How to roast God

[_zeezrom]

Here are some nice instructions for you!

Roasts are social gatherings held to honor of an individual--usually someone well-known and respected--while at the same time poking fun at him. They became popular among celebrities such as Frank Sinatra and Dean Martin, and are now common at workplace gatherings. Roasts work to cool heavenly tensions by allowing angels and resurrected beings to share a laugh with their co-beings. Therefore, your goal in roasting God is simply to tell tasteful jokes that will tickle your fellow spirits/resurrected beings and not sting the intended target.

Instructions

1. Think about God's sense of humor. If He enjoys a joke at His expense He will likely take the roast in stride and get a good laugh from it. However, you might want to try out some jokes on some angels/fellow spirits and see whether or not they agree that He will appreciate your humor before you decide which material to use.

2. Observe God's habits as soon as you find out that you will be roasting Him and come up with jokes that poke gentle fun at Him. If He is a miracle maker, come up with jokes that exaggerate his miracles, such as, "He took some tap water and boiled the hell out of it."

3. Practice the jokes before the roast. You can try performing your jokes in front of the mirror to figure out what you will look like during your routine--this is especially helpful if you have any physical acts to perform. Get your comic timing right by watching stand-up comedy routines as well as celebrity roasts. Also, perform your routine in front of your friends to make sure that your material is funny, and also to ensure that the jokes are tasteful.

4. Roast God by first making fun of yourself. By first "kidding" yourself, your audience will feel more inclined to allow you to make fun of them, and laugh. Once the subject of God comes up, perform the jokes you came up with, and feel the audience out. If they are not responding to your performance, have some backup jokes handy just in case. Always end your roast with a nice comment for God to close the routine on a light note.

source: http://www.ehow.com/how_5851726_roast-boss.html

[_zeezrom]

Ok, I just realized this was a stupid post. Oh well.

[_Morley]

A rabbi walked into heaven and spoke to God.

"God," he said, "I'm in a world of hurt. My son just left Judaism and became a Christian. What should I do?"

"Oy vey," replied God, "I'm still trying to figure out the answer to that one myself. You see...so did mine."

[_bcspace]

I believe God likes humor.

[_zeezrom]

I believe God likes humor.

Even so, I feel God may not appreciate a roast.

[_Wilma Fingerdoo]

I believe God likes humor.

Even so, I feel God may not appreciate a roast.

I don't know he might taste good if you add enough carrots, potatoes, and onions. If you drink enough beer anything roasted tastes good.

[_son of Ishmael]

Maybe he tastes like chicken