Thanks for the clarity - It was helpful and I think I'm tracking with you now. So, moving past that........
With only a couple of exceptions that come to mind - over many many years of board experience - I agree with you.
(Bold mine)My comments were more about the idea that the online world allows us to strictly control what parts of ourselves we will reveal to those we interact with. No one is a totally open book and rightly so, you have an obligation to yourself to protect and guard your life, feelings, beliefs, family, and so on. That said, the longer and more you post the longer you leave open that narrow window for others here to peer in and occasionally gain a glimpse of a different part of you.
Good stuff, Xeno.
When I read this, I thought about private messages and how I think they lend a lot of support to your words that I have bolded . Because I wouldn't feel comfortable using another board member as an example, I will use myself as an example: Over my decade plus time hanging out on these boards, I have sent and/or received a crap ton of private messages (the number must be in the 100's) Anyway, I can tell you that I have indeed shared many personal things (some very personal) in private messages. Interestingly enough, my experiences with private messages have also resulted in other people sharing personal things with me. So, given this, I think there is something to the part of your post that I have bolded.
But I am interested in going further - digging deeper - and I am asking that you all to go with me - to think with me - to help me sort it all out. I want to see if we can rip off the wrapping paper, remove the bow, tear open the box, and take a close look at what's inside. What's really inside.
So, now that I have provided, what I believe to be, very strong support for your bolded part - I want to discuss, consider, and think through why this is. Why am I hesitant to share things on the board that I share fairly freely in a PM? Is it because I know that the PM is only for the eyes of one person? Is it that I have reached a level of trust with this one person so I feel I can let my guard down? Does this have something to do with struggles to be vulnerable? Might this have something to do with a past experience that went bad so we don't want to take the risk of a repeated bad experience? Or, am I really over thinking all of this and it's much more simple - that being, we usually don't broadcast personal things on the public board because, well, it's just not wise. Full stop. At this point, I am leaning to the later but while I lean, I am also very interested to hear your thoughts on all of this. (For clarity, I am not talking about in real life information like real names - I am talking about personal information like sharing that you battled a drug addiction for several years)
Digging deeper: Why wouldn't I post something on the board that I would post in a PM? Is it based in fear? If so, is the fear real? And if the fear is real, what am I afraid of? If I am trying to be protective, what exactly do I think I am protecting? Why do I feel the need to protect whatever it is that I am protecting?
I agree that you have more control here, do doubt in my mind - I think you have significantly more control here.You have more control here than really any aspect of your life about the person that you present to the world
Having this kind of control brings me right back to our previous discussions about online personas. I had a good night sleep and I had more time to chew on this but I remain in a pretty foggy place about the entire online persona scenario. In my mind, at least currently, There still seems to be a kink in the hose on this for me. I know the water is on and I know there is a kink in the hose, but at this point, I still don't know how to fix the kink that would allow the water to run it's entire course and come out of the other side. So, given that, If there are any plumbers amongst us, I would appreciate some advice on how I might be able fix this hose blockage caused by online personas.