Preferences in Pantyhose

The Off-Topic forum for anything non-LDS related, such as sports or politics. Rated PG through PG-13.
_Jersey Girl
_Emeritus
Posts: 34407
Joined: Wed Oct 25, 2006 1:16 am

Preferences in Pantyhose

Post by _Jersey Girl »

Yes, you read it right. This ground breaking thread has been a long time coming. Considering the fact that this is a largely religion-related board where participants have often powder-keg differences of opinion ;-), I try from time to time to make an effort to draw the community together (yes I have special powers) in an effort to diffuse potentially explosive situations (there's one going on right now incase you haven't noticed) by searching for a topic that will unite us on the basis of common ground.

Pantyhose comes immediately to mind and why shouldn't it?

Most of us wear pantyhose or know someone who does. What brand is best? On what do we base our evaluations of pantyhose? Here are some thoughts to get us started in this profoundly relevant discussion. Let us turn our thoughts to pantyhose.

I actually remember when pantyhose first hit the market. It was a disgustingly thick and twisted product (literally) and made your legs look like you were wearing some sort of elastic thingy that old ladies wear. (Shut up, KA)

By comparison, today's pantyhose product is quite a leg up (yes, that was intended) from the first attempts at leg covering without garters (let's don't go there, okay?) though there are still some really crappy pantyhose's on the market which we, as a united community, will identify as the discussion unravels.

My favorite brand of pantyhose is both affordable and wearable. What the heck is it called...oh...No Nonsense Pantyhose. I prefer the more natural tones and like the sizing. No Nonsense Pantyhose never betrays you.

Which leads me to Penguin Pantyhose. You ladies know exactly what I mean! Penguin Pantyhose are the one's that wiggle down while you're wearing them and if you're unfortunately wearing a dress or skirt, you run (see? That was intentional too) the real risk of waddling around with your pantyhose wrapped around your ankles.

I ask you ladies and gentlemen who've had this experience, is there nothing more embarrassing than walking around trying to secretly hike up your Penguin Pantyhose in public? It is a disgusting practice and were the manufacturers of these diabolically unnerving products at all interested in quality, we wouldn't be here discussing it now or looking for a corner to back into to hike them up!

It is a travesty and very possibly a conspiracy by the radical misogynist underground faction!

What is there to do? How might we unite our collective forces and dollars in rooting out the Penguin Pantyhose element of this industry who tricks us out of our hard earned dollars?

Your thoughts please?

Jersey Girl
_KimberlyAnn
_Emeritus
Posts: 3171
Joined: Thu Mar 22, 2007 2:03 pm

Post by _KimberlyAnn »

What causes Penguin Pantyhose? Is it that the hose are too small? Too big? Made incorrectly?

I yanked my pantyhose up two weeks ago at church right there in front of service! It was mortifying, but I ran the real risk of them sliding right down my legs! I pulled them up, and they seemed to fit fine, but within a minute or two, I was waddling again!

I'm going to No-Nonsense at Jersey Girl's suggestion. I will return and report!

KA
_Jersey Girl
_Emeritus
Posts: 34407
Joined: Wed Oct 25, 2006 1:16 am

Post by _Jersey Girl »

For those of you who view this topic as trivial, the implications are more far reaching than you might imagine. I ask you brothers and sisters, what legacy would YOU like to pass on to your daughters? Is your wish for them a future of Penguin Pantyhose? Do you really want to see your offspring be made to waddle in the public square?

If not, I suggest you give this topic the deep thought it deserves. Only YOU can make a difference and let your contribution be a Queen Size One!
_skippy the dead
_Emeritus
Posts: 1676
Joined: Sat Jan 06, 2007 5:39 am

Post by _skippy the dead »

Fortunately, I haven't worn pantyhose in probably more than 10 years. And even then, I tended towards "thigh-highs", rather than a full pantyhose. The "penguin" phenomenon is all too real.

If I can remember that far back, I think I found some Calvin Klein pantyhose that seemed to stay up and not run that often. But that was so very long ago - maybe technology has improved since then?

(ps - wonderful thread! Much needed about now)
I may be going to hell in a bucket, babe / But at least I'm enjoying the ride.
-Grateful Dead (lyrics by John Perry Barlow)
_harmony
_Emeritus
Posts: 18195
Joined: Fri Oct 27, 2006 1:35 am

Post by _harmony »

Pantyhose are diabolical inventions only surpassed in treachery by the girdle and the bra. That said, I haven't worn them in many a year, about the time I retreated from that other medieval torture device: the bra.

I love knee highs, myself.
_Gazelam
_Emeritus
Posts: 5659
Joined: Thu Oct 26, 2006 2:06 am

Post by _Gazelam »

I liked it when my Mom bought the "Leggs" brand pantyhose, because the used to come in the little plastic eggs, and I got to play with them. I liked to put my star wars guys inside and use them as spaceships, or prisons or something, : )

Image
We can easily forgive a child who is afraid of the dark; the real tragedy of life is when men are afraid of the light. - Plato
_Mercury
_Emeritus
Posts: 5545
Joined: Tue Oct 24, 2006 2:14 pm

Post by _Mercury »

I prefer (not me, my wife) Black thigh highs.


SHIVER!!!!!!!!
And crawling on the planet's face
Some insects called the human race
Lost in time
And lost in space...and meaning
_Jersey Girl
_Emeritus
Posts: 34407
Joined: Wed Oct 25, 2006 1:16 am

Post by _Jersey Girl »

Mercury wrote:I prefer (not me, my wife) Black thigh highs.


SHIVER!!!!!!!!


Mercury,

Do not be ashamed of your pantyhose preferences! Which do you prefer on yourself?

;-P
_Jersey Girl
_Emeritus
Posts: 34407
Joined: Wed Oct 25, 2006 1:16 am

Post by _Jersey Girl »

Gazelam wrote:I liked it when my Mom bought the "Leggs" brand pantyhose, because the used to come in the little plastic eggs, and I got to play with them. I liked to put my star wars guys inside and use them as spaceships, or prisons or something, : )

Image


Yes, but where did you put your Penguins?

:-D
_Bond...James Bond
_Emeritus
Posts: 4627
Joined: Tue Nov 07, 2006 4:49 am

Post by _Bond...James Bond »

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0lUjhEHlh7s

....I love the scene in this movie where Robin's training his villagers and they're getting equipped, and at the end of th line of supplies is a bunch of those Leggs eggs and one of the men is popping them open for the soon to be soldiers.
"Whatever appears to be against the Book of Mormon is going to be overturned at some time in the future. So we can be pretty open minded."-charity 3/7/07
Post Reply