I have mocked the LDS "prophets, seers and revelators" in many, many ways.
How come the Old Testament God hasn't unleased she-bears on me?
Where are God's she-bears when He needs them?
-
_sock puppet
- _Emeritus
- Posts: 17063
- Joined: Fri Jul 23, 2010 2:52 pm
-
_moksha
- _Emeritus
- Posts: 22508
- Joined: Fri Oct 27, 2006 8:42 pm
Re: Where are God's she-bears when He needs them?
sock puppet wrote:How come the Old Testament God hasn't unleased she-bears on me?
He is waiting for you to honestly answer your wife, when she asks you how she looks in her new skinny jeans.
Cry Heaven and let loose the Penguins of Peace
-
_Fence Sitter
- _Emeritus
- Posts: 8862
- Joined: Sat Oct 02, 2010 3:49 pm
Re: Where are God's she-bears when He needs them?
sock puppet wrote:I have mocked the LDS "prophets, seers and revelators" in many, many ways.
How come the Old Testament God hasn't unleased she-bears on me?
Maybe if you were to suggest a years supply of minoxidil in the 1st presidency's vault you might get better results. It has been clinically tested.
"Any over-ritualized religion since the dawn of time can make its priests say yes, we know, it is rotten, and hard luck, but just do as we say, keep at the ritual, stick it out, give us your money and you'll end up with the angels in heaven for evermore."
-
_harmony
- _Emeritus
- Posts: 18195
- Joined: Fri Oct 27, 2006 1:35 am
Re: Where are God's she-bears when He needs them?
sock puppet wrote:I have mocked the LDS "prophets, seers and revelators" in many, many ways.
How come the Old Testament God hasn't unleased she-bears on me?
They're an endangered species. Maybe you could get by with she-mice?
(Nevo, Jan 23) And the Melchizedek Priesthood may not have been restored until the summer of 1830, several months after the organization of the Church.
-
_Hoops
- _Emeritus
- Posts: 2863
- Joined: Sun Jul 29, 2007 5:11 am
Re: Where are God's she-bears when He needs them?
Maybe you have too much hair still?
-
_sock puppet
- _Emeritus
- Posts: 17063
- Joined: Fri Jul 23, 2010 2:52 pm
Re: Where are God's she-bears when He needs them?
moksha wrote:sock puppet wrote:How come the Old Testament God hasn't unleased she-bears on me?
He is waiting for you to honestly answer your wife, when she asks you how she looks in her new skinny jeans.
Honestly, Penguin, she looks extremely hot when she wears skinny jeans--about three days a week. If it were up to me, it would be seven days a week.
-
_sock puppet
- _Emeritus
- Posts: 17063
- Joined: Fri Jul 23, 2010 2:52 pm
Re: Where are God's she-bears when He needs them?
Hoops wrote:Maybe you have too much hair still?
I think I know 6 other posters here who have met me in person who would dispel that I yet have too much hair by any standard. But, hoops, I thank you for the kind implication.
-
_sock puppet
- _Emeritus
- Posts: 17063
- Joined: Fri Jul 23, 2010 2:52 pm
Re: Where are God's she-bears when He needs them?
harmony wrote:sock puppet wrote:I have mocked the LDS "prophets, seers and revelators" in many, many ways.
How come the Old Testament God hasn't unleased she-bears on me?
They're an endangered species. Maybe you could get by with she-mice?
Egads, harmony. Death by a thousand cuts--er, a thousand mice bites. I'd rather be attacked by she-bears, truly.
-
_harmony
- _Emeritus
- Posts: 18195
- Joined: Fri Oct 27, 2006 1:35 am
Re: Where are God's she-bears when He needs them?
sock puppet wrote:Honestly, Penguin, she looks extremely hot when she wears skinny jeans--about three days a week. If it were up to me, it would be seven days a week.
Obviously not a student at BYU-I.
(Nevo, Jan 23) And the Melchizedek Priesthood may not have been restored until the summer of 1830, several months after the organization of the Church.
-
_sock puppet
- _Emeritus
- Posts: 17063
- Joined: Fri Jul 23, 2010 2:52 pm
Re: Where are God's she-bears when He needs them?
harmony wrote:sock puppet wrote:Honestly, Penguin, she looks extremely hot when she wears skinny jeans--about three days a week. If it were up to me, it would be seven days a week.
Obviously not a student at BYU-I.
No. At my age, I'd get arrested if she were. She is only 3 1/2 years younger than me, but people that don't know will often assume she is my daughter. We go to the same opthamologist every year for eye check ups. When she's done with her appointment, she makes one for me. The doctor comments every year on what a lovely daughter I have. I wish I had the same anti-aging genes that she does.