Meeting with Bishop: Faith is a Choice
Posted: Thu Nov 24, 2011 5:46 pm
Happy Thanksgiving!
Last night, my wife and I spent a little over an hour in the bishop's office. It was a formal meeting where he desired to understand what caused us to stop going to church. I assume he also intended to share his feelings and beliefs with us, which is to be expected.
Twenty minutes into the conversation, the bishop asked us about our belief in the Bible and God. I told him frankly that I don't believe in either one then explained that I find beauty and meaning in religious acts of worship and teachings. He seemed surprised and followed my statement with a question about what caused "my testimony to be crushed after all that I had grown up with and learned over the years." I wanted to argue that nothing was crushed but rather, I feel much was expanded and that I have come out of a cave. I didn't think it would help to say it so I held my tongue.
Anyway, he made a comment at minute 38 that I found interesting. Here is an excerpt:
Bish: "Tell me, how is your life? Because when your beliefs have changed so dramatically, it has to impact choices that you make - the way you live your life, and the way you are raising your kids. It's probably much different now than it was 3 years ago."
Me: "Hmmm, I don't think so. We still work with our children to be responsible, get their homework done, don't disrespect us, be kind to others."
my wife: "We have chilled out quite a bit. But I see the way we chilled out as healthy."
10 minutes later, he asks, "[Looking at my wife] How do you raise your kids? Do you teach them to believe in God, or... [looking at me] do you expound your beliefs to your children at home... how do you do that?"
Me: "We encourage them to ask."
my wife recounted a recent experience with our son in which they talked openly about God.
The bishop ended with a sort of punch line, and take-away message: "faith is a choice." He followed up with a reading of some verses in 1 Corinthians speaking of Jesus.
I came away with this discussion feeling god. I'm glad we didn't refuse to meet with him. I'm glad he knows at least some of what we have gone through. Most of all, I think it helped my wife and I gain a little more closure between our religious differences between the two of us. In all, it was a healthy experience.
I've been thinking about his "faith is a choice" comment. I looked this phrase up on the Internet and was surprised to find an LDS talk among the first Google hits: http://LDS.org/general-conference/2010/ ... s?lang=eng
From this talk, we find this quote:
"Yes, faith is a choice, and it must be sought after and developed. Thus, we are responsible for our own faith. We are also responsible for our lack of faith. The choice is yours."
I see a lot of problems with this idea. First and foremost is that it deflates the religious experience to nothing more than a mental switch whithin each of our brains. It does not regard our environment and what we observe. How sad! Who is this God that can't act on us? Can't this God cause anything to happen to us regardless of what we choose?
In conclusion, I think most people that claim "faith is a choice" really don't mean it. If they stopped for a second to think it through, they would realize there is much more to it than a choice. I didn't just wake up one day and say, "Goshdarnit, I'm going to not believe in the church anymore." Information was laid before my eyes and ears and I did my best to form an opinion. I'm always open to change my opinion given better information that comes before my 5 senses.
Last night, my wife and I spent a little over an hour in the bishop's office. It was a formal meeting where he desired to understand what caused us to stop going to church. I assume he also intended to share his feelings and beliefs with us, which is to be expected.
Twenty minutes into the conversation, the bishop asked us about our belief in the Bible and God. I told him frankly that I don't believe in either one then explained that I find beauty and meaning in religious acts of worship and teachings. He seemed surprised and followed my statement with a question about what caused "my testimony to be crushed after all that I had grown up with and learned over the years." I wanted to argue that nothing was crushed but rather, I feel much was expanded and that I have come out of a cave. I didn't think it would help to say it so I held my tongue.
Anyway, he made a comment at minute 38 that I found interesting. Here is an excerpt:
Bish: "Tell me, how is your life? Because when your beliefs have changed so dramatically, it has to impact choices that you make - the way you live your life, and the way you are raising your kids. It's probably much different now than it was 3 years ago."
Me: "Hmmm, I don't think so. We still work with our children to be responsible, get their homework done, don't disrespect us, be kind to others."
my wife: "We have chilled out quite a bit. But I see the way we chilled out as healthy."
10 minutes later, he asks, "[Looking at my wife] How do you raise your kids? Do you teach them to believe in God, or... [looking at me] do you expound your beliefs to your children at home... how do you do that?"
Me: "We encourage them to ask."
my wife recounted a recent experience with our son in which they talked openly about God.
The bishop ended with a sort of punch line, and take-away message: "faith is a choice." He followed up with a reading of some verses in 1 Corinthians speaking of Jesus.
I came away with this discussion feeling god. I'm glad we didn't refuse to meet with him. I'm glad he knows at least some of what we have gone through. Most of all, I think it helped my wife and I gain a little more closure between our religious differences between the two of us. In all, it was a healthy experience.
I've been thinking about his "faith is a choice" comment. I looked this phrase up on the Internet and was surprised to find an LDS talk among the first Google hits: http://LDS.org/general-conference/2010/ ... s?lang=eng
From this talk, we find this quote:
"Yes, faith is a choice, and it must be sought after and developed. Thus, we are responsible for our own faith. We are also responsible for our lack of faith. The choice is yours."
I see a lot of problems with this idea. First and foremost is that it deflates the religious experience to nothing more than a mental switch whithin each of our brains. It does not regard our environment and what we observe. How sad! Who is this God that can't act on us? Can't this God cause anything to happen to us regardless of what we choose?
In conclusion, I think most people that claim "faith is a choice" really don't mean it. If they stopped for a second to think it through, they would realize there is much more to it than a choice. I didn't just wake up one day and say, "Goshdarnit, I'm going to not believe in the church anymore." Information was laid before my eyes and ears and I did my best to form an opinion. I'm always open to change my opinion given better information that comes before my 5 senses.