New Place Fund for John McLay

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_Analytics
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New Place Fund for John McLay

Post by _Analytics »

It's been nearly two years since that really touching story about the seminary teacher and his wife (John and Brooke McClay) was published on Mormon Stories (see here).

Getting his post-Mormon life going has been especially hard for John. He has gotten divorced, declared bankruptcy, totaled his car, and moved in with his parents. He is now working odd jobs and working on getting qualified to teach high school English.

Some friends are soliciting donations to help him get his own place again. As quoted here, this is what’s going on in his own words:

Generally, I do not hesitate to share when a kindness is done to me. However, I admit, in this instance, I proceed with ample hesitation. But, the person who contacted me, a dear friend, has asked that I share this link and a few comments publicly.

A fund has been set up to help me and my children as we seek to transition into a new place, as well as to make it through a difficult period.

{I have tears in my eyes.}

Many thoughts are running through my head. One of the loudest is simply (and sincerely): I do not deserve this.

But, then there is this thought: My children do.

I’ll be brief.

I am really struggling financially. In some ways, I blame myself. But, I am doing all I can to rebuild. I currently live with my parents. (There go many future dates, I know.) I filed for bankruptcy last summer. (Any remaining possible dates have now vanished.) I am working two jobs and have applied for a third. Also, I will be starting school again in January to earn my Utah State teacher’s license.

I am barely making ends meet and sometimes it feels like I will never climb out of this hole. Also, during the time I was unemployed and underemployed, Brooke, a dedicated and devoted mother, has worked insanely hard to meet the bulk of the financial needs of our children. I want to help more.

I am happy to report that things are looking up. Despite my accident this month (which will, in the end, result in nearly 3K for repairs), I have been feeling uncommonly optimistic about things. I believe this is because of my friends and family.

Regardless of what comes of this fund, I am deeply touched and filled with hope. I expect nothing. I am not wallowing in self-pity. I know that others are struggling, some more than me and my children. I am working hard to rebuild and checking my motives along the way. And I truly believe that everything is going to be okay.

I’m also confident that if I don’t soon find a place of my own, I might literally lose my mind. (I think my parents, two of the most kind and generous people I know, may have already lost theirs.)

One last thing: My friend, who wishes to remain anonymous, indicates that another anonymous donor has agreed to pay $1.00 for every Facebook “like” or “share” that occurs via the youcaring website before Sunday night, up to $500. {tears} You can simply like this post (here on my page), or go to the link below and either "like" or "share" via Facebook. These actions can be taken without contribution of any kind. I am grateful beyond my ability to express. How I love my family and friends.


If the kind folks of this forum feel as badly for John (and his parents, lol) as I do, please consider donating $20. Just for kicks, I’ll match the donations of all members of our charming trailer park community, up to $500 total (God knows there are worse things I’ve done with money).

http://www.youcaring.com/help-a-neighbo ... lay/115088

(For matching, send me a PM)
It’s relatively easy to agree that only Homo sapiens can speak about things that don’t really exist, and believe six impossible things before breakfast. You could never convince a monkey to give you a banana by promising him limitless bananas after death in monkey heaven.

-Yuval Noah Harari
_sasquatch
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Re: New Place Fund for John McLay

Post by _sasquatch »

John is a good man. I wish him the best going forward.
_Nevo
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Re: New Place Fund for John McLay

Post by _Nevo »

Thanks for bringing this to the board's attention, Analytics. You're a good soul.
_Eyepatch
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Re: New Place Fund for John McLay

Post by _Eyepatch »

I don't feel sorry that he has to "rebuild" his life...I feel sorry that he based his life's work on Mormon BS (teaching seminary) in the first place. He'll be far better off in the long run by jumping the leaky ship and working in general education. I watched all their videos and online interviews, and think that he is an honorable guy who was duped by BigBusiness ChurchCo.

Rebuilding can be one tough SOB.
"Man will never be free until the last king is strangled with the entrails of the last priest." - Denis Diderot
_robuchan
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Re: New Place Fund for John McLay

Post by _robuchan »

Why the divorce? They seemed like a happy couple, and they both were exiting the church together.
_Analytics
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Re: New Place Fund for John McLay

Post by _Analytics »

Eyepatch wrote:I don't feel sorry that he has to "rebuild" his life...I feel sorry that he based his life's work on Mormon BS (teaching seminary) in the first place. He'll be far better off in the long run by jumping the leaky ship and working in general education. I watched all their videos and online interviews, and think that he is an honorable guy who was duped by BigBusiness ChurchCo.

Rebuilding can be one tough SOB.

I totally agree. When you leave the church not only are you leaving the fradulant institution itself, you also leave the social support it brings, as well as the safety net it provides (such as it is). It's ironic that leaving the fraud sometimes actually causes you to need those other things more than ever.
It’s relatively easy to agree that only Homo sapiens can speak about things that don’t really exist, and believe six impossible things before breakfast. You could never convince a monkey to give you a banana by promising him limitless bananas after death in monkey heaven.

-Yuval Noah Harari
_Analytics
_Emeritus
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Joined: Thu Feb 15, 2007 9:24 pm

Re: New Place Fund for John McLay

Post by _Analytics »

robuchan wrote:Why the divorce? They seemed like a happy couple, and they both were exiting the church together.

I don't believe the details of it are public. In general, when you take off the masks the church makes you wear and become your authentic selves, you and your spouse might both be different people than you thought. As you then try to redefine your individual lives and your marriage, you might discover that you aren’t as compatible as you thought. Add to all that some extreme financial pressures, and a divorce isn’t all that surprising.
It’s relatively easy to agree that only Homo sapiens can speak about things that don’t really exist, and believe six impossible things before breakfast. You could never convince a monkey to give you a banana by promising him limitless bananas after death in monkey heaven.

-Yuval Noah Harari
_Polygamy-Porter
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Re: New Place Fund for John McLay

Post by _Polygamy-Porter »

Analytics wrote:
robuchan wrote:Why the divorce? They seemed like a happy couple, and they both were exiting the church together.

I don't believe the details of it are public. In general, when you take off the masks the church makes you wear and become your authentic selves, you and your spouse might both be different people than you thought. As you then try to redefine your individual lives and your marriage, you might discover that you aren’t as compatible as you thought. Add to all that some extreme financial pressures, and a divorce isn’t all that surprising.

I concur.

I'd venture to bet his wife changed the most.

For the most part, exmo men do the same as when they were Mormon. Work hard at providing a living for the family.

Women, especially stay at home mommies struggle the most after leaving the cult. Awash in choices.
New name: Boaz
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_Bailey
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Re: New Place Fund for John McLay

Post by _Bailey »

Thank you Analytics, for posting this. As an admin to the site, I have been contacted by a kind man who wishes to remain anonymous. He mentioned coming across a post on Mormon Discussions, so I did a quick internet search and found you here. The man does not know John personally, but because of your post, he learned of his story and wanted to do something. I just wanted you to know that because you wanted to help out, others wanted to help out, as well.

He asked that we encourage others to contribute and he will match their donation until Christmas, up to a total of $1,000. This man warmed my heart, and left me in awe yet again of the kindness and generosity of those all around us.

Let's make this happen! To max out the match, the goal is totaling 6K before Christmas Day. Please consider contributing and sharing this with your friends on Facebook, through email, message boards, groups-- anywhere to help get the word out. A sincere thanks and Merry Everything!
_ControlFreak
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Re: New Place Fund for John McLay

Post by _ControlFreak »

Thanks for bringing this up. I recently got a 10% (OK, technically 11%) raise and would be glad to share for a good cause.
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