DiscussMormonism.com

Exenewetked,
Being dependent on someone that is abusive to you is a tough situation for anybody. Make some goals about being independent and put steps in place for how you will achieve those goals. My first instinct is to tell you to get as far away from that relationship as possible, as soon as possible, but I know that can be easier said then done. You need to be your own advocate, especially when those around you aren’t. Your Dad definitely sounds like somebody that has his own issues. Don’t let him make his issues, your issues. Realize that the crap you are taking from him isn’t about you. Google “toxic relationships”, and consider the advice given about how to separate yourself from the relationship. Your desire to please others may be keeping you from your own happiness. . . let that desire go, you deserve to be happy.

Is that so! Well, I did find it strange that somebody's first post in the forum would be a plea of help with a bad relationship. It also didn't seem to correlate with the forum. Ya think they'd at least mention that they be Mormon or something. At least it's good to know that the issue was disingenuous, which isn't to say that abusive situations don't happen. Hmmmmm. . . *here is Redefined, feelin' the fool, for taking the bait!*

I don't think you should feel a fool. It is a good topic to discuss. I would have disagreed with some of your pointers however. I don't think the approach you take would be a good one. A victim of abuse either needs to gain in confidence and self esteem dramatically or be faced with a life or death situation before leaving such a relationship. What would happen is the victim would begin defending the abuser and wouldn't accept your advice. You would have to build up a trust relationship with the victim and show them that leaving can be proven to be beneficial and that the bad things they probably expect would happen actually aren't likely to happen. That's why I just recommend such people talk about how they feel or seek a therapist rather than just jump straight to, just leave. Because they have heard that enough and don't need to hear that because it does nothing other than push them to make all sorts of excuses.