Page 1 of 2

Ouch!

Posted: Sat Oct 03, 2009 6:02 pm
by _JonasS
delete

Re: Ouch!

Posted: Sat Oct 03, 2009 7:32 pm
by _Gazelam
Pirate,
Sorry to hear you got caught up in a bad relationship. I'm glad you had enough of a sense of self worth to know to step away from someone that did not honor you.
Are you still wanting to serve a mission? If so it sounds like you have some repenting to do. Talk to your bishop and work towards your goal.

all the best
Gaz

Re: Ouch!

Posted: Sat Oct 03, 2009 8:58 pm
by _JonasS
I don't know what's real or not. He doesn't see why I had an issue. But he wasn't like that before and it was only that day and then him shouting at me today. He does care lots about me. But now he is resisting a break up and trying to justify himself or whatever, it is hurting. My housemates aren't even here to distract me and all my other friends are going to the same club as he is.

I don't need this. ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I go back to uni on Monday. And I shouldn't have talked to my mum about it because now if I change my mind she will have something to say about it.

Re: Ouch!

Posted: Sun Oct 04, 2009 2:33 am
by _Yoda
It sounds to me like you were seeing red flags, and felt it was best to break up before things got worse. Good for you!

If someone is being verbally abusive to you, that is not the kind of person you want to spend the rest of your life with....or even spend the bulk of your time with in a friendship situation.

Wanting to be treated with respect and as an equal is not trivial. You did the right thing. He certainly does not have the right to dictate to you what you can or cannot do on a daily basis. You are a grown, educated woman. If someone is going to have a relationship with you, they need to value you as an equal.

Concentrate on school and your career goals. As you pursue your own interests, the right kind of person who can complement your life will emerge.

Re: Ouch!

Posted: Sun Oct 04, 2009 8:28 am
by _JonasS
Thank you :) I am feeling a lot better today, just got nausia, but that's cos I'm not feeling so well anyway sigh. I start school tomorow which is exciting hehe.

Re: Ouch!

Posted: Sun Oct 04, 2009 6:33 pm
by _bcspace
Just tell the guy he doesn't need to be spending money on someone else's wife anyway and he'll be fine.

:lol:

I think it's harder because we were together sexually too


For shame.

Re: Ouch!

Posted: Sun Oct 04, 2009 10:25 pm
by _Dr. Shades
JonasS wrote:I think it's harder because we were together sexually too.

In that case, I guess you can kiss going on a mission goodbye.

When did you decide you weren't going on a mission after all?

Re: Ouch!

Posted: Mon Oct 05, 2009 4:24 pm
by _JonasS
bcspace wrote:Just tell the guy he doesn't need to be spending money on someone else's wife anyway and he'll be fine.

:lol:

I think it's harder because we were together sexually too


For shame.


Huh?
Dr. Shades wrote:
JonasS wrote:I think it's harder because we were together sexually too.

In that case, I guess you can kiss going on a mission goodbye.

When did you decide you weren't going on a mission after all?


OUCH, that was harsh. I didn't decide. :( I just didn't think about it.

Re: Ouch!

Posted: Mon Oct 05, 2009 4:57 pm
by _Yoda
It's amazing to me how the men on this thread immediately focused on Pirate's sexual activity. :rolleyes:

As far as a mission goes, Pirate....Gaz is correct. You can repent and still go. However, it seems like you have a lot of questions regarding the LDS faith, in general. It might be wise for you to get through school at this point.

It's also obvious that you do have a strong desire for a physical relationship. My advice would be to not let that desire override the other things that you think are important in a relationship. (Sorry, I'm a Mom...I can't help giving advice. LOL)

Re: Ouch!

Posted: Mon Oct 05, 2009 5:00 pm
by _The Nehor
If he was being abusive good on you for leaving. If he just got annoyed and a little heated once you may have overreacted.

Also, seconding BCSpace's shame on you. Especially since you weren't with this guy for long by my understanding. Be very careful. Being in that kind of relationship can create emotional ties with shoddy individuals. It's harder to sever the relationship at that point....especially for girls if those I know are any indication.