My cognitive abilities are a flickering candle in a tornado. My noggin has been ravaged by pharmaceuticals. Sanity giveth... but it taketh away. Caveat emptor.doubtingthomas wrote: ↑Wed May 08, 2024 9:53 pmWell, I'll acknowledge that you are one of the few intelligent people on this board, and we can at least have a discussion, unlike with these other geniuses.Doctor Steuss wrote: ↑Wed May 08, 2024 9:14 pmYou literally approvingly shared a study, less than a few weeks ago, that provided a strong argument against it. LMAO!
The very nature of romantic relationships makes the dramatic linear trend of psychosocial maturity paramount. Unless the teenager is a sociopath that lacks emotion, or is some kind of genetic freak with no epinephrine receptors, or a deficiency that's pared with a mutant liver that has somehow been spared hepatic steatosis.The study concluded that by age 16, young people can possess adult reasoning skills, but psychosocial maturity typically takes longer to develop. Of course, there are limitations; the study doesn't account for real-world behavior and competence, but that's what we have so far. However, I suspect that single moms (who had a rough childhood and had to grow up faster) are a lot more mature than your average US girl.
Additionally, I would agree that 17 and 19-year-olds are too young for lifelong commitments, but one doesn't need to be at peak reasoning capacity to be in a relationship. I doubt you'd argue that 30 year olds can't date people over 45. But maybe we do need laws to protect people over 45 from 30 year olds.
Relationships are emotional. Romantic relationships are exceptionally emotional. "Love" is rascally, and can make even the most rational person into an irrational psychopath (<<this space reserved for restraining orders>>).
On a more personal/anecdotal note: The concept of dating age gaps as we get older is interesting, and certainly something I've thought about. I imagine in previous generations, it probably didn't matter quite as much because, really what formative and life-altering events could two different people have in the late 1800's to early 1900's that a decade or two would make a huge difference. Now though, everything moves so fast. Technology, world events, the overall zeitgeist of generations. There are certain things that leave a mark on how you view the world, and how you respond to it. Growing up during the Great Recession would be vastly different than trying to make a living during the Great Recession. Coming of age, when computers were first entering homes and the workplace, and were a luxury item, would be vastly different than coming of age when it's common place for homes to have the equivalent of multiple computers. Being an adult, watching masses of people burn Dixie Chick albums, and call French Fries "Freedom Fries" is a (hopefully) life-altering thing, that shapes an overall view of history, current events, interactions with others, etc.
I've thought about dating again on occasion. For the most part though, the thought is unappealing to me. When I have thought about it though, I put the age cap at about 12 years (so between ages 32-56) I. My reasoning is super weird though on that. When I was 12, a classmate got pregnant, so in my mind, that's around the age threshold where someone could be the age of my child, or I could be the age of their child. Ultimately, I'd want someone who was in high school at the same time I was (my ex-wife is 1 year older than me), because I know that they'd have largely experienced the same world I did. The same formative experiences. The same geopolitical events. The same musical landmarks. The same pop culture trends. They would've largely had mentors the same ages as mine, teachers the same ages as mine, parents the same ages as mine. All of these things shape us in immeasurable ways.
There's just so many indescribable things that come with being born during a certain time frame. Things that I think we (and by that, I mean "me") easily take for granted. Things which have the potential to make an already difficult task (i.e. a healthy romantic relationship) more or less successful.