TOTAL Shoutout to Ya Dr. W!!!

[Shulem]

It's a miracle.

[Philo Sofee]

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0wJP80_Wcpk&t=82s

Nuthin but good analysis, fun, mockery and loud laughter on the Jaredite Barges as you so lovingly shared your stellar analysis with us lo those many years ago. I have reified the scholarship and praise be to thee Dr. W!!!

Hey Prof. Sofee,

Finally got around to viewing your podcast. (Only saw yesterday that there was a link to it on the board.) Experiencing your dramatic video presentation based on that long-ago post was a real treat.

Just to set the record straight, however, the shaft of light that appeared before me after our message exchange revealed no personage. It simply shown directly upon the old remote drive on which the digital artifact in question was to be found. Apparently, those who no longer believe do not rate personal appearances by heavenly messengers. It does leave one to wonder about the source of said shaft of light. FSM perhaps?

In any case, thanks for all the work. IMHO, it was entertaining and definitely worthwhile.

It was, indeed, my sincerely very good pleasure my dear friend... THANK YOU for your help in finding it again!

[Shulem]

• 8 barges

• 344 day journey

• Unknown number of people per barge

Suppose a barge had 4 people. The average person drinks 8 cups of water per day. Suppose they reduced their water usage to just 4 cups for all daily needs AND NO WATER FOR THE ANIMALS in suspended hibernation! That would require transporting over 300 gallons of water weighing about 3,000 pounds. How can that much water be lightly transported? Vessels of clay would have added a great deal more weight and numerous skinbags made from animal material would have to be maintained and preserved but NOT stacked because they would burst. Storage floorspace is limited!

It's a logistical impossibility. Can't be done. Game over for the Book of Mormon.

3000 Gallon Water Storage Tank:

[Shulem]

And it came to pass that when they had prepared all manner of food, that thereby they might subsist upon the water, and also food for their flocks and herds, and whatsoever beast or animal or fowl that they should carry with them—and it came to pass that when they had done all these things they got aboard of their vessels or barges, and set forth into the sea, commending themselves unto the Lord their God.

FLOCK, noun

1. A company or collection; applied to sheep and other small animals. A flock of sheep answers to a herd of larger cattle. But the word may sometimes perhaps be applied to larger beasts, and in the plural, flocks may include all kinds of domesticated animals.

2. A company or collection of fowls of any kind, and when applied to birds on the wing, a flight; as a flock of wild-geese; a flock of ducks; a flock of blackbirds. in the United States, flocks of wild-pigeons sometimes darken the air.

HERD, noun

1. A collection or assemblage; applied to beasts when feeding or driven together. We say, a herd of horses, oxen, cattle, camels, elephants, bucks, harts, and in Scripture, a herd of swine. But we say, a flock of sheep, goats, or birds. A number of cattle going to market is called a drove.

Can you imagine living and subsisting in an enclosed chamber with barnyard animals? This has to be the silliest thing I've read in all of scripture. It beats Noah's ark hands down or Jesus rising physically from the tomb -- it's so damn silly. I never believed it even in my most faithful days as a Mormon. I knew in my mind and heart that the story was just wrong. But I put it on the back burner of faith. Mormons today who believe this garbage need to have their heads check by a doctor.

Today, I solemnly testify that the story told in Ether is not true. It is pure fiction made up out of the mind of Joseph Smith. I also testify that there is no king's name in Facsimile No. 3. Joseph Smith made that up too.

Amen.

[DrW]

(SNIP)
and I’m thinking these things would fail catastrophically at ~ 15 feet. Anyone want to take a stab at this *cough* DR. W?

- Doc

Just realized that in responding to Doc Cam's question about catastrophic failure depth, the tacit assumption was that these barges were real.
Since they were figments of the imagination, Doc Cam's estimate is as valid as that of anyone else.
When it comes to imaginary barges, catastrophic failure at a depth of 15 feet (or any other depth) is a good estimate.

And while we are at it, Shulem's upthread image of a man standing next to a 300-gallon water tank makes the point about the impossibility of adequately provisioning such a barge voyage better than any words one could write.

[Shulem]

And while we are at it, Shulem's upthread image of a man standing next to a 300-gallon water tank makes the point about the impossibility of adequately provisioning such a barge voyage better than any words one could write.

Indeed, the amount of required fresh water stored on each barge for passengers and animals is staggering. Clean water is essential for survival. How they would store thousands of pounds of fresh water on lightly built craft the length of a mere tree is beyond all reason. It's pure fantasy! The flooring of primitive craft would not support the stress and weight of water bags or tanks. With four people on such a craft drinking just 4 cups of water a day for 344 days it becomes evident that primitive light constructive craft will not support the weight. The vessel would split apart before they could even ride the wild seas whereby the weight would smash the vessel from the inside out the moment they ride the waves of the first storm. It's all a bunch of Joseph Smith BS.

Behold, believe it NOT. The Book of Mormon is a lie.

[Shulem]

That would require transporting over 300 gallons of water weighing about 3,000 pounds.

No problem, I'll load 60 of these jugs on that straw barge whereby 4 people can have about 4 cups of day for their voyage. The animals get nothing; waste not.

[Shulem]

A goat begs the brother of Jared to take him on a barge to the New World.



Six months later on one of the barges:



Oink, oink, oink....

[Shulem]

How many toilets were on each barge? You'd think probably just one. That would make things easy and more manageable.

Suppose five Jaredites were on a single barge wherein they rode the stormy sea for three days and they couldn't open the door hatch to dump their toilet because of the storm. How might this be a problem? Would a single pot hold all the content? Five people defecating on a daily basis are going to produce at least 1 turd each including several cups of pee. Therefore, a three day period in which they are shut in will fill the toilet with at least 15 turds and 3 gallons or more of pee and waste. Then, the toilet pot has to be transported to the door and dumped into the ocean. The pot has to be properly rinsed. And don't fall into the ocean while cleaning it above deck!

What a nightmare.

[Moksha]

Would a single pot hold all the content? Five people defecating on a daily basis are going to produce at least 1 turd each including several cups of pee. Therefore, a three day period in which they are shut in will fill the toilet with at least 15 turds and 3 gallons or more of pee and waste. Then, the toilet pot has to be transported to the door and dumped into the ocean. The pot has to be properly rinsed. And don't fall into the ocean while cleaning it above deck!

What a nightmare.

You should pose this question to the Interpreter. Possibly they have an answer or could assign a BYU intern to formulate an answer which they could peer review by the Friday edition.