Unfortunate Bedazzler Accident: Celine Dion Concert Review

[_KimberlyAnn]

I went to a Celine Dion concert last night. I know. I applied a thick Teflon Wilco coating prior to exposing myself to Celine, in hopes of reducing the risk of musical infection.

Not being a Celine Dion fan, I didn't purchase tickets to the sold-out concert. But yesterday afternoon, an acquaintance called and offered me his tickets, as he wasn't able to attend. They were floor seat tickets, priced at $167.00 each plus fees and taxes. I accepted the offer, took his $400.00, and Courtney and I navigated our way downtown through oppressive traffic to hear the Titanic theme.

The first thing I noticed was that there were few straight men at the concert and those few looked as if they'd been dragged there kicking and screaming by their Celine-loving wives. Courtney and I were seated on the floor, near the back and center. We were, by far, the youngest two in our section. It's odd attending a concert where the man next to you smells like arthritis ointment. At least he said that I looked like Courtney's sister, instead of her mother. True, my mom would look like a spring chicken to that fella, but I don't care. I'm taking the compliment because it is true! ;)

Celine was actually a very gracious performer. She was comfortable with her banter and honestly put on a great show. The only problem was that she must have had a terrible bedazzling accident backstage, because the crotch of her pants was covered in rhinestones. It was truly odd. It was like, "Woo Hoo! Looky here! Yes, right down here! That's right. Check out my sparkly PoPo!" I've heard of vaginal rejuvenation, but sheesh. As we left the concert, Courtney actually said, "I didn't WANT to look at her crotch, but it was so sparkly!"

The musicians were good; the violinist, in particular. The only song of Celine Dion's that I've ever really liked is To Love You More. I got chills last night during that song, the violinist was so good. Overall, I was impressed. I went in thinking I'd dislike the concert, but I enjoyed myself. And Courtney loved it. Enjoying her enjoyment was the best part of the evening.

In spite of my Teflon Wilco coating, I did catch just a bit of an infection last night from Celine. I've been singing To Love You More all day.

"Believe me! I will make you see all the things that your heart needs to know! I'll be WAAAAITING for yoooou, here inside my heart! Let me be the one to loOOOve you mo-oh-oh-ore! Can't you see I can give you EVVVVERYTHING you neeeeeed!? Let me be the one to Love. You. More! Ohhh, oh, oh, ooooooooooooh, OOOOOhhhhooooooOOOOhhh, oh, oh!"

When I do the "oooOOOOhhh" part, Tarzan's hair along his spine stands up just a little. I think that means he likes it.

"I drove all niiiiiight to get to you. Is that alright?"

I am infected. Help?

KA
.
.

[_Blixa]

I don't know if you're familiar with Leslie Hall, KA. You might have seen her on Yo Gabba Gabba (among other places). But no one, not ever Celine, can touch the magic power of bedazzlement wielded by Ms. Hall. She is the owner and operator of The Gem Sweater Museum and here it is:

http://www.lesliehall.com/8-sweaters1.html

[_KimberlyAnn]

Blixa--before I forget to tell you: Blixa is now a Mii on my Wii! She looks just like you, but her hair is styled like that of your avatar.

Making Mii's is the best part of the Wii. I have dozens of hilarious Mii characters. I will make a Celine Dion Mii soon in remembrance of the concert.

The Gem Sweater Museum is amazing! I think I like "Spider's Paw" best. And those gold stretch pants go with everything, don't they?

KA

[_KimberlyAnn]

I found a video from last night's concert on YouTube.

Here's Celine's entrance and a bit of I Drove All Night:

http://youtube.com/watch?v=rRRXyDzl2ik

Court and I were somewhere in that crowd on the floor.

KA

[_skippy the dead]

I don't know if you're familiar with Leslie Hall, KA. You might have seen her on Yo Gabba Gabba (among other places). But no one, not ever Celine, can touch the magic power of bedazzlement wielded by Ms. Hall. She is the owner and operator of The Gem Sweater Museum and here it is:

http://www.lesliehall.com/8-sweaters1.html

I have seen Leslie Hall on Yo Gabba Gabba. I like her and her sparkliness.

[_skippy the dead]

"I didn't WANT to look at her crotch, but it was so sparkly!"

Oh. My. God. This is so funny for so many reasons, none of which would seem normal.

Your entire post was HI-larious. Thanks for a much appreciated laugh.

[_Blixa]

Blixa--before I forget to tell you: Blixa is now a Mii on my Wii! She looks just like you, but her hair is styled like that of your avatar.

Can you post a pic or send me one?

[_Dr. Shades]

Blixa is now a Mii on my Wii! . . . Making Mii's is the best part of the Wii. I have dozens of hilarious Mii characters. I will make a Celine Dion Mii soon in remembrance of the concert.

What the Hell is a "Mii?"

[_KimberlyAnn]

Shades, a Mii is a character/player created on the Wii gaming system. They're fun to make. Each player should have his/her own Mii. Also, Mii's can be created to resemble famous people and friends. My pets even have their own Mii representations, but in "human" form. We took a bit of artistic license with them. :)

I made a Scut Farkas Mii. He's the yellow-toothed villain from A Christmas Story. I have a Dr. Steuss Mii. I didn't have the option to make him pantsless, though, darn it. I have MishMagnet and SilentKid Mii's as well. I also created Mii's for my extended family and friends.

The odd thing is my MDB friends' Mii's are the peskiest of all. For some reason, they're always getting in my way in their big red cars at Mario Kart's Coconut Mall. Grrrrrrr...

Anyway, I need to figure out how to send my Mii's via email to my friends. I have wireless internet, and there's a way, but I stink at all things computerized. For the time being, I re-created Blixa's Mii on the net so I could post it for her. There were less options than on my Wii, but the result is similar. I think BlixaMii has little cleft on her chin on my Wii, but I didn't have that option online.

My girls and I take artistic license with our Mii's, so they're not exact representations. I makes my Mii's how I wants.

Here's BlixaMii:



*Blixa, I'm not sure if you wear reading glasses in real life, but you do on my Wii. They represent your professorhood. I also know you don't have the beauty mark, but I like it.*

KA

PS. Thanks, Skippy! I'm glad you liked it.

[_silentkid]

Great review! I fear the wrath of Celine's sparkly crotch. Didn't Southpark do a Celine episode? I can't remember. I should probably just Google to find out. Okay. I'll Google. Yes. The Not Without My Anus episode featuring Terrence and Philip. I don't think she wore the sequined banana hammock in it, though.

I need to take a trip to Oklahoma some time soon so I can take command of my Mii and come in last in a few Mario Kart races.