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Re: Where are God's she-bears when He needs them?
Posted: Sun Dec 11, 2011 5:06 am
by _zeezrom
Well, you haven't been too hard on the prophets yet. Maybe if you went to the outdoor theater at Deer Valley to watch Sound of Music and happened to run into TSM, then started throwing popcorn at him from the back row, then the she bears might be released. You probably need to be in the presence of a prophet and near bears at the same time.
Re: Where are God's she-bears when He needs them?
Posted: Sun Dec 11, 2011 5:12 am
by _sock puppet
zeezrom wrote:Well, you haven't been too hard on the prophets yet. Maybe if you went to the outdoor theater at Deer Valley to watch Sound of Music and happened to run into TSM, then started throwing popcorn at him from the back row, then the she bears might be released. You probably need to be in the presence of a prophet and near bears at the same time.
Can't omnipotent god cause the she-bears to come to where I am and tear me up for ridiculing his prophets from here? What good is it being omnipotent if you cannot do at least that?
Re: Where are God's she-bears when He needs them?
Posted: Sun Dec 11, 2011 5:18 am
by _zeezrom
Then what is going to do with a couple of she-bears in the middle of some city? Then God would have to deal with PETA and possibly even the Sierra Club. Heaven forbid. You can see why God avoids such a catastrophe?
Re: Where are God's she-bears when He needs them?
Posted: Sun Dec 11, 2011 5:23 am
by _sock puppet
zeezrom wrote:Then what is going to do with a couple of she-bears in the middle of some city? Then God would have to deal with PETA and possibly even the Sierra Club. Heaven forbid. You can see why God avoids such a catastrophe?
Yeah, God is doing about as good in avoiding and alleviating animal suffering across the globe as he is human suffering in the third world countries and the ghettos in first world countries.
Re: Where are God's she-bears when He needs them?
Posted: Sun Dec 11, 2011 6:29 am
by _ludwigm
sock puppet wrote: The doctor comments every year on what a lovely daughter I have.
Warning: Next year You must prepare Your answer to a proposal.
Re: Where are God's she-bears when He needs them?
Posted: Sun Dec 11, 2011 7:38 am
by _lovedoggies
[quote="sock puppet"]I have mocked the LDS "prophets, seers and revelators" in many, many ways.
How come the Old Testament God hasn't unleased she-bears on me?
Maybe she-bears like sock puppets. I think the smiting is coming in 2012. No wait...is that Mel Gibson?
Re: Where are God's she-bears when He needs them?
Posted: Sun Dec 11, 2011 10:59 am
by _Chap
sock puppet wrote:Can't omnipotent god cause the she-bears to come to where I am and tear me up for ridiculing his prophets from here? What good is it being omnipotent if you cannot do at least that?
He sent you Belmont instead. Resources are stretched nowadays, and it's the best he can do.
Unlike bears, however, you can always put Belmont on 'ignore'.
Re: Where are God's she-bears when He needs them?
Posted: Sun Dec 11, 2011 11:31 am
by _Doctor CamNC4Me
sock puppet wrote:I have mocked the LDS "prophets, seers and revelators" in many, many ways.
How come the Old Testament God hasn't unleased she-bears on me?
Well, I heard you've wrestled a few she-bears in your time...
*Oh, no I di'in't!*
Re: Where are God's she-bears when He needs them?
Posted: Sun Dec 11, 2011 2:49 pm
by _sock puppet
ludwigm wrote:sock puppet wrote: The doctor comments every year on what a lovely daughter I have.
Warning: Next year You must prepare Your answer to a proposal.
Yeah, if the opthamologist asks me for my 'daughter's' hand in marriage, what would be the best quip to answer him back?
Re: Where are God's she-bears when He needs them?
Posted: Sun Dec 11, 2011 3:12 pm
by _sock puppet
Chap wrote:sock puppet wrote:Can't omnipotent god cause the she-bears to come to where I am and tear me up for ridiculing his prophets from here? What good is it being omnipotent if you cannot do at least that?
He sent you Belmont instead. Resources are stretched nowadays, and it's the best he can do.
Unlike bears, however, you can always put Belmont on 'ignore'.
Are you suggesting that Simon < two she-bears? Are you suggesting that my mockery of the prophets < the mockery by the youths that Elisha encountered?
Times must be tough for God these days.