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What's Romney's position on post-Enochian trade with Mexico?
Posted: Sat Sep 29, 2012 12:07 am
by _Gadianton
With TBMs fasting like crazy for "Brother Romney" in a mass effort to freeload on God's blessings, it's very possible that Romney will win, and the righteousness he will restore to our country will expedite the events prior to the second coming. Sock Puppet brought up the City of Enoch in another thread, and that got me thinking, What is Romney's plans for the return of Enoch? Surely, he believes as all church members the doctrine that the City of Enoch will come down from the sky and fill the Gulf of Mexico. Has he alerted FEMA about this? Because according to Church doctrine, this event will kill everyone in Missouri and neighboring states.
From an official church publication on BYU's website:
One may reasonably ask to where this city will return. Joseph Young Sr. notes that “Joseph Smith said . . . in the hearing of some of the saints still surviving, that the City of Enoch would again take its place in the identical spot from which it had been detached, now forming that chasm of the earth, filled with water, called the Gulf of Mexico” (12; see also Widtsoe 365).
http://rsc.BYU.edu/archived/book-mormon ... nderstandiBut most interesting to me is how this event will affect our national borders. I'm curious about Brother Romney's opinion, as he surely believes these matters of doctrine. Well anyway, given the size of the City, it should house at least 100,000,000 people, and it's going right next to the border. Is it possible that the Enochians will expand and provide a buffer between the US and Mexico? I think this would be fascinating, and quite a blessing for conservatives. Since Enoch was translated and "frozen in time" as it were, it will be behind the US in technology, but have a huge workforce -- almost the size of Mexico's -- of righteous, translated beings that never complain or get tired. They will dutifully work in their sweatshops around the clock to bring to pass God's mighty work of specialization and trade. Our nation will become richer than we'd ever imagined, finally, with an inferior neighboring country that treats us right, and we won't need to deal with Mexico anymore. What do you think Republicans, could things be getting massively better with Brother Romney as president, or what?
Re: What's Romney's position on post-Enochian trade with Mex
Posted: Sat Sep 29, 2012 12:35 am
by _sock puppet
Gadianton wrote:With TBMs fasting like crazy for "Brother Romney" in a mass effort to freeload on God's blessings, it's very possible that Romney will win, and the righteousness he will restore to our country will expedite the events prior to the second coming. Sock Puppet brought up the City of Enoch in another thread, and that got me thinking, What is Romney's plans for the return of Enoch? Surely, he believes as all church members the doctrine that the City of Enoch will come down from the sky and fill the Gulf of Mexico. Has he alerted FEMA about this? Because according to Church doctrine, this event will kill everyone in Missouri and neighboring states.
From an official church publication on BYU's website:
One may reasonably ask to where this city will return. Joseph Young Sr. notes that “Joseph Smith said . . . in the hearing of some of the saints still surviving, that the City of Enoch would again take its place in the identical spot from which it had been detached, now forming that chasm of the earth, filled with water, called the Gulf of Mexico” (12; see also Widtsoe 365).
http://rsc.BYU.edu/archived/book-mormon ... nderstandiBut most interesting to me is how this event will affect our national borders. I'm curious about Brother Romney's opinion, as he surely believes these matters of doctrine. Well anyway, given the size of the City, it should house at least 100,000,000 people, and it's going right next to the border. Is it possible that the Enochians will expand and provide a buffer between the US and Mexico? I think this would be fascinating, and quite a blessing for conservatives. Since Enoch was translated and "frozen in time" as it were, it will be behind the US in technology, but have a huge workforce -- almost the size of Mexico's -- of righteous, translated beings that never complain or get tired. They will dutifully work in their sweatshops around the clock to bring to pass God's mighty work of specialization and trade. Our nation will become richer than we'd ever imagined, finally, with an inferior neighboring country that treats us right, and we won't need to deal with Mexico anymore. What do you think Republicans, could things be getting massively better with Brother Romney as president, or what?
A workforce without any earned retirement or retiree health benefits or other entitlements that burden their effective rate of pay? I'll bet Toyota co-ops all those Enochians to work in U.S. plants cranking out Camrys.
Re: What's Romney's position on post-Enochian trade with Mex
Posted: Sat Sep 29, 2012 12:54 am
by _Kishkumen
The answer for this is simple:
Romney will create the means for himself and his wealthy friends to purchase the Gulf of Mexico. Then, when the City of Enoch arrives, he will force the inhabitants to buy the property before they can land their city on the spot, or, retroactively purchase it, if they have already landed. He will then see to it that he and his friends patent the DNA of its inhabitants, including all of the flora and fauna. He will distribute to his rich friends and family member exclusive rights to establish various monopolies to sell Enochian cable tv, radio, and other media. He will then declare the City of Enoch a tax free zone, move all of his friends and family there, and establish a fortified border around it. In a secret ceremony, he will have himself declared god-king of the city and take multiple wives. Finally, he will tell the rest of the country to go to hell, and never set foot in the US again.
Re: What's Romney's position on post-Enochian trade with Mex
Posted: Sat Sep 29, 2012 9:51 pm
by _Nightlion
I suppose nobody bothered to read my Enoch missive. I show that contrary to LDS adolescent hipster shots at doctrine and fable the City of Enoch was in a mountainous terrain and therefore did NOT jettison from the Gulf of Mexico. More dumb is the Mormon notion that they are in anywise capable of stepping foot in Zion, returning from any quarter, or if suddenly it springs up among us.
Moses 7
17 The fear of the Lord was upon all nations, so great was the glory of the Lord, which was upon his people. And the Lord blessed the land, and they were blessed upon the mountains, and upon the high places, and did flourish.
18 And the Lord called his people Zion, because they were of one heart and one mind, and dwelt in righteousness; and there was no poor among them. 
Re: What's Romney's position on post-Enochian trade with Mex
Posted: Sat Sep 29, 2012 10:39 pm
by _sock puppet
Kishkumen wrote:The answer for this is simple:
Romney will create the means for himself and his wealthy friends to purchase the Gulf of Mexico. Then, when the City of Enoch arrives, he will force the inhabitants to buy the property before they can land their city on the spot, or, retroactively purchase it, if they have already landed. He will then see to it that he and his friends patent the DNA of its inhabitants, including all of the flora and fauna. He will distribute to his rich friends and family member exclusive rights to establish various monopolies to sell Enochian cable tv, radio, and other media. He will then declare the City of Enoch a tax free zone, move all of his friends and family there, and establish a fortified border around it. In a secret ceremony, he will have himself declared god-king of the city and take multiple wives. Finally, he will tell the rest of the country to go to hell, and never set foot in the US again.
Are you suggesting Romney is the Second Coming of ... JSJr?