Ten reasons for voting against gay marriage

[_Panopticon]

http://www.lolgod.blogspot.com/2012/05/top-10-reasons-against-gay-marriage.html

Some people have asked me why I speak out so frequently on marriage equality. The answer is that the marriage relationship is a human right. It is wrong, everywhere, and always, to have one group of humans who value a right to deny another group of humans from enjoying the same right.

Still, there are some reasons for voting against gay marriage. They include:

1. Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning,
2. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
3. Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behaviour. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
4. Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
5. Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Brittany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would he destroyed.
6. Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.
7. Obviously, gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
8. Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.
9. Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
10. Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life expectancy.

[_zeezrom]

I'm finally starting to warm up to polyester so your #1 doesn't hold any water. Take, for example, exhibit A.



I think most of America would be fine with this.

:)

[_Quasimodo]

http://www.lolgod.blogspot.com/2012/05/top-10-reasons-against-gay-marriage.html

Some people have asked me why I speak out so frequently on marriage equality. The answer is that the marriage relationship is a human right. It is wrong, everywhere, and always, to have one group of humans who value a right to deny another group of humans from enjoying the same right.

Still, there are some reasons for voting against gay marriage. They include:

1. Being gay is not natural. Real Americans always reject unnatural things like eyeglasses, polyester, and air conditioning,
2. Gay marriage will encourage people to be gay, in the same way that hanging around tall people will make you tall.
3. Legalizing gay marriage will open the door to all kinds of crazy behaviour. People may even wish to marry their pets because a dog has legal standing and can sign a marriage contract.
4. Straight marriage has been around a long time and hasn't changed at all; women are still property, blacks still can't marry whites, and divorce is still illegal.
5. Straight marriage will be less meaningful if gay marriage were allowed; the sanctity of Brittany Spears' 55-hour just-for-fun marriage would he destroyed.
6. Straight marriages are valid because they produce children. Gay couples, infertile couples, and old people shouldn't be allowed to marry because our orphanages aren't full yet, and the world needs more children.
7. Obviously, gay parents will raise gay children, since straight parents only raise straight children.
8. Gay marriage is not supported by religion. In a theocracy like ours, the values of one religion are imposed on the entire country. That's why we have only one religion in America.
9. Children can never succeed without a male and a female role model at home. That's why we as a society expressly forbid single parents to raise children.
10. Gay marriage will change the foundation of society; we could never adapt to new social norms. Just like we haven't adapted to cars, the service-sector economy, or longer life expectancy.

Thanks, Panopticon! Very clever. I'm going to try and memorize these ten for my next conversation with a fundamentalist guy I know.

[_zeezrom]

I think it's pretty damn clear the root of opposition to gay marriage is the "eww" factor. When it comes right down to it, that is what their reasoning boils to.

[_Quasimodo]

I think it's pretty damn clear the root of opposition to gay marriage is the "eww" factor. When it comes right down to it, that is what their reasoning boils to.

Agreed! Like people who won't taste sushi... it just seems icky. I'm glad they are not trying to stop the rest of us from eating it.

[_bcspace]

I think it's pretty damn clear the root of opposition to gay marriage is the "eww" factor. When it comes right down to it, that is what their reasoning boils to

No, it has more to do with knowing that welfare, such as state recognition of gay marriage, isn't a right and that the state need only benefit the ideal.

[_zeezrom]

...the state need only benefit the ideal.

hmmm.

[_Darth J]

I think it's pretty damn clear the root of opposition to gay marriage is the "eww" factor. When it comes right down to it, that is what their reasoning boils to

No, it has more to do with knowing that welfare, such as state recognition of gay marriage, isn't a right and that the state need only benefit the ideal.

Not only is there no social utility in benefiting childless domestic partnerships on the basis of some asserted "ideal," your ideal is based on your religious views about what marriage is supposed to be, which is not a valid rational basis for denying marriage to same-sex couples. The Establishment Clause of the First Amendment does not permit that. The statement that "welfare, such as state recognition of gay marriage, isn't a right" is so devoid of meaning that it cannot even be critiqued.

[_Panopticon]

I think it's pretty damn clear the root of opposition to gay marriage is the "eww" factor. When it comes right down to it, that is what their reasoning boils to

No, it has more to do with knowing that welfare, such as state recognition of gay marriage, isn't a right and that the state need only benefit the ideal.

Then you would agree that it isn't a right for heteros either. I'm fine with that. Let's do away with the state-sponsored "marriage" and call it civil unions. If you want to get married, go to a church.

However, as long as marriage exists, it is wrong for one group of people, who claim the "right" to do something, to deny that right to other people. The key point is that gay couples want to be married like hetero couples. There is no principled reason for allowing one group to be married and denying the other group.

Racists used to make similar arguments, and almost nobody buys them now.

[_Buffalo]

I would 100% support a measure to make all Mormon temple marriages illegal until gay marriage is legal in all 50 states.