Top Ten Reasons Gladys Knight is Mormon
Posted: Mon Oct 03, 2011 6:32 pm
Top Ten Reasons Gladys Knight is Mormon
Number 10 - She heard that Mormon’s blindly follow the Mormon Profits advice and is hoping to get him to command Mormon to buy her latest album.
Number 9 - Loves funky underwear and “man, o’man, ain’t noth’n crazier than Mormon underwear.”
Number 8 - Misunderstood the Curse of Cain doctrine and thought the Mormon Missionaries were saying “Cousin Cain” and if Mormonism is good enough for Cousin Cain its good enough for her.
Number 7 - Loves color contrast and there is nothing more contrasting than an African American dressed in Mormon Temple clothes in the Celestial room.
Number 6 - Got tired of up-beat and snappy music and “Lawrd knows there ain’t noth’n slower than MoTab.”
Number 5 - Thought that Mitt Romney was a liberal Democrat and wanted to support his liberal agenda when he ran for President.
Number 4 - Hoping to be a door greeter at the City Creek Center Mall and heard you have a better chance of being hired in Utah if you’re a Mormon
Number 3 - Didn’t know what to do with 10% of her money
Number 2 - Was too late to join the other Celebrities and become a Scientologist
Number 1 - She’s Bat Sh*t Crazy
Number 10 - She heard that Mormon’s blindly follow the Mormon Profits advice and is hoping to get him to command Mormon to buy her latest album.
Number 9 - Loves funky underwear and “man, o’man, ain’t noth’n crazier than Mormon underwear.”
Number 8 - Misunderstood the Curse of Cain doctrine and thought the Mormon Missionaries were saying “Cousin Cain” and if Mormonism is good enough for Cousin Cain its good enough for her.
Number 7 - Loves color contrast and there is nothing more contrasting than an African American dressed in Mormon Temple clothes in the Celestial room.
Number 6 - Got tired of up-beat and snappy music and “Lawrd knows there ain’t noth’n slower than MoTab.”
Number 5 - Thought that Mitt Romney was a liberal Democrat and wanted to support his liberal agenda when he ran for President.
Number 4 - Hoping to be a door greeter at the City Creek Center Mall and heard you have a better chance of being hired in Utah if you’re a Mormon
Number 3 - Didn’t know what to do with 10% of her money
Number 2 - Was too late to join the other Celebrities and become a Scientologist
Number 1 - She’s Bat Sh*t Crazy