The Bednar Dog and Pony Show

The catch-all forum for general topics and debates. Minimal moderation. Rated PG to PG-13.
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Shulem
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The Bednar Dog and Pony Show

Post by Shulem »

Bednar wrote:Sister Bednar and I are here today to tell you young people the name of the king in Facsimile No. 3, even King Pharaoh, whose name is given in the characters above his head. There is only one king we as Latter-day Saints need concern ourselves with and there is only one name that can save our Heavenly Father's children and that is Jesus Christ our Lord and Savior. So, let it be understood that any other name in the scriptures, whether in Facsimile No. 3, or anywhere else for that matter makes no difference. It's a moot point. The gospel is true.

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Bednar wrote: If I understand you correctly you're asking about the name "Shulem" represented by the characters above his hand and why is a prince dressed up as a woman?

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Bednar wrote:Look, the manner in which the name Shulem is spelled in Facsimile No. 3, is unimportant. What matters is that you take Jesus Christ into your life and apply the saving principles and ordinances of the gospel by remaining faithful and supporting your Church leaders.

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Sister Bednar wrote:Lot's of men in ancient Egypt dressed up as women to perform certain religious rites they felt were important to their pageantry and current clothing styles. Professor Hugh Nibley explained all of that in his academic writings.

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Shulem
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Re: The Bednar Dog and Pony Show

Post by Shulem »

Show Producer to Control wrote: STOP allowing questions about the Book of Abraham. Screen the calls and make sure the questions are faith promoting! Bednar doesn't look happy with those questions you've been allowing to slip through.

Why are the callers all been white? We need to hear from a Hispanic or someone of African heritage. Or get an Asian on the line.

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drumdude
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Re: The Bednar Dog and Pony Show

Post by drumdude »

She always looks like she's forcing a smile. Can't say I blame her, being trapped in a cult married to that reptile Bednar.
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Shulem
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Re: The Bednar Dog and Pony Show

Post by Shulem »

Game Show Host Bednar wrote:
CONGRATULATIONS, you've just won an all expenses paid trip to visit Temple Square where you will receive free lodging for two nights and VIP vouchers to tour all the available facilities.

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***RESTRICTIONS APPLY***

Meals not included.
Must wear a mask at all times.
Must wear Sunday best
No General Authority visitations.
Not valid on weekends
Nontransferable
Adults only children not permitted
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Shulem
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Re: The Bednar Dog and Pony Show

Post by Shulem »

drumdude wrote:
Fri Sep 17, 2021 8:55 pm
She always looks like she's forcing a smile. Can't say I blame her, being trapped in a cult married to that reptile Bednar.
Sister Bednar wrote:
You don't think I know how to smile?

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Shulem
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Re: The Bednar Dog and Pony Show

Post by Shulem »

Bednar wrote:
I can't recall ever having an argument with my beloved wife, not even once!

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Shulem
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Re: The Bednar Dog and Pony Show

Post by Shulem »

Sister Bednar wrote:
I love how we can look up our personal portolio and see how our fortunes have grown thanks to the generous long-term compensation from the Church.

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Shulem
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Re: The Bednar Dog and Pony Show

Post by Shulem »

Sister Bednar wrote:
Bishop, I rather think what my husband and I do in the bedroom together is private and personal, don't you think?

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How to evade the worthiness interview:

Don't ask don't tell!
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Shulem
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Re: The Bednar Dog and Pony Show

Post by Shulem »

Bednar wrote:
Yes, I've committed a few indiscretions of which I'm not proud of.

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Shulem
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Re: The Bednar Dog and Pony Show

Post by Shulem »

Game Show Host Bednar wrote:
Do we have a runner up for a consolation prize?

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