Some of you may have been wondering....

[_Roger Morrison]

Mr. Coffee, i've never surfed this forum before... Now i know why i did... YOU, Brother, have touched me like few others--no like none others--ever have. Your war-time experience is beyond my imagination... The loss of your son, as well, i can say nothing but, "i'm sorry for your loss, i appreciate the bond you shared." Thank you for sharing this with me/us.

You personify the reason i am against censuring on this board. Your words, or anyones, should be read by everyone in every forum. Unfortunately there are rules to accomodate sensitivities of those insensitive to the realities of real life, and unwarranted sufferings such as yours. Warm regards, deepest sympathies, and total respect, Roger

[_larryfulkerson]

Mr. Coffee, I've never surfed this forum before... Now I know why I did... YOU, Brother, have touched me like few others--no like none others--ever have. Your war-time experience is beyond my imagination... The loss of your son, as well, I can say nothing but, "I'm sorry for your loss, I appreciate the bond you shared." Thank you for sharing this with me/us.

You personify the reason I am against censuring on this board. Your words, or anyones, should be read by everyone in every forum. Unfortunately there are rules to accomodate sensitivities of those insensitive to the realities of real life, and
unwarranted sufferings such as yours. Warm regards, deepest sympathies, and total respect, Roger

Roger that. Mr. Coffee....maybe your writing could be therapy for your PTSD. I've been there ( with PTSD ) and I know it's no fun. I started a novel to write about the tragedy that was Vietnam and got through the first 6 chapters before I knew I had to quit, but maybe you could do it. It might help you release those demons inside you.

I'm really sorry about your loss.

[_beastie]

::::tears::::

[_Bond...James Bond]

Don't know what to say....sorry for your son. Hope you sort out the demons.

Bond

[_Dr. Shades]

My deepest condolences, fellow Devil Dog.

I'm really bad at this sort of thing. I'm afraid I don't know what to say.

[_Dr. Shades]

Hello Mister Coffee,

I really hope you don't mind if I ask these questions. If I'm being too insensitive or should leave well enough alone, then by all means ignore this post. However, I'm really confused about some of the things you wrote earlier. Would it be okay if I asked for clarification?

You wrote:

And then that onew day I witnessed the depths my seeming "freind" could go to.

Iwatched as they spread childrens toys along a path and spread traps amongst them.

Death traps, for chlidren.

Now these were the Croats you were defending setting traps for Serb children, right?

And she flew true. The truest shot I have or ever will fire. And I say that as a Marksman and a Marine.

She, Anna, as I named, flew with a perfection and hit with a soundness I'd rarely seen in a projectile.

She didn;t just hit, she HIT.

His head was just a stump from his upper jaw upwards. A few teeth and a quivering lump spurting blood was all thatr I saw as I cyucled the bolt and centered on the next man unlucky to have the same love of killing children. They would all die. it was inevitable.

NBothing woult stop me from wrecking Gods vengful frury on these hereitics.

I ever started to not notice when my sporters' chant changed from "fire, fire, fire" to "HOLD YOUR damned FIRE!".

And in that last glimpse of my scope, I saw him shake handes with a United States Marine...

Who is "him?" It couldn't have been the guy you had just hit, since he was quite obviously dead. If he was in the group you were drawing down on, how did he NOT notice that one of his number had just gotten shot?

"HOLD YOUT damned FIRE!"....

My shot went wild. I failed, my rifle failed. We failed to hit.

Wait a sec. . . I thought you scored the hit. Or was this a second shot? If it was a second shot, how did the guy you missed NOT notice that one of his group had just been shot?

I quickly recovered a sioght picture....

And there I saw a man in my uniform shaking ahnde with the same group of assholes that had just set explosives on childrens toys.

Did he know what they had been doing?

You see, by controlling that small group of SDerbs we "effectively" controlled thousands of square killometers.

Wait. . . I thought the trap-setters were the Croats you were defending, not Serbs.

I'd saved my spooters life and my own without firing a shot.

Is that 'cause you'd been aiming at the Marine by accident and would've been court-martialed? Even so, I thought you did fire a shot. Two actually, one that hit, one that missed.

Yeah, I looked inbto that gaze again....

Onbly this time if wasn;t a man I made, or in a place he choise....

I looked oin this pathetiutiuc, worthless failure of life that my penis has given issue to...

How could he have been worthless or a failure if he was still only a newborn?

I know it would hate me and try kelllllll;me.

So I ordered a nuclrear strick back.

We thought as one.....

I'm COMPLETELY confused by that. What form did this "nuclear strike back" take?

[_Jersey Girl]

Coffee,

I just wanted to pop in here and say that I'm still reading you. You might have figured out by now that I have a military "connection". Having said that, while some of us here might know what it's like to have our loved ones deployed, my guess is that almost none of us know what it's like to be in combat and the war isn't "real" to us.

Thank you for making it more real.

for what it's worth, I admire anyone who has the ability to write from their blood stream. It's raw, it's real and I appreciate that.

Jersey Girl

[_Mr. Coffee]

Now these were the Croats you were defending setting traps for Serb children, right?

Yes. The area we were watching over was right on the border of Croatia and Serbia. Bobby trapping toys was a common occurance there. In the US we have baseball for a national pasttime. The Croats have booobytraps and IEDs.

I'm COMPLETELY confused by that.

The rest of this chalk up to me being VERY damned DRUNK while writing and getting drunker by the moment. At that point my ability to tell a coherent narrative goes all to hell and I pretty much loose most of my sence of pacing, plotting, timing, ect...

As for the nuclear "strik" thing... I thing I was so pissed when I wrote that my thought process was "nuke 'em". At least that was a common thought I had towards the end of my time in Wonderful Sunny Serbcroastandia. Just nuke the poipulation centers, blame it on blackmarket russian nukes used by Ethnic Albanian Seperatists, and wash our hands of the area.