies what some of us find so toxic about Mormonism. Not much of what you described here is preached in a Christian church. Now, after some leave the LDS church, they think that any Chrisian church will be the same. Perhaps this is why I'm so adamant that Ldsism is not Christian, so that when one leaves they might be open to a different, better expression of who God is.