DiscussMormonism.com

madeleine wrote:Maybe, but they didn't need to lie about knowing my daughter in order to ask their questions. They could have just said that is what they are doing.

I don't think they thought they were lying. You obviously consider their statement dishonest, but as representatives of the ward, they probably felt they were speaking on behalf of the ward. "We" didn't mean "the two of us personally," but "our congregation." They probably assumed she had attended at some point. I don't think they were being dishonest, I think they were just trying to sound less sterile and more personable. That's not how you took it, and that's fine, but I doubt their intentions were to be dishonest. Having been on both sides of that kind of assumption, I think it's a much safer move not to assume someone is just straight lying.

madeleine wrote:It wasn't their visit that bugs me, it is lying about knowing my daughter, and that Mormons are still keeping tabs on her.

I don't think they were keeping tabs, I think her name just never got taken off of a list.

madeleine wrote:She is not baptized, so I don't know why they are keeping any records about her at all, showing up with made up stories, and making notes about someone they have never met.

It's just weird, to me.

That's fine, but when "weird to me" becomes "lying to me," you're not doing either of you any favors.

madeleine wrote:
Maybe, but they didn't need to lie about knowing my daughter in order to ask their questions. They could have just said that is what they are doing.

Wow......what an idea!

When the door opens, simply say what it is that you are doing at their door.

A profound and splendid concept!

Peace,
Ceeboo

maklelan wrote:
I don't think they thought they were lying. You obviously consider their statement dishonest, but as representatives of the ward, they probably felt they were speaking on behalf of the ward. "We" didn't mean "the two of us personally," but "our congregation." They probably assumed she had attended at some point. I don't think they were being dishonest, I think they were just trying to sound less sterile and more personable. That's not how you took it, and that's fine, but I doubt their intentions were to be dishonest. Having been on both sides of that kind of assumption, I think it's a much safer move not to assume someone is just straight lying.

Hard to assume someone isn't lying when what they are saying doesn't match to reality. But I see your point, though, no on in my house has stepped foot in a Mormon church for decades, let alone what would be our ward. We are 100% no-shows, for anything.

I don't think they were keeping tabs, I think her name just never got taken off of a list.

How does she get her name off this list? She isn't a member, so isn't going to send a resignation letter.

That's fine, but when "weird to me" becomes "lying to me," you're not doing either of you any favors.

Well, strangers showing up, asking questions about my daughter, and making statements that don't match to reality (lying), is weird. But I see your point, that they could have been making more assumptions about her than just being baptized.

maklelan, I think you might be right. Theirs was a stab in the dark, so to speak. The look on their faces when I told them she wasn't LDS, was one of, "that doesn't compute", and is why I told them more clearly, "she isn't baptized".

Thanks. :-)

madeleine wrote:How does she get her name off this list? She isn't a member, so isn't going to send a resignation letter.

Because you've notified them that she was never baptized, they should go let the clerk know she doesn't belong on the list. If she's not taken off then they are being negligent.

maklelan wrote:

madeleine wrote:How does she get her name off this list? She isn't a member, so isn't going to send a resignation letter.

Because you've notified them that she was never baptized, they should go let the clerk know she doesn't belong on the list. If she's not taken off then they are being negligent.

Good! If they (the general Mormon "they") show up again, I (or my daughter) will ask specifically that they fix their records.

maklelan wrote:

madeleine wrote:
Because you've notified them that she was never baptized, they should go let the clerk know she doesn't belong on the list. If she's not taken off then they are being negligent.

Good! If they (the general Mormon "they") show up again, I (or my daughter) will ask specifically that they fix their records.

It would seem that if she is over 18, it is not your call. You will need to inform your daughter that she needs to notify that ward or Bishop.

3sheets2thewind wrote:
It would seem that if she is over 18, it is not your call. You will need to inform your daughter that she needs to notify that ward or Bishop.

It seems to me it is the LDS record that is wrong. Asking to correct it isn't making a call about anything.

Fence Sitter wrote:
With the increased numbers of missionaries, I would expect this to happen again.

Hi, Fence Sitter. I peeked in on the forum to see if I could find any information about an increase in the number of missionaries, at least in my neck of the woods, and happened upon your comment here in Madeleine's thread.

I've seen a lot of missionaries lately, more than I've ever noticed before. Is the increase worldwide? Nationwide? Specific to the mission field in North America?

The weather here has been abysmal. Every time I see them out on bikes in the cold rain I wish they were home with their families, warm.

KA

madeleine wrote:

3sheets2thewind wrote:
It would seem that if she is over 18, it is not your call. You will need to inform your daughter that she needs to notify that ward or Bishop.

It seems to me it is the LDS record that is wrong. Asking to correct it isn't making a call about anything.

My thought is, that you can not request something for an adult. The Church seems to operate a bit in the same way, records for adults are not moved or otherwise edit unless at the request of the adult the record is about.