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Why Are Leftists/Apostates Obsessed with Masturbation?
Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 3:17 am
by _Droopy
In reply to the "Did the bishop ever ask you if you masturbate" poll, I thought a more thorough and timely poll would be apropos.
Re: Why Are Leftists/Apostates Obsessed with Masturbation?
Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 3:19 am
by _Blixa
your
Re: Why Are Leftists/Apostates Obsessed with Masturbation?
Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 3:34 am
by _sock puppet
Droop,
You left out the obvious answer choice: All bishops who ask teenagers about masturbation are leftist/apostates.
Re: Why Are Leftists/Apostates Obsessed with Masturbation?
Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 3:34 am
by _Runtu
I didn't realize that Mark Peterson, Boyd Packer, and Vaughn Featherstone were leftist apostates. I learn something new every day.
Re: Why Are Leftists/Apostates Obsessed with Masturbation?
Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 3:50 am
by _Runtu
By the way, I'm not obsessed about masturbation. It's kind of lost its scary, evil, forbidden charms since I realized that my church leaders were wrong to make such a huge fuss about it.
Re: Why Are Leftists/Apostates Obsessed with Masturbation?
Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 4:20 am
by _zeezrom
I voted it's wrong therefore cool. So obvious. I didn't even read the rest of the list it was so obvious.
It would be pretty boring if it wasn't a little wrong. I used to consider it a miracle that my sacred reproductive powers were never aroused in the Celestial Room. Now I realize the real reason is because it was so utterly good in there.
Wait, Droopy! You tricked me! You started this thread because you feel bad about doing it? Rest assured, I am here for you, my friend. Hey, you never took me up on my offer to tour the Las Vegas wastewater treatment plant. Why not?
Re: Why Are Leftists/Apostates Obsessed with Masturbation?
Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 5:05 am
by _Shulem
Droopy,
I'm moving to the Ilume on Cedar Springs Rd. on Jan 2nd. I will be under the full power of the Satanic gay god.
Here is the heated pool! I'll be there.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a-WGmgRSxRcPaul O
Re: Why Are Leftists/Apostates Obsessed with Masturbation?
Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 5:59 am
by _bcspace
What leftists do with their brains is analogous to what they do with their hands. by the way, I couldn't vote "form submitted was invalid'.
Re: Why Are Leftists/Apostates Obsessed with Masturbation?
Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 6:18 am
by _Zelder
bcspace wrote:What leftists do with their brains is analogous to what they do with their hands. by the way, I couldn't vote "form submitted was invalid'.
Can you honestly say you have never masturbated? Almost every normal healthy human being across all cultures and throughout all time has masturbated. It's part of the human experience. It is neurotic to feel guilty about a normal bodily function.
Re: Why Are Leftists/Apostates Obsessed with Masturbation?
Posted: Wed Dec 21, 2011 6:52 am
by _bcspace
Can you honestly say you have never masturbated?
I can honestly say I've never been asked if I have in any priesthood interview, bishop or stake pres. or mission pres. or higher. That would be since the 1970's when I had my first such interviews.
It is neurotic to feel guilty about a normal bodily function.
Good thing I don't feel neurotic about it then. Leftists and Apostates though, especially the latter, are constantly bringing it up, making it some sort of gold standard or honor.